Spiritual Direction

A Practical Introduction

Pickering

• Publisher: Hymns Ancient & Modern
• Year: 2014
• ISBN:
  9781848253742
• Topic: Theologie & Religion
• Subtopic: Christentum

Spiritual direction has been an intrinsic part of the Christian tradition since the earliest days of the church when desert mothers and fathers were sought out for their wisdom and guidance. This guide aims to equip clergy and laity engaged in this task, or in training for it.

1. What is ‘Spiritual Direction’?

1.1. A self-serving novelty or a God-inspired opportunity?

* Before we begin to look at how other people define ‘spiritual direction’, take a few minutes to write down your own thoughts about the term. You may want to explore your experience, note the ideas you have about how spiritual direction is done or what it hopes to achieve, your emotional response to the term itself and any questions which come to mind.

Whatever your personal experience of spiritual direction, the fact that you are holding this book means you have more than a passing interest in this ministry. However, although spiritual direction has always been part of the Christian tradition, it is not well understood, to some extent because of the terms ‘director’ and ‘directee’ which are found in much spiritual direction literature and history and which will be used throughout this book.

The word ‘director’ in common usage does describe someone whose role is to be directive, to tell others what they should be doing. The film director, for example, has the responsibility of seeing that actors portray the characters in a way that honours the script and story. However, if we think of ‘director’ as describing someone who helps people find their own route to God, it may be easier to set aside negative connotations.

‘Directee’ is used as a shorthand way of referring to ‘the person who comes to see a spiritual director’. Other terms could be used: ‘client’ is one option, but this tends to be more commonly used in a counselling or social work context; ‘friend’ is another possibility, but as we shall see in more detail later, some of the traditional elements of friendship, such as a mutual sharing of experience, are generally less appropriate in the spiritual direction relationship.

People, inside or outside the Church, may think spiritual direction has something to do with:

• being told what to do in my spiritual life by an expert;
• someone giving me ideas about how to pray;
• having a talk with the minister;
• being accountable to someone for my spiritual progress;
• only for super-spiritual people like nuns and ministers!

There are little grains of truth in some of the above ideas, but gross inaccuracies as well – so let’s look at each one:

‘Being told what to do in my spiritual life by an expert’

Christian spiritual directors would discount any claims of ‘expert’ or ‘guru’ status, being aware of their fallibility and frailty, and their dependence on God. One of the potential risks for spiritual directors is that directees may want to put them on a pedestal of piety. On the other hand, it is of little use to directees if their spiritual directors have little idea of the dynamics of the spiritual journey. A healthy balance of knowledge, humility, experience and attentiveness to God’s leading helps spiritual directors support the directees’ journey instead of attempting to create a personal following. Like John the Baptist, spiritual directors always point to the One who is greater.

‘Someone giving me ideas about how to pray’

Spiritual direction certainly has to do with prayer but in the context of the whole of the directee’s life: successes and failures, wounds and blessings, relationships, work, health, hopes and fears. This ‘definition’ of spiritual direction also implies a certain passivity in the directee, as if he or she is not going to be very involved in the decision-making but a docile recipient of someone’s else’s choices. This subtle expectation assumes that the spiritual director is going to make things happen for the directee, when in fact the Holy Spirit is the true director, drawing the directee to a richer encounter with God. Occasionally spiritual directors might offer some resources or ideas about methods of prayer, but this will only be in response to what directees have shared about their life, prayer experience, and God-given longings for deepening relationship.

‘Having a talk with the minister’

People talk to a minister about all sorts of things, not solely their journeys of faith. In reality, people bring personal problems, complaints, bright suggestions for new programmes – the list is endless. Spiritual direction takes place when the minister and parishioner are both intentional about paying attention to what God is doing in the parishioner’s life. Spiritual-direction conversations with members of their congregation can greatly encourage clergy as they hear stories of God’s activity in parishioners’ lives. Sadly, many ministers have not been equipped for this vital part of their ministry and may struggle to know how to maximize the opportunity which lies waiting in every pastoral encounter.

‘Being accountable to someone for my spiritual progress’

Most of us value having someone with whom we can evaluate any endeavour, and the Christian life is no different. Looking at spiritual direction this way, however, paints a picture of the directee being accountable to the spiritual director, rather than to God. A simple change of preposition will make a world of difference – ‘being accountable with someone …’ places the director alongside the directee, as a witness to the directee’s movement towards God, as an ally in the times of struggle.

‘Only for super-spiritual people like nuns and ministers’

Two assumptions lie behind this particular misconception. One is that spiritual direction is appropriate only for those who are in full-time ministry. However, lay people, by virtue of their baptism, have entered ‘the priesthood of all believers’; all people are equal in the sight of God and can participate in spiritual direction if they wish. The second assumption is that, just because people are ordained ministers or vowed religious, they automatically have a highly disciplined, effective and rewarding spiritual life which includes a lively relationship with God. This may not always be the case.

* * *

More accurately, spiritual direction could be defined as taking place when one person (the director) prayerfully supports and encourages another person (the directee) to attend and respond to God. As a fellow pilgrim, the spiritual director accompanies the directee on this journey of faith. The real ‘director’ is God the Holy Spirit, who initiates and inspires the directee’s deepening relationship with the Trinity, with his or her own self, with other people, and with the realities of life in the global village of the twenty-first-century. Christian spiritual direction seeks to help directees:

• dive deeper into prayer and draw closer to God in everyday life;
• discover God’s care in the midst of difficulties;
• become aware of the sacred within the ordinary events of life;
• honestly share with God their feelings, doubts and questions;
• become more like Christ and experience the fruits of the Spirit;
• move from a preoccupation with their sinfulness to a grace-full life of love and service.

Some current writers about spiritual direction have rightly drawn attention to the risk that directees might, at least initially, be more interested in developing their own spirituality without thinking much about the communal implications of growing closer to God. After all, there is much in contemporary society that promotes individualism, and spiritual growth is not immune to these influences.

Spiritual direction, however, is not about leading people away from the realities of the everyday world, or offering individuals a ‘feel-good’ experience, or fostering spiritual arrogance. Neither is it a more socially acceptable or trendy alternative to therapy. Spiritual direction is designed to help directees listen and respond to God – who desires relationship, and who longs for people to express the truth of who they are as they share their gifts, experience and personhood with others....