Well Said!

Darlene Price

• Publisher: AMACOM
• Year: 2012
• ISBN:
  9780814417881
• Topic: Business
• Subtopic: Meetings & Presentations
• Index: Business

Whether you're making a formal presentation, wooing a client, closing a sale, or proposing an idea, persuasive communication is essential.

Based on the same concepts that guide the author's award-winning training and consulting company, Well Said! teaches business professionals to put themselves in their audience's shoes and tailor their messages to the needs of decision makers.

Darlene Price reveals the simple but powerful techniques you can use to prioritize, organize, and economize your words so that your communication wins the day. Complete with real-life examples illustrating the concepts in action, this handy guide shows how to:

• use the words and phrases that get people to listen,
• capture and hold an audience's attention,
• gain instant credibility with decision makers,
• optimize body language,
• handle QA with finesse,
• make connections,
• shine with or without PowerPoint,
• perfect the elevator pitch.

You don't have to be a motivational speaker to get through to others. By placing words carefully and with confidence, you'll captivate your audience and make big things happen in your career.

SECTION III


Mastering a
Confident, Dynamic
Delivery Style

CHAPTER 7

Preparing for a
Powerful Performance

Start by doing what’s necessary, then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.

—ST. FRANCIS OF ASSISI

If we were attending the Nervous Nellies Convention, we would see an assortment of interesting mannerisms: Hands in the pocket jingling coins and keys, eyes staring at the floor, arms locked behind the back. There would be some hand wringers, pen clickers, and pacers; possibly a few ring twisters, scowlers, and fast talkers as well. All of these behaviors are unconscious expressions of uncontrolled nervousness that presenters often exhibit.

Tom was an outgoing senior-level executive and sales leader. Before I began coaching him, Tom attended a national sales meeting at a consumer electronics convention. While standing in front of the entire sales staff, he forgot what he was supposed to say. He just froze. Luckily, one of the other presenters jumped in and took over. After working with Tom for a while, I realized his anxiety about public speaking was so deep that I advised him to seek psychological counseling. The following year, after some sessions with a therapist and some coaching from me, Tom gave one of the highest-valuated presentations at the conference.

I found myself in a similar situation when I was in tenth grade. I was assigned by Ms. Weaver to deliver an oral book report on Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. It was my first time to present in front of an audience and I was very nervous. I had a thick Southern accent and I had trouble pronouncing the “S” and “R” sounds. I thought everyone was going to laugh at me as soon as I opened my mouth.

When my turn came, I walked slowly to the front of the class, like a prisoner walking to the gallows. I organized my three-by-five cards, looked down, and studied them for a moment. I felt my hands shaking, heart racing, knees knocking, and palms sweating. Then I looked up at the audience of students. As soon as I made eye contact with them, everything changed—all the nervous mannerisms went away. I didn’t have to worry about my presentation skills or whether they would laugh at me. Instead, I fainted.

When I awoke in the guidance counselor’s office, Ms. Weaver was standing over me. She looked me in the eye and said, “You can do this, and you will do this—next Tuesday morning at eleven.” Ms. Weaver made me work with her after school every day for a week to rehearse my speech. All of that practice really helped when Tuesday came around. This time, I didn’t faint, and although it was not an Academy Award–winning performance, I wasn’t terrible, no one laughed, and I remained vertical.

Ms. Weaver convinced me to join the Drama Club, the Debate Team, and eventually the Student Council. I remember a humorous adage she shared with me as we were practicing after school. She said, “You can’t get rid of the butterflies, but you can teach them to fly in formation.”

CONTROLLING NERVOUSNESS AND ANXIETY: FROM STAGE FRIGHT TO STAGE MIGHT

Truth be told, you don’t want to get rid of the butterflies because they’re carriers of energy and enthusiasm. Adrenaline is your friend. Years ago, one of the best speech coaches I ever trained with said to me, “Welcome the nerves, Darlene. They’re a sign that you care and want to do a good job,” to which I replied, “Boy, I sure care a lot!” The key is to control, harness, and focus that surge of adrenaline so that it works for you.

If you find yourself fighting nervousness when you present, and are afraid you’ll end up frozen stiff like Tom (or passed out like me) at the front of the room, try the following tips to help you train those butterflies. I’ve created an acronym called STAGE MIGHT featuring my top ten favorite techniques for managing anxiety.

Smile at yourself in the mirror before you speak, when you’re introduced, and during your speech as appropriate. The physiological effect of smiling emits brain chemicals that calm the nerves and promote relaxation. Always remember that a smile is the shortest distance between two people. It shows your audience that you’re happy to see them and enthusiastic about the message.

Talk positively to yourself and visualize your success. Even though you might not feel 100 percent confident at first, tell yourself you can do it! Experts in sports psychology have proven that an athlete’s self-talk and visualizations create self-fulfilling prophecies—good or bad. Thoughts create action, and actions create outcomes. Therefore, why not make your thoughts positive and reap the rewards? See in your mind your confident stride, warm smile, and adoring audience. Say to yourself, “I am a dynamic speaker.” “I am enthusiastic and engaging.” “I am liked by my audience.” “I am prepared and confident.” “I am on fire!” It really works.

Acknowledge the three audience truths: (1) They believe you’re the expert. The audience perceives you as the recognized authority simply because you’re the one speaking. Plus, you know more than they do about the topic. (2) They want you to succeed. The audience really wants you to be good and add value—otherwise it’s a waste of their time. (3) They don’t know what you’re going to say. In the unlikely event you forget something or reorder your points, don’t announce the error or apologize. They won’t know.

Greet the audience before you speak. Shake hands with and meet as many people as possible ahead of time. This shows the audience you’re approachable and personable. It relaxes you and turns “public” speaking into “personal” speaking, which makes the presentation feel like a continued conversation.

Exercise lightly backstage or privately before you speak. This will rid your body of excess adrenaline. It’s critical to prepare the body for the physical activity of public speaking. Do some light stretching, a few knee-bends, or take a brisk walk around the building. Take a few deep breaths: inhale through the nose on a slow count of three, and then exhale through the mouth on a slow count of three.

Memorize the first and last minutes of your presentation. Knowing the first words that will come out of your mouth gives you confidence and calms your nerves. It also enables you to look directly into the eyes of your audience and optimize the first impression when you begin. Likewise, if you nail the closing, they’ll remember you as confident and self-assured. Know your material.

Interact with your audience in the opening. Within the first five minutes, involve the audience. Ask a thought-provoking question; conduct a survey by show of hands; ask audience members to introduce themselves, if appropriate; generate responses an...