LIT

Sophie Ellerby

• Publisher: Nick Hern Books
• Year: 2019
• Print ISBN: 9781848428928
• eBook ISBN: 9781788502573
• Topic: Literature
• Subtopic: British Drama
• Index: Literature

'I'm making him work for it! Got him to buy me a pack of Tangfastics and a can of Lilt before I showed him my tits.'

The problem with love is that it's different for everyone. For Bex, love is a handjob in detention and the promise of a date at a Chinese buffet. She doesn't even like Chinese.

Sophie Ellerby's play LIT explores the turbulent teenage years of a Nottingham girl looking for love in all the wrong places. It premiered at the HighTide Festival Aldeburgh, Omnibus Clapham and Nottingham Playhouse in 2019, co-produced by HighTide and Nottingham Playhouse.

BEX SAYS GOODBYE

BEX stands next to a newborn baby in a plastic neonatal cot in hospital.

BEX. This is it then.

If I don’t cry, it don’t mean I don’t love you alright? It’s just. Hard. Innit.

BEX looks at her baby.

Look when I get out, I reckon we should move to the countryside. Cos we could get chickens. Could ride ponies. All them sorta things what people do in the countryside, like gardening and stuff. In a little cottage or summit. Like three bears’ cottage. With a straw roof. No, I know, it’s mad innit? People seriously still live in them kinda houses though Amy, it’s true. I saw it on Location, Location, Location.

Cos then you can go primary school near a farm and we can feed the ducks and stuff. Honestly, this episode was just like – oh my god, I want that. Kirsty and Phil were like totally biggin up this area, I think it were called Gloucestershire or summit. Proper countryside. With sheeps and cows and all that. Like proper.

But that’s it innit. Nature and shit. That’s what we need. We’ll be dead free. And we won’t have to be scared. Of anything.

Silence.

Dunno what I’m meant to say to ya. Not like you’re gonna remember it so…

Just know that I’m gonna make it so much better for you. That’s a promise. Cos it ain’t been no fairytale for me Amy. Life.

Them stories that they tell ya, that they’re gonna tell ya, when you start going school n that, when you start reading. They’re a loada shite.

Cos they make out like princesses are so fucking perfect but. They’re always waiting for some bloke to come and rescue them, like seriously, what is that about?

No one can save you in life ’part from yourself Amy, you hear that?

I could write better fairytales than that crap.

Beat.

Once upon a time there was this princess right. She were dead pretty. Obvs. Everyone knew who she was. She were basically famous.

And her name. Her name was…

BEX ISN’T HUNGRY

Mid-July. The last week of Year 9 before the summer holidays.

A kitchen. Radio 4 is playing, it beeps signalling it’s 8 a.m., followed swiftly by a news report. The table is laid for breakfast; Coco Pops, a bowl, spoon and some milk in a porcelain jug. BEX is sat dressed in a pink fluffy dressing gown. SYLVIA enters in a hurry, doing three things at once.

SYLVIA. Bex! Quickly. We’re late.

BEX picks up the milk jug, sniffs it. SYLVIA takes a brown envelope out her bag, places in front of BEX.

Money for the trip. Don’t go spending it on sweets, or cigarettes, or whatever.

BEX. I don’t smoke.

SYLVIA gives her a look like ‘you don’t fool me’.

SYLVIA. You’re not even dressed yet! And I don’t need another phone call home. Remember what Miss Riley said about uniform rules. To the knee.

BEX rolls her eyes.

Maybe I’ll go back to John Lewis and buy the other skirt. The one with the pleats. One you can’t roll up.

BEX. I’m not wearing that.

SYLVIA’s mobile starts to ring. She looks anxious and turns the radio off.

SYLVIA. We’re late.

BEX. Where’s the milk?

SYLVIA. It’s there.

BEX. Not got proper milk?

SYLVIA. Almond milk’s better for you.

The mobile continues to ring.

BEX. Tastes fucking rank.

SYLVIA. Excuse me?

BEX (mumbles). Sorry.

SYLVIA. Toast then?!

The mobile continues to ring.

BEX. I’m not hungry.

SYLVIA. Well you have to have something!

BEX. I just said I’m not hungry.

SYLVIA. But it’s breakfast.

BEX. You can’t make me / eat it.

SYLVIA. But breakfast is the most important meal of the day!

The mobile stops ringing. They stand there in silence for a moment. It’s awkward.

Starting the day off shouting isn’t good for anyone.

BEX. I’m not shouting. You’re shouting.

SYLVIA. Last week you said almond milk would do.

BEX. Changed my mind. It’s rank.

SYLVIA. Right. Well.

BEX. Don’t wanna go school today. Feel sick.

SYLVIA. You’re not sick.

BEX. I am. Got flu.

BEX coughs. SYLVIA’s mobile starts to ring again.

SYLVIA. I haven’t got time for this. You’ll have to get the bus.

She takes out some money, gives it to BEX.

This isn’t an opportunity to skive off again. I’ll be ringing Miss Riley at lunch, check you made it in.

She goes to leave then turns back.

Are you sure you won’t need a swimming costume?

BEX. It’s not swimming.

SYLVIA. And don’t forget your pack lunch, / it’s in the fridge.

BEX. It’s white-water rafting.

SYLVIA. I put you in two Babybels because…

BEX. Oh my god.

SYLVIA. Well just because…

The mobile continues to ring.

BEX. Are you not gonna get that?

SYLVIA picks up the call on her mobile and leaves for work. BEX pours the Coco Pops in the bowl, adds the almond milk, takes one mouthful, chews, then spits it back out in disgust.

BEX MEETS RUTH

Later that day.

A riverbank at Holme Pierrepont: the outdoor National Water Sports Centre. BEX is stood looking out over the water sucking on a large fluorescent-green lollipop; deep in thought. RUTH is sat a few metres away reading the final Harry Potter book.

BEX. I’m Bex. Bex Bentley. Like the car. Proper classy, that’s me.

RUTH. I know who you are.

RUTH goes back to her book. BEX sucks on her lollipop. After a short while…

BEX. Conversation’s not your strong point is it? Can see why you’...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title page
• Contents
• Original Production
• Dedication
• Author’s Note
• Characters
• Note on Text
• Lit
• About the Author
• Copyright and Performing Rights Information