MR INCREDIBLE
This version of Mr Incredible was first produced by Longsight Theatre at the Underbelly Cowgate, Edinburgh Festival Fringe on 4 August 2016. The cast was as follows:
ADAM | Alistair Donegan |
Director | Sarah Meadows |
Producer | Rosalyn Newbery |
Designers | Justin Nardella |
| Catherine Morgan |
Lighting Designer | Jamie Platt |
Composer/Sound Designer | Benedict Taylor |
Stage Manager | Anna Hunscott |
Mr Incredible was first performed at VAULT Festival, London, on 10 February 2016, with the following cast:
ADAM | Alistair Donegan |
Director | Sarah Meadows |
Producer | Rosalyn Newbery |
Designers | Justin Nardella |
| Catherine Morgan |
Lighting Designer | Jamie Platt |
Composer/Sound Designer | Benedict Taylor |
Stage Manager | Laura Merryweather |
For my sisters
‘Men are afraid that women will laugh at them.
Women are afraid that men will kill them.’
Margaret Atwood
‘If the complainant (I do not refer to her as the victim)
was under the influence of alcohol or drugs, or both, when
she was “raped”, this provides the accused with a complete
defence. End of story and a victory for fairness, moderation
and common sense!’
Top UK barrister David Osborne, in a blog post entitled
‘She Was Gagging For It’, February 2015
Characters
ADAM FREEMAN, a thirty-one-year-old man from London MAN, voice-over
This ebook was created before the end of rehearsals and so may differ slightly from the play as performed.
Scene One
Lights snap up on a modern, sparse office. Very little on stage other than an expensive leather office chair and a large pot plant. ADAM FREEMAN is kneeling next to the plant. He vomits into the plant pot. He breathes heavily. He spits. After a minute he looks up apologetically.
ADAM Mate
God. I’m sorry.
I’d never normally vomit into another man’s ficus.
He laughs.
I feel completely
Yeah
I don’t know what this feeling is, but whatever it is, it’s a bit er
Nauseating
In a good
It was a happy vomit
Should I…?
He looks at the plant.
I’m really really sorry, I don’t know where that came from
Shock, maybe. Relief. I don’t know.
Sort of
A
Can I get a drink, a
A
A beer?
A beer would be
I knew that mini-fridge was packing something fun
He leaves to grab a beer.
MAN (V.O.) Mr Freeman?
Adam Freeman?
ADAM (Returning.) Feeling much better after that.
I’ll er, replace the plant. Don’t worry.
He drinks beer.
Honestly I er
I knew, I know
But just to have it all sorted out is
Because I’ve been through hell
The worst I I mean the worst feelings
The er
He is close to tears, and turns away.
MAN (V.O.) You are Adam Freeman?
Of 67 Wilders Avenue –
ADAM Mate I’m sorry
I’m literally acting like a pregnant woman. Puking and crying.
Maybe I should just get pissed
He drinks deeply.
MAN (V.O.) Is there anyone else home
ADAM What do people do now
Typically
Usually I’d
MAN (V.O.) Do you mind if we come in
ADAM (Softly.) I wish I could call
He pulls his tie off.
It’s hot, is it hot
MAN (V.O.) Is this where you
ADAM It’s hot
He starts to unbutton his shirt.
Is it
MAN (V.O.) Is this where
Is this where
Is this where you
ADAM I hate this stuff this office… wear, if you
He pulls off the shirt. He has a ratty T-shirt on underneath.
Better
MAN (V.O.) Is this where
Is
Is
Is
You
ADAM What do people do now
When it’s over
MAN (V.O.) You you you you you you you – (Repeats.)
ADAM Fucking hell
He pulls his trousers off. Underneath he is wearing crap shorts. The male voice is still repeating the word ‘you’.
It’s hot
Is it
ADAM looks overwhelmed. He leans on his knees, like he’s just run a race.
Is it
The voice-over and background noise grow louder. ADAM takes off his shoes. He kneels on the ground.
IS IT
Everything stops. Silence. ADAM looks up.
MAN (V.O.) Can you come with us please?
Blackout. The male voice breaks, repeats and refracts.
Scene Two
The sound dissolves into the chorus of ‘The Power of Goodbye’ by Madonna on a thirty-second loop. The lights come up. A coat is slung over the office chair. The chorus repeats several times.
ADAM comes in, wearing the shorts and T-shirt from the previous scene, but with trainers and a red hoodie. He notices the music and rushes over to grab his phone out of his jacket pocket. He presses a button. The music stops.
Awkward pause.
ADAM Haha, sorry about that, that er
Haha
Did that, um
Was that playing for long?
He checks the screen.
Oh, eight missed calls. That’s good. Just eight.
Just eight choruses of ‘The Power of Goodbye’
Which, is clearly
My ringtone
Bet y...