FIRST
GIRL You fell.
BOY I never.
GIRL You fell.
BOY He tripped me.
GIRL You fell.
BOY The next lane he cheated.
GIRL You got tangled up in your own stupid feet.
BOY I still finished third.
GIRL Congratulations.
Third no thatās really impressive.
BOY I tripped but bounced right back up and finished third. Have you any idea how fast that makes me?
GIRL Slightly less fast than two other guys?
BOY I just ran out of time. If I hadnāt been tripped Iād have dominated that race.
GIRL Like I did with mine you mean?
BOY No one cares about 1500m. Itās a grannyās race.
GIRL Iād like to see a granny do what I just did. I left those girls in the dust.
Sprintingās so boring. Thereās no point. Just as youāre getting into it boom itās all over and youāre like what happened? Middle distance we got to be smart. Tactical.
BOY And what was your tactic?
GIRL Running faster than everyone else.
BOY Right.
GIRL You ought to try it some time.
BOY If I hadnāt been tripped
GIRL Fell.
BOY If I hadnāt been tripped heād never have beaten me.
GIRL But he did beat you.
BOY But what Iām saying is
GIRL But he did.
BOY But what Iām saying is
GIRL But he did.
BOY Youāre enjoying this.
GIRL Little bit yeah.
They kiss.
BOY Right. Where we gonna go?
GIRL I donāt know what you mean?
BOY Can we go back to yours?
GIRL My mumās in.
BOY So weāll be quiet.
GIRL So you said that last time. Your house?
BOY My little brotherās in my bedroom.
GIRL Get him nicely to leave the room. Worked before.
BOY Yeah I donāt know about that.
GIRL What dāyou mean?
BOY Well. Last time we did it in my bed he left the room. But. He didnāt go much further. If you know what I mean.
GIRL Oh god. He was listening at the door?
BOY Heās twelve. Heās just started wanking. Itās a very exciting time for him.
GIRL Okay your house is out.
BOY The park?
GIRL No.
BOY The library?
GIRL No.
BOY What about round the back of the ā
GIRL Donāt even finish that sentence.
Nothing romantic ever started with the words āround the back ofā.
What about booking a nice hotel?
BOY Oh yeah thatās a great idea. Let me just pull the money out my arse.
Iām just gonna say this.
McDonaldās got a clean toilet.
GIRL I am not having sex with you in a McDonaldās.
Again.
BOY You know what?
Chris said I could come by his work anytime.
GIRL Okay.
BOY Might be perfect.
GIRL Well where does he work?
BOY The kennels.
GIRL Oh my
BOY Theyāve got this vetās room at the back.
GIRL What is wrong with you?
BOY Itās got a bed in it.
GIRL If you think Iām having sex in a kennel
BOY Not in a kennel, at the kennels.
Yeah. Youāre right.
Shit.
There must be somewhere.
Oi. Wait a sec.
What about that butler?
GIRL What are you on about?
BOY That butler.
The old guy whose house you clean?
GIRL Mr Butler?
BOY Yeah!
GIRL Heās not a butler thatās just his...