Coach to Coach

An Empowering Story About How to Be a Great Leader

Martin Rooney

• Publisher: Wiley
• Year: 2020
• Print ISBN: 9781119662198
• eBook ISBN: 9781119662204
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Personal Development
• Subtopic: Personal Success

Learn the secrets for becoming the inspirational coach everyone is waiting for

Think about the coaches you've had throughout your life. Most likely, some were good, others not so good. Maybe one or two were great. One thing is undeniable: Coaches can influence your life in ways that can be negative or positive. A coach can either build you up or tear you down. The world needs better coaches in all walks of life—if you're a parent, a teacher, a co-worker, or a leader, you are also a coach. Which kind of coach do you want to be? Coach to Coach helps you answer this question and shares the secrets to bringing out the best in a person, both on and off the field.

For more than twenty years, author Martin Rooney hascoached professional sport stars, Olympic champions, and business leaders to high levels of performance, analyzing thousands of real-life examples of what works and what doesn't. Reading like a simple parable, this engaging book gives you an easy-to-use yet highly effective formula for becoming a better coach for your teams, in your business, and in your personal life. Packed with valuable insights and expert advice, this appealing book helps you:

• Learn how to be a great leader by being a great coach
• Create positive lives for your children and the people you work with
• Inspire and motivate the people around you
• Turn your natural skills and talents into your own unique coaching style
• Use proven, time-tested coaching strategies to get results

Coach to Coach: An Empowering Story About How to Be a Great Leader is an ideal book for coaches, leaders, managers, entrepreneurs, educators, parents, and anyone wanting to bring out the best in those around them.

1
The Tunnel

AND THEN HE WAS THERE.

Things really couldn't get much worse. Another loss for the team, and as Brian Knight made his way toward the locker room, he realized he couldn't be more alone.

As he walked from the field into the tunnel, he thought about slipping out a side door and going home. Not only did he really not feel like facing the team or the other coaches, but he also felt his job was in jeopardy.

But if he snuck back to his house, things wouldn't really be better there anyway, he thought gloomily. His kids would already be asleep—a reminder of another day missed with them. And quietly slipping into bed next to his sleeping wife would only remind him of the growing distance between them.

Bills and stress were piling up. Maybe it was time to give up on coaching and get a “real” job.

“Not your best day, huh, Bri?” came a hoarse voice from what seemed out of nowhere.

Brian turned around to see an older man about his height, maybe in his mid-60s, standing with his arms and palms against the cool wall of the tunnel.

“Excuse me?” said Brian, in the kind of tone that let the man know he was offended.

“I said, it didn't seem to be your best day out there,” replied the old man. “It's pretty obvious the defense was the reason the team lost out there tonight. Not much to be proud of.”

This got Brian's attention and angered him. Now agitated and arms crossed against his chest, he retorted, “Look, man, I don't know who you are or how you got in here, but you picked the wrong guy to piss off tonight.” With that statement, Brian took a half-step closer to the man.

The old man, seemingly amused by his apparent aggression, stepped away from the wall, kept his hands at his sides and moved right within a foot of Brian. “Calm down, kid. Seems things are worse than I remembered. I'm not here to bring you down. I'm here to build you up.” And with a smile that seemed to disarm Brian a little, he added, “And besides, I really don't think you want to lose twice tonight.”

Looking into the old man's eyes, Brian saw a confidence and peace of mind that intrigued him. He could also feel something else. It wasn't aggression. The closest thing he could equate it to was compassion. The old man understood. This feeling and the smile on the old man's face actually made Brian crack a smile, too.

With the tension eased a little, the old man said, “Don't worry, kid, everything has a strange way of working out.”

At that moment, the locker room door burst open and the head coach yelled out, “Knight, get in here. We're about to address the team.”

Brian turned back to offer a quick apology to the old man, but he was gone. Brian paused, puzzled about where this man had come from and how he knew his name. But before he could process the exchange or his sudden disappearance, he heard his name yelled again and quickly headed back to the locker room for the usual postgame duties.

The rest of the night was the usual except for one thing. Yes, there was the review of the game, the plans for next week, and the long drive home. But instead of going to sleep feeling helpless, for the first time in as long has he could remember, Brian had a strange feeling of optimism that things could indeed work out just like the old man said.

2
The Grind

Every day was starting to seem like wash, rinse, and repeat. And not on a good cycle.

Getting up early for so many years had become natural to Brian, but that didn't mean it was easy. In fact, the morning knot he had in his stomach was getting tighter and putting his feet on the floor at 4 a.m. was getting tougher. More and more days started with him wishing he could just stay in bed.

Brian's two girls were also getting older and beginning to notice when he wasn't around. By the time he got home at night, they were either asleep or he was too wiped out or stressed out to do much with them. Sure, like most dads, he made it to the occasional lunch at home or school recital, but his conscience told him it wasn't enough. And when his oldest offered him some play money to buy an hour of his time the other day to stay home a little longer with her, it really hurt.

Things with his wife, Kelly, weren't good, either. She had always been on board with his dream of big-time college coaching, but the two different moves and his ever-increasing hours were taking their toll. With Kelly caring for the girls and also working as a graphic designer, conversations usually focused on their busy schedules. She had become distant and often appeared both frustrated and less interested in his dream. The most obvious proof of this disengagement was that it had been over a full season since she had attended a game to support him. “For better or for worse” seemed to Brian to be just things people unconsciously agreed to during their wedding vows. And when “the worse” started happening, it seemed like Kelly didn't remember that part of her vows at all.

Brian still loved football. Sports had always been the driver of his life. After his athletic career as a college linebacker ended, he naturally made the transition to coaching. Now almost a decade into this career path, however, he felt unprepared. And this lack of confidence became a vicious cycle of negativity and a lack of effort. He knew deep down if he kept this act up, his job wouldn't be safe for long.

On the field was where Brian always excelled. When he made the transition from athlete to coaching at his alma mater, he was familiar with the athletes he had played with and had their respect as a former star player and a teammate. This allowed him to work on the players' weaknesses and improve the defense. This led to some recognition and his and Kelly's first move up the ladder to a bigger program.

Success can often breed success, even if the success isn't yours. During his second coaching stint, Brian's team eventually won the conference championship and narrowly missed a national title. Although he didn't have the same impact on the players, the athletes on this team competed at a much higher level. Their success and a couple of first-round draft picks later, Brian appeared to be a premier coach who forged athletes at the highest level. This made him more marketable and in demand.

It was the second move and his current situation where things started to unravel. Or you could say that the truth about Brian's true coaching ability came out. Brian joined the staff of a high profile and nationally known head coach charged with rebuilding a former top program. It was going to be a tough task. The athletes wouldn't be the same caliber as those he'd coached in the past, but Brian was up for the challenge (and the increased pay and prestige, too).

The problems started for Brian when the athletes he coached didn't seem to be on board with his plan. Now ten years removed as a player (and two kids and a number of pounds heavier), Brian lacked both the command of respect and the ability to connect with the current players under his watch. The same thing was happening at home with his family, too. Of course, being a defensive-minded person, he rationalized his lack of appreciation from the team and at home as “their loss.” The trouble was, according to the head coach and Kelly, if Brian didn't fix the problem and turn this season around, the loss could be his.

3
The Showup Showdown

After a game, it is usual for the team to practice the next day. Since the season is short and condensed, athletes and coaches have to maximize the time to get physically and technically ready for the next week.

After a losing game, however, morale is usually low and aggressions can run high. Practice can often seem like a softer word for punishment. On that Sunday morning after the game, Brian would find out he wasn't the only one who was in a defensive mood.

Marcus Chase was the most talented player on the defense. A top recruit out of high school from Florida, some people questioned his decision to go to a program that was rebuilding. Now in his third year with the school, even he might agree it had been the wrong choice. Not only had the team not cracked into the Top 25, but his play had been highly criticized. Just like Brian, no one likes to admit when they aren't living up to their potential.

Marcus also hadn't recovered from the fallout of the game last night. Rarely do defensive players make highlight reels on ESPN. That is, unless they end up making an offensive player look really good. During the fourth quarter, on a big third-down play, Marcus was hurdled by a receiver as he attempted to make a tackle. Not only did this acrobatic play lead to Marcus making his first Sports Center highlight, it also led to the touchdown that sealed his team's loss.

Marcus was a bit of a lone wolf on the team. His teammates also knew his football pedigree and got the feeling from Marcus that he thought he was better than they were. Marcus always put in the work and did as he was instructed, but his quiet demeanor didn't position him as a leader. Being a talented player can be a lonely place. Especially when you aren't pl...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Table of Contents
• Foreword
• Introduction
• 1 The Tunnel
• 2 The Grind
• 3 The Showup Showdown
• 4 Cup of Coffee
• 5 Enthusiasm
• 6 Ultimatum
• 7 The Right Target
• 8 Eating Crow
• 9 The Real Definition
• 10 The Golden Rule
• 11 A Turning Point
• 12 The Two Abilities
• 13 Pointing Fingers
• 14 The Secret Move
• 15 The Holy Grail
• 16 Do the Work
• 17 Game Day
• 18 Bag of Peanuts
• Acknowledgments
• About the Author
• End User License Agreement