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ACT ONE
A bottlo on the strip. SHANE is at work. WILL is a customer choosing alcohol to buy.
SHANE. Sorry.
WILL. What?
SHANE. I wasnāt staring.
WILL. Okay.
SHANE. You look like someone.
WILL. Right.
SHANE. Sorry. Yeah. Do you need a hand?
WILL. Nah, just grabbing some grog.
SHANE. Let me know if you need a hand.
WILL. Thanks.
WILL surveys the drinks.
SHANE. What type of grog do you like?
WILL. All of it.
SHANE. Well, maybe you should get a selection.
WILL. Oh no. Iāll just get this.
WILL selects some pre-mixed bottles.
SHANE. Good choice. Let me take that to the register for you.
WILL. Iām right.
SHANE. Cool. This way. Um. Okay. āVodka Black Ice.ā I think thereās a button for that. Six-pack?
WILL. Four-pack.
SHANE. Four-pack of Vodka Black Ice. No. I canāt see the button for it.
WILL. Maybe you scan it.
SHANE. No. No I think thereās a button. Do you know how much it is?
WILL. About seven or eight bucks.
SHANE. Is it?
WILL. Nup. Let me check.
SHANE. Oh no. Iāll check. I have to learn the prices. Itās twelve ninety-five.
WILL. Cool.
SHANE. Twelve ninety-five? Is that a rip-off?
WILL. No. I mean theyāre like six-fifty each in a bar.
SHANE. Really? Sounds like a rip-off to me. Okay. Twelve ninety-five.
SHANE examines the cash register.
Oh, how does this thing work?
WILL. They usually scan it.
SHANE. Oh, have you been here before?
WILL. Yeah, heaps.
SHANE. Oh okay. Letās see. I thought I typed in the prices or something.
SHANE scans the drinks.
Oh yeah, no, thatās right. It must be the wines I have a button for. Youād think thereād be a button for these too because buttons are easier, hey.
WILL. Yeah.
SHANE is waiting for the register to open.
SHANE. I might practise scanning stuff later.
WILL. Cool.
SHANE. Ooh, hang on. Iād have to clear each sale, wouldnāt I?
WILL. I wouldnāt know.
SHANE. Yeah. Now it hasnāt opened. I thought the register just opened when you scan it.
WILL. I want to pay with EFTPOS anyway.
SHANE. Oh Jesus. You havenāt got cash?
WILL. Just shrapnel.
SHANE. The manager will be back soon. Do you mind waiting a second?
WILL. I kind of have to go.
SHANE. Oh, okay. I donāt know how to open the register, thatās all. Why did he, ohhh. I mean, why did he leave me here? I canāt do this. Iāve been here one day. This isnāt even my shirt. My nameās not Michelle.
SHANEās shirt is embroidered with the name āMichelleā.
I mean this is⦠look Iām really sorry. Err.
SHANE checks his pockets.
I donāt have⦠how much is it? Yeah see I donāt have any change in my pocket.
WILL. Oh, thatās okay. Iāll just wait.
SHANE. He wonāt be long.
WILL. Cool.
SHANE. Sorry, hey.
WILL. So youāve just started here?
SHANE. Yeah. Yesterday. I worked next door before that.
WILL. Maccas?
SHANE. Yeah. Just for a week.
WILL. Right. And is it good here?
SHANE. Well, yeah, I think so. Um, some of the guys are arseholes. The managerās a bit of a cock. He just thinks Iām so dumb.
PETER enters.
WILL. Is this him?
SHANE. No. I donāt know who this is. (To PETER.) Evening. Do you need a hand?
PETER. Oh well, thatās good service. Just looking for a wine.
SHANE. Can I help you?
PETER. Oh yes, well, I think so. Just in the market for a reasonable Chardonnay, I think.
SHANE. Red or white?
PETER. Letās try white.
SHANE. Okay then.
PETER. Keep it cheap and cheerful. Just off to a family thi...