Resolving Conflicts at Work
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Resolving Conflicts at Work

Eight Strategies for Everyone on the Job

Kenneth Cloke, Joan Goldsmith

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eBook - ePub

Resolving Conflicts at Work

Eight Strategies for Everyone on the Job

Kenneth Cloke, Joan Goldsmith

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About This Book

Here is a completely updated edition of the best-selling Resolving Conflicts at Work. This definitive and comprehensive work provides a handy guide for resolving conflicts, miscommunications, and misunderstandings at work and outlines the authors' eight strategies that show how the inevitable disputes and divisions in the workplace actually provide an opportunity for greater creativity, productivity, enhanced morale, and personal growth. This new edition includes current case studies that put the focus on leadership, management, and how organizations can design systems to change a culture of avoidance into a culture of creative conflict. The result is a more practical book for today's companies and the people who work in them.

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Acceptance: of difficult behaviors, refusing; of emotions; increased; need for; of other people and perspectives; of paradox, contradictions, and other puzzles; of problems; of underlying issues
Accommodation: differentiating between, and other responses; natural tendency toward; only choosing, effect of; organizational cultures rewarding; questioning; reasons for; rewards for
Accomplishments, publicizing
Accumulated emotions, sudden release of, effect of
Accusations: closely listening to; as confessions
Accusing, sample phrases of
Acknowledging, as a listening technique
Acknowledgment: of contributions; of differences; of efforts; of emotions and feelings; importance of; of legitimacy and cooperation; of miscommunication, resisting; of needs and interests; of opponents; of opposing points of view; of own role in conflict; of a problem; responding with; of successes
Acting, being and, commitment to change way of
Action: based on emotional response; committed; internal consequences of taking, experiencing; quality of, perceiving intention through; translating intentions into; triggering
Action plans, creating
Actions: for approaching and engaging conflict; as choices; shifting focus to; taking responsibility for
Active, empathetic, and responsive listening: aspects of; benefit of; genuine; modeling; as probes; result of; starting with; techniques of. See also specific techniques
Active, empathetic, and responsive speaking
Acton, Lord
Adversarial attitude
Adversarial relationship structure
Adversarial style
Advice, seeking
Advisory committees/boards, forming
Affect, reflecting back
Agendas, meeting: keeping to; revealing, in advance; setting
Agendas, private: hidden, looking for; holding to; imposing, avoiding; letting go of
Aggression: differentiating between, and other responses; and honesty; hypnotic power of; logic giving permission for; natural tendency toward; no alternative other than; only choosing, effect of; passivity as; perceived, responses based on; reasons for; returning; rewarding
Aggressive negotiation
Aggressive negotiators
Agreements: clarifying and emphasizing; earlier, recognizing and complimenting on; formal, using consensus to compel, problem of; honoring; in mediation, effectiveness of; negotiating, for future forgiveness; perceiving unpleasant outcome from, exploring; reaching; taking longer to reach; time to reach
Allies, seeing opponents as
Alternative behavior, indicating understanding of, in apologies
Alternative responses
American Management Association survey
Amplified messages
Amygdala, the
Anger: accepting underlying issues without; arrogance of, overcoming; behaviors triggering; chain reaction of, lack of skills to manage; costs of; covert, subconscious ways of releasing; as a diversionary tactic; exploring; feedback without; from feeling unlovable; giving up, beginning with; hanging onto; letting go of, reasons for; managing, methods for; mask of; organizational, subconscious beliefs and assumptions about; passion experienced as; problem with; reasons for; source of, difficulty recognizing; and stereotyping; sustained, example of; toward ourselves understanding; as vulnerability
Annihilation, justification for, creating
Anonymous feedback
Apathy, as caring
Apologizing: alternative ways of examples of; resisting; and starting over
Approval, need for
Arrogance of anger, overcoming
Articulate speech, power of
Association for Conflict Resolution
Assuming, sample phrases of
Assumptions: apologizing for; avoiding; clarifying; about communication; about decision making process; about emotions; false and one-sided; hidden; hindering communication; about negotiating; about organizational anger problem-solving; about solutions, putting aside; underlying
Attachment, power of
Attacks, as smoke screens. See also Aggression; Counterattack
Attitudes: changed, recognizing; importance of; requisite, for resolving conflict; reversing, toward success and failure; and self-fulfilling prophecies; separations transforming; shift in; toward problem solving. See also specific attitudes
Audiotaping meetings/interactions
Audits: conflict; culture
Authentic voice: finding; responding with; in search of
Avoidance: continual, of underlying issues, effect of; costs of; creating a culture of; as a defense against change; differentiating between, and other responses; of emotions; entire ecosystems based on; label giving permission for; myths and assumptions encouraging; natural tendency toward; only choosing, effect of; reasons for; reducing level of, actions for; rewarding
Awareness: attitude of, practicing; of emotional experiences and elements; and emotional intelligence; increased; of interconnection; lack of; in leaders; of paradoxes; of process; using emotions to expand


Bakhtin, M.
Balance: attitude of, practicing; continuing to struggle for; in feedback; regaining
Barriers: addressing; identifying
BATNA (best alternative to a negotiated agreement)
Behavioral improvement, logic letting us off the hook from
Behavioral patterns: altering, that hinder resolution; from childhood
Behaviors: change in, requests for; separating personalities from; shifting focus to; specifying, in apologies; as triggers. See also Difficult behaviors
Being: and acting, commitment to change way of; modes of, shift in
Benefit of the doubt, giving others the
Bennis, W.
Biederman, P. W.
Binding arbitration
Biological context
Blaming: alternative to; and anger; creating culture of; and honesty; of leaders; of management; in meetings; as a power play; reciprocal; resistance resulting from; as a response to aggression; sample phrases of; shifting focus from
Blind obedience
Blind spots, awareness of
Blindness, internal and external
Body language
Bolman, L. G.
Bottom-line positions
Bottom-up communication
Boundaries: respecting; violating
Brainstorming, use of: to address difficult behaviors; benefit of; in consensus decision making; in creative problem solving; to improve meetings; in learning collaboration...

Table of contents