Thick As Thieves

Katherine Chandler

• Publisher: Nick Hern Books
• Year: 2018
• Print ISBN:
  9781848427761
• eBook ISBN:
  9781788501194
• Topic: Literature
• Subtopic: British Drama
• Index: Literature

Two women from very different worlds: Karen has built a picture-perfect life while Gail struggles to keep hers together. When Gail re-enters Karen's life from out of the blue, she brings with her everything Karen has been running from…

Katherine Chandler's tense, revealing play explores what it means to care for one another and asks who, in a time of increasing disconnect, we expect to look after us.

Thick As Thieves was premiered at Theatr Clwyd, Mold, in October 2018, in a co-production between Clean Break and Theatr Clwyd.

Acclaimed theatre company Clean Break produces ground-breaking plays with women writers and actors at the heart of its work. Founded in 1979 by two women prisoners who needed urgently to tell their stories through theatre, the company today has an independent education programme delivering theatre opportunities to women offenders and women at risk, in custodial and community settings.

One

The Factory

Although the scene is real and a single incident, it’s also surreal and a representation of many incidents in GAIL’s life. The many times that she has come up against broken rules and routines and closing doors and second chances.

It should reflect the chaos she has in her thoughts and the cycle of obstacles she faces repeatedly.

A radio can play. On and off. Nina Simone songs come in and out. A variety but must have ‘My Baby Just Cares for Me’ within the mix. White noise and levels of louder volume as and when useful to suggest absurdity. A buzz might be helpful.
A door might slam off somewhere. The lights flicker/dim. A door might lock.

There might be a chair or a desk that would suggest an office/something official.

Between her dialogue, which is directed at random members of the audience, GAIL will do all or some of the following:

Wait.

Fidget.

Sit up and down, out and in, of the chair.

Pick at herself.

Drum her fingers.

Jump.

Turn around.

Get confused.

Rub her eyes.

Turn and stand with her back to the audience.

Sniff.

Fuss her hair.

Circle the space.

Sniff again.

Clear her throat.

Be bothered by her nose.

Hum. ‘My baby…’

Childish formula dancing.

Wipe her nose with the back of her hand.

Look at the back of her hand. Shit, shouldn’t have done that.

Wipe her hand in her skirt.

Look around.

Rub down her clothes.

GAIL is onstage. Alone. Waiting. She paces. Circles. In her own time she finds her place. Directs her dialogue at audience members. Using all of the audience. Moving at the reset.

GAIL I know you said to phone.

But. You know.

By the time I call.

Sorry. I am. I’m sorry.

How late was I?

Five minutes?

Twenty-five.

Okay, well I thought it was less so.

Sounds break into the scene. The radio changes. The lights are brighter/dimmer.

GAIL resets.

I was going to call, it’s just…

I didn’t so.

Okay, well.

I know that, I just thought.

I thought it was less.
I thought.
About ten or something
like that.

Last time?

I don’t remember that.

There’s nothing wrong with my memory.

Alright?

Sounds break in.

GAIL resets.

I think it is, yeah.

Sorry. I am. I’m sorry.

But. You know.

People like me?

I know. And I’m grateful, miss.

I need this.

Yeah. Yes.

It does.

It does help.

And I’m grateful.

Sounds break in.

GAIL resets.

It won’t happen again. I swear.

Four minutes? Was I?

That was a piss. I’ll bet that was it.

I mean, come on.

I was an hour late on the 23rd.

If you wanna do me for late.
Make it a good one at least.

I do try.

I did.

Sounds break in.

GAIL resets.

It’s not excuses.

It’s not. I’m just telling you.

It’s reasons.

Things happen. To me they do.

I’m not lying.

I know.

I was offered the position in good faith. I was.

Decency?

I’m decent.

Come on.

Miss.

Please.

Sounds break in.

GAIL resets.

I know all about honesty.

You saying I’m not honest?

I value it too.

You haven’t got the what’s-it-called on that. Honesty.

Poor attendance? Yeah well.

Performance?

I can read.

I said, I’m sorry.

Look. I’m sorry alright.

Don’t.

Sounds break in.

GAIL resets.

I know all about the disciplinary action.

I didn’t attend that meeting, so.

It’s not what you’re thinking.

I tried.

I got the letter, I said…

And that, the attatchment, I got that.

And I was gonna phone to discuss the stuff what it said.

I was.

I know that now.

I don’t know why.

Sounds break in. ‘My Baby Just Cares for Me’ is in among them.

GAIL resets.

Four weeks’ notice?

What now? From now?

What about the four weeks?

And that’s it?

Payment in what?

Where will you forward it?

I don’t know, do I.

I worked hard.

I did.

Sometimes things… it’s not excuses. I’m just saying, you got it wrong.

You got me wrong.

It’s not right this.

Thirty days to appeal?

Does that work, does it?

You reckon that’s gonna work?

Okay, I see it. I can read, you know.

Yeah, well.

Well…

Here we go again.

Sounds break in.

The lights flicker/change/radio changes to loud white noise

A loud buzz.

GAIL starts to hum over the buzz: ‘My Baby Just Cares for Me’...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title Page
• Contents
• Original Production
• Foreword
• Acknowledgements
• Dedication
• Characters
• Thick As Thieves
• About the Author
• Copyright and Performing Rights Information