Career GPS

Ella L. J. Edmondson Bell, PhD, Linda Villarosa

• Publisher: HarperCollins e-books
• Year: 2010
• ISBN:
  9780061969409
• Topic: Desarrollo personal
• Subtopic: Carreras

"Career GPS serves as the business coach you never had but always wanted."
—Lois P. Frankel, Ph.D., author of Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office and See Jane Lead

Career GPS is a clear-eye, timely, and thought-provoking guide for any woman looking to advance up the corporate ladder and/or optimize her performance in any work environment, no matter what the state of the economy. Presented by Ella L.J. Edmondson Bell, Ph.D., founder and president of ASCENT—Leading Multicultural Women to the Top, and Linda Villarosa, award-winning former editor at Essence magazine and the New York Times, these "Strategies for Women Navigating the New Corporate Landscape" belongs on every working woman's bookshelf.

Chapter 1

Discovering and Embracing All of Who You Are

Success starts internally, and most successful people know that. Companies are looking for effective leaders, and the first tenet of effective leadership is self-awareness. That means it’s critically important to know who you are and to be comfortable in your own skin.

In the demanding new corporate reality, understanding yourself is key. Self-knowledge makes you more genuine, authentic, and confident—three traits you need to make smart career choices and manage all of your corporate responsibilities. It’s best to know yourself before you get in the game, but understand that self-awareness grows throughout the process. Even after you leave your job, you need to understand how to develop yourself as you move to the next stages of your life and career.

In this chapter I’ll explain the extreme importance of knowing yourself fully. I’ll also ask you to do two exercises. One will help you examine the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of your life and begin the process of healing and letting go. The other allows you to look at your whole life and reflect on your journey thus far. Each of these will help you establish a more authentic, confident, and grounded you.

---

Being Yourself—Whoever You Are

I met Sukshma Rajagopalan when she took part in one of my leadership development workshops. I was impressed with her authenticity, her ability to bring her whole self with her wherever she goes. Originally from India, she came to the United States at age twenty on a Rotary scholarship. She is a mature, grounded young woman who has created a comfortable life here while holding on to the parts of her culture that are important to her.

Sukshma is also the rare woman who’s found career success in the information technology arena, which is essentially still a man’s world. With an MBA from the University of Houston, she started as PepsiCo’s business solutions manager for the IT group in 2005 and was promoted to senior manager two years later. Not long ago, she was promoted again, to group manager. I asked her to discuss how she integrates her cultural beliefs and values into her work environment.

Though I had been raised and educated in India, when I first came to America I didn’t feel different. I didn’t think of myself as an Indian or as a woman; I was just me. When I dressed in ethnic clothes, people looked but they didn’t stare. Generally, they’d say things like “I love what you’re wearing” or “Your silk is so beautiful.”

Though I was raised with a strong sense of Indian culture, now, years later, I’ve become very American—as my mom tells me at least thirty times a day. But not totally; my culture is integrated into the life I have here in Texas. My husband, my parents, and I do Indian ceremonies at home, and we wear traditional dress on special occasions or when we go out.

At work, I have pictures of my family all over my cubicle and people often stop and admire them. My spirituality is important to me, so I also have a painting of my God, Krishna. Some people walk by and wonder out loud if it’s a picture of a friend or relative. Others look but don’t know if they can ask. If I see them looking, I don’t shy away from talking about it. It’s a good conversation point and gives people an opportunity to know who I am and what I’m about. We spend so much time talking about work all day that sometimes it’s nice just to talk about who you are.

---

THE IMPORTANCE OF KNOWING YOURSELF

Why is self-awareness critical? Your skills, talent, knowledge, personality, and strengths are your best assets as a professional woman, a manager, and a leader. Let me be more specific.

Self-knowledge builds confidence. Now, I didn’t say “boosts ego,” and I definitely don’t mean “makes you cocky.” We all know people who act supremely sure of themselves. They seem full of confidence, but I bet they are trying to hide some deep insecurities or fears. What confidence is not is acting like you’re the hottest thing out there because you’ve got an MBA from a top-ten school. Behaving like everything’s “all about me.” That’s not what I mean by confidence; any perceptive person can see right through someone like that.

Part of knowing yourself is being sure of you. But another part is understanding when your ego is out of control and knowing how to pull yourself back.

Self-awareness is one cornerstone of effective leadership. Leadership is one of the qualities companies look for aggressively, but you can’t develop anyone else unless you’ve developed yourself. And this means making the time to do the “me” work. Being an effective leader requires integrity, courage, and vision. People have to be able to trust their leaders, so you need to be able to talk the talk and walk the walk. A good leader knows “the buck stops here.” Other people see that she understands what’s important, what’s at stake. She knows when to take risks, when to pull back, and how to sort through choices and make tough decisions.

Leadership isn’t about the “big me.” Self-aware leaders are able to see the larger picture, the context and purpose. They actively listen and don’t put themselves ahead of others. They create a culture where others can flourish and be the best that they can be.

Without the grounding and the kind of direction that comes from having done the work that leads to self-knowledge, you’re like a handkerchief in the wind. When a conflict or difficult issue comes up, you’re unsure, your story shifts, your direction changes. That’s not effective leadership. In order to be a person others look up to, trust, and are willing to follow, you must be sure of who you are and what you think. Self-examination is the way to get there.

Being sure of who you are and what you want allows you to make sound career decisions. In today’s world, there are so many choices, and many of these options have only recently opened to women. So if you’re at the beginning of your career—or at a crossroads—having a better sense of who you are and what you want can help you push away things that are not really important and urge you to go after the things that are really in your heart. (I’ll help you do more of this work in Chapter 2.)

For instance, if you’re signing up for a very high-level job at an international company, you need to ask yourself a few questions: What are you willing to give up to work around the clock? How far are you willing to stretch? Would you be willing to move to a new city, state, or even country for the right job? Living abroad might be a brilliant career move, but is it right for you—for the person you really are, the family you have? Will you be too far from an ailing parent? Do you want your children to go to an international school?

Knowing, accepting, and liking who you are encourages others to do the same. Being authentic and genuine makes you attractive as a new hire, liked and respected as a colleague, and effective as a leader. Unlike in the past, when conformity was more the norm, today individuality is encouraged and prized.

---

Finding Your Own Special “Medicine”

LaDonna Harris, president and founder of Americans for Indian Opportunity, is a Native American activist and visionary. She is one of the wisest, most powerful, and most successful leaders I have ever met. Well regarded in corporate circles, she sits on the advisory boards and councils of several Fortune 500 companies, which are eager to tap into her insights and wisdom on diversity and leadership. I asked her to explain how she discovered what she calls her own “medicine” and share her vision for cultivating the gifts of others.

I was raised by my Comanche grandparents, and the basic philosophy of our social structure, and that of many North American tribes, is that every person has value—something to contribute to the whole. We think of it as your own special “medicine.”

I was fortunate to recognize my medicine at a young age, which made a huge difference in my life. As a child I was dyslexic, but I didn’t know it at the time. I thought I was stupid, that I couldn’t read or spell. I had very low self-esteem and spent a lot of time studying people. I became almost nonverbal, a stoic Indian girl.

But my grandmother saw something more in me; she saw that I was going to be a leader. With her, I showed a great interest in our Comanche culture. I was curious and always asking questions. She helped me grow and develop by exposing me to new experiences and giving me responsibilities greater than those of most children my age. I spent a lot of time with elders and attended meetings and ceremonies; I responded by learning and observing and growing stronger and more confident.

I believe my special medicine is recognizing the gifts that others have to offer. To me, this means recognizing the value in each person, acknowledging it to them, and making them feel good about their contribution. This is what leadership is.

If you understand that everyone has something to offer—their medicine—you’ll be able to bring out the best in each person. My grandmother taught me to watch and observe in order to figure out the gifts other people have to offer. Once you recognize someone’s medicine, you nurture it and help that person grow, like my grandmother did for me. Leadership is getting people to respond by nurturing their gifts and making them feel good about whatever they have to contribute. It means never leaving anyone behind, because each individual contributes to the success of the whole.

---

Understanding your wants and needs helps you say no when necessary. More than ever, jobs are very demanding. At the highest levels, you’ll be expected to be present just about 24/7 while keeping everything else in your life managed. With so much out there and so much to do once you’re in place, knowing your limits—just how far you can stretch before you break—is an important skill.

For women, this is essential. We tend to try to make everybody else happy, and we give up what’s important to us for the success of the organization, for the people we work with, and for the folks we love. Many of us do that because we think that’s how to get ahead and, even more, that’s how to be liked and loved.

But if you know yourself, it’ll be easier to determine exactly what you need to tolerate in order to be successful—and what you don’t. You’ll be sure to put yourself into the equation at the forefront, not as an afterthought. Self-awareness helps you hear and then listen to your voice within. Vision, good leadership, success, and joy don’t come from someone who’s only about go-go-go, do-do-do. You have to take time to close your eyes, exhale, and get in touch with your wise inner self to be effective.

ALL OF YOU: THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY

No one, even the best of us, is all good. It’s important to know, understand, and accept all of who you are—the good, the bad, and the ugly. Cultivating that kind of self-awareness helps you determine your growth edges, the areas where you may need to develop and stretch. I don’t like to describe these areas as weaknesses. A weakness sounds like a fatal flaw, something that makes you feel vulnerable or that is permanent and can’t be fixed.

Instead, we all have developmental needs. Some are based on our prior experiences and the pain that we’ve had on our life journeys. They can be physical, emotional, or spiritual. Others are cognitive or technical, signaling that we need more education, instruction, or training. For many women particularly, developmental needs—especially in the corporate area—come from not having role models, mentors, or coaches or not being exposed to corporate environments. Developmental learning is a lifelong process, and those who are willing to grow and stretch will discover a rich, more exciting, and complex person inside. Or as LaDonna Harris would say, “It makes our medicine stronger.”

Let me help you understand what I mean by the good, the bad, and the ugly. The good encompasses the parts of ourselves that we love, adore, and embrace. These are the natural gifts and treasures that you’re aware of and proud of. You’ve probably received positive reinforcement your whole life for being a good singer, great at math, an excellent writer, or a wonderful storyteller. Your parents, teachers, neighbors, professors, and pastor have all given you positive reinforcement for these skills and traits, so it’s easy to stay in the good.

Like the good, you’re probably also aware of the bad, those parts that need work. Maybe you’ve got a bad temper, can’t manage money, or need to exercise more. Think of these as the characteristics, traits, and behaviors that don’t work for you. It’s the New Year’s resolution wish list: “I’m going to speak up more, lose ten pounds, learn Spanish, and take a course to beef up my tech skills.” Also like the good, the bad gets reinforced in us, too—often by the same people who reinforce the good. The boundaries between the bad and the good are often loose. Most of us are conscious of our bad traits and are willing to try to make our bad characteristics good ones. Something good can become bad; something bad can become good.

The ugly is a little different. These are the parts that are generally hidden, especially from ourselves. Other people can often see them, but not always. The ugly comes from the events, experiences, and people in our lives that trigger deep shame. We d...