Judy Upton Plays 2

Bruises; The Girlz; Sliding With Suzanne; Gaby Goes Global; Lockdown Tales

Judy Upton

• Publisher: Methuen Drama
• Year: 2021
• ISBN:
  9781350249189
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Literature
• Subtopic: British Drama
• Index: Literature

Since her early break-through at the Royal Court Theatre in 1995, where she won the George Devine award and was joint winner of the Verity Bargate Award, Judy Upton has proven herself to be one of Britain's most prolific and diverse writers. In this, her second collection, we see work ranging from 1995 through to the 2000s and a collection of short work created during the 2020 Coronavirus pandemic. Bruises (1995) Royal Court Theatre, London - " This is no angry polemic but a subtly atmospheric piece... Neither writer nor director seeks easy answers in this coolly disturbing view of an issue usually hammered home with both fists." ( Evening Standard ) The Girlz (1998) Orange Tree, London - "Judy Upton's ever-promising career takes another small leap forward with this tantalising foray into characteristic Upton territory, the febrile world of foul-mouthed, disadvantaged young females from the south-east." ( Time Out ) Sliding With Suzanne (2001) Royal Court Theatre, London - "Judy Upton probably won't thank me for saying so, but her new play, Sliding with Suzanne, comes over as that rarest of phenomena - a contemporary play with a Right-wing agenda. If Margaret Thatcher went to see it she would be appalled by the language and much of the action but would, I suspect, end up applauding its sentiments." ( Telegraph ) Gaby Goes Global (2009) New Wimbledon Theatre, London - A wry and mischievous look at the benefits system, and the world of fine art. Gaby is a downtrodden employment advisor at the Benefit Delivery Centre. She tries to get rich by promoting the struggling artists who sign on. But it is Gaby who grabs all the attention - with the sort of exposure she hadn't bargained for... Lockdown Tales (2020) - "a story of struggle, hope, even more struggle and then hope which provides a sensitive and sincere insight into the mind of a key worker during lockdown … a must watch and is the epitome of the type of work that should be produced during lockdown." ( A Younger Theatre )

Sliding with Suzanne

A play

Judy Upton

Produced in 2001 at the Royal Court Theatre Upstairs and toured nationally by Out of Joint, directed by Max Stafford-Clark. A Time Out Critics’ Choice.

Original Production Details

Date: August–September 2001

Venue: Theatre Upstairs, Royal Court

Director: Max Stafford-Clark

Designer: Julian McGowan

Lighting: Johanna Town

Sound: Paul Arditti

Cast

Josh	Danny Worters
Luka	Bryan Dick
Theresa	June Watson
Suzanne	Monica Dolan
Ned	Roger Frost
Sophie	Loo Brealey

Act One

Scene One

A 7-Eleven-type convenience shop. Brighton. Night.

Seventeen-year-old Josh is on the till, reading FHM. Outside the window, sixteen-year-old Luka is gingerly prodding a hedgehog in the kerb with the toe of his trainer. He hesitates, crouches down to look at it, stands again and suddenly stamps on it hard, repeatedly.

Josh looks up from his magazine, sees Luka stomping on the hedgehog, is disgusted. Luka peels the hedgehog off the kerb, picks it up and enters the shop; he takes a can of Red Bull from the fridge, comes up to the counter.

Luka Bottle of Smirnoff.

Josh is staring at the hedgehog pancake. Luka’s hand is bloody.

Josh Er … have you got proof of age? I have to ask everyone.

Luka walks behind the counter, takes a bottle of vodka from the shelf, puts it down beside the Red Bull. He takes out a couple of crumpled notes to pay, dumps them on the counter. Josh puts the barcode reader on the Red Bull, then picks up the vodka bottle, hesitates, weighing up whether to risk a confrontation. Luka is examining the hedgehog.

Josh I can’t let you have this, I’m afraid.

Luka puts the hedgehog down on the counter.

Josh That’s sick. That’s murder. I’m calling the RSPCA.

Luka hesitates, then punches Josh hard in the face.

Josh Shit.

Luka takes the bottle and Red Bull and leaves. Josh holds his nose.

Exit Luka.

Josh has a nosebleed, his eyes are watering.

He exits, among the shelves.

Enter Theresa (age sixty) and her thirty-five-year-old daughter Suzanne approaching the shop.

They come in.

Enter Josh, dabbing at his nose with some bog roll.

Josh (to himself) Shit.

Theresa Grab a basket.

Suzanne walks ahead.

Josh … Excuse me.

Theresa Pick up a basket.

Suzanne ignores her. Theresa picks up a basket, starts shopping.

Josh Excuse me, we’re closing in a minute.

Theresa Thank you, we won’t be long.

Josh shrugs. From behind the counter, Josh takes a long-handled floor brush. He uses it to knock the hedgehog on the floor. Suzanne notices, watches, puzzled. He pushes the hedgehog along the floor then, taking a swing at it with the brush, sends it flying out the door, and turns the sign on the door to ‘Closed’.

Theresa I wish you’d let me know you were coming. If you’d just thought to ring, Suzanne. I’d have gone up Safeway’s. They’re so much cheaper than here.

Suzanne Yeah okay, hurry up, Mum.

Theresa I don’t see anything of you for months at a time and then you just turn up. Out of the blue.

Suzanne You don’t want to see me? You don’t want to see me, is that it?

Theresa It only takes a minute to phone. I can’t just be expected to drop everything for you can I? I might have had my own plans for the evening, but oh no, that wouldn’t enter your little head would it?

Josh goes back behind his counter, takes a spray bottle of disinfectant, sprays and scrubs his counter.

Suzanne Your own plans? Like you’ve started going to bingo or something?

Pause. Theresa picks up a box of orange juice.

Theresa One pound seventy – for juice?

She puts it back.

Suzanne Look there wasn’t time, I told you. Had to get the last train.

Theresa You could’ve phoned me from the station.

Suzanne There wasn’t time, Mum! Have you been listening to –

Theresa Wasn’t time to pick up the phone. Wasn’t time to make one little call?

Suzanne (mutters) Oh fuck off.

Theresa Yes, that’s right. Use ...