The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook

A Comprehensive Toolkit for Leading with Trust

Charles H. Green, Andrea P. Howe

• Publisher: Wiley
• Year: 2011
• ISBN:
  9781118163641
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Business
• Subtopic: Consulting
• Index: Business

A practical guide to being a trusted advisor for leaders in any industry

In this hands-on successor to the popular book The Trusted Advisor, you'll find answers to pervasive questions about trust and leadership—such as how to develop business with trust, nurture trust-based relationships, build and run a trustworthy organization, and develop your trust skill set. This pragmatic workbook delivers everyday tools, exercises, resources, and actionable to-do lists for the wide range of situations a trusted advisor inevitably encounters. The authors speak in concrete terms about how to dramatically improve your results in sales, relationship management, and organizational performance.

Your success as a leader will always be based on the degree to which you are trusted by your stakeholders. Each chapter offers specific ways to train your thinking and your habits in order to earn the trust that is necessary to be influential, successful, and known as someone who makes a difference.

• Self-administered worksheets and coaching questions provide immediate insights into your current business challenges
• Real-life examples demonstrate proven ways to "walk the talk"
• Action plans bridge the gap between insights and outcomes

Put the knowledge and practices in this fieldbook to work, and you'll be someone who earns trust quickly, consistently, and sustainably—in business and in life.

Part I

A Trust Primer

U.S. Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart once despaired of defining obscenity, but noted pointedly, “I know it when I see it.” Trust is much the same. People know when it exists and when it doesn’t, but cannot explain why or how it exists. And the concept of building trust seems even harder to describe, let alone implement.

We have made it our life’s work to better understand trust. Before we can discuss trust, however, we begin by putting it in context—without context, there is just theory and no practical implications. We could have simply suggested you do this or do that to build trust. That would only get you so far.

So we begin with a primer. This first section defines the key terms and concepts of our trust framework. We walk you through the difference between trusting and being trustworthy, along with other fundamental truths about trust. We also explore the dynamics of influence, which are important to grasp if you wish to consistently lead with trust.

Three frameworks will help you create personal and organizational trust:

• Attitudes—mind-sets or beliefs that provide fertile soil for trust.
• Models—three simple structures for understanding and applying trust.
• Essential Skills—the indispensable abilities and capacities of trust building.

With this solid foundation, you will be well equipped to put the practical tips, strategies, and best practices of later sections to work.

Chapter 1

Fundamental Truths

Building trust can be a surprisingly simple thing—yet it is anything but easy. Trust is a complex concept in human relationships. It is often misunderstood, even though it is something practiced somewhat unconsciously all the time. We intend this book to do double duty: to give you practical, commonsense advice, while at the same time allowing you to think critically and speak fluently about trust.

In this chapter we take aim at the complexities of trust, breaking it down so that it can be managed and more readily increased. We take a critical look at the paradoxes, dynamics, and language of trust. We explore maxims, such as “Trust is personal,” “Trust takes time,” and “There is no trust without risk.” We also describe the relationship between trust and influence and reveal the key that unlocks the mystery to being influential.

Fundamental Truth 1: Trust Requires Trusting and Being Trusted

Too often people use the word trust when what they mean is something else. In plain language, people talk about trusting—being willing to take a risk. People also talk about being trusted, or being trustworthy. When one person trusts and another is trustworthy, there is trust.

It is important to remember the distinction between trusting and being trustworthy. Usually, leading with trust requires you to focus on being trustworthy. However you cannot avoid occasionally having to do the trusting.

Fundamental Truth 2: Trust Is Personal

When trust is discussed, it usually refers to people. Yes, you can trust a company, but when you do, you are typically focusing on just one part of trust—dependability. It makes perfect sense to say a company or organization is dependable or reliable. It does not make much sense to say that a corporate entity has your best interests at heart or is sensitive to your needs, or is discreet. Those are things you would usually say about people.

Even when it does make sense to say an organization is credible or careful or focused on your interests, the reference is usually to the people in it. At root, trust is personal.

CASE STUDY

From the Front Lines: Trusting the Taxi Driver1

During a trip to Denmark, I (Charlie) took a taxi from my hotel to the local train station. The fare was 70 kroner (about 15 U.S. dollars). I gave the driver a 200-kroner note. He gave me back 30 kroner change. Clearly something was wrong.

I realized I had three options for dealing with this little unpleasantness:

1. I could assume the taxi driver made a mental slip, and politely point with a smile at the note that was still in his hand, so he would notice his error.

2. I could assume he was trying to cheat me—but since he still had the 200-kroner note in his hand, I could just sternly point to it, and let him pretend it was an honest mistake.

3. I could assume he was trying to swindle a foreigner, and respond in anger: “You’re short, buddy; give me the other 100, and you can forget about a tip.”

I went with option one. I noted my suspicions, but chose not to act from them. The driver quickly gave me the extra 100 kroner back with a smile as if to indicate, “Oops, my mistake,” and I chose to believe him.

The thing about trusting is that it’s catching. The way you behave toward others influences the way they respond back to you. Whether you expect the best or the worst of people, you’ll almost always be right.

—Charles H. Green

Fundamental Truth 3: Trust Is about Relationships

That trust is about relationships seems an obvious point. Yet many people in business slip all too easily into self-absorption by focusing in ways that take their attention away from the person whose trust they are looking to gain. There is no such thing as a solitary trusted advisor—the term itself implies a relationship.

A major factor affecting trustworthiness is the issue of whether you are self-focused or other-focused. A great phrase to remember is this: “It’s not about you.” If you can remember that, then you will always remember trust is about relationships.

Fundamental Truth 4: Trust Is Created in Interactions

You will not become a trusted advisor through great marketing programs, great presentations, or even great blogs or tweets. Trust is created in your exchanges with others—especially one-on-one. That requires mastering the art of conversation, which you will learn to do using the Trust Creation Process: Engage, Listen, Frame, Envision, and Commit.

Fundamental Truth 5: There Is No Trust without Risk

Ronald Reagan, the fortieth president of the United States, was known to quote a Russian proverb, “Trust, but verify.” For our purposes, the opposite is true. Real trust does not need verification; if you have to verify, it is not trust.

Insight: The Three Ps of Trust

The Three Ps represent the core of our thinking on trust. This mnemonic device is designed to help you remember them:

1. Trust is Personal.

2. Trust is Paradoxical.

3. Trust is Positively correlated to risk.

Ready to start your new trust-based mind-set? Mind your Ps.

Sometimes businesspeople forget this and try to ameliorate or mitigate all risks. This is ...