Chapter
1
Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life
The moment I take responsibility for everything in my life is the moment I gain power to change anything in my life.
Affirmation Based on a Quote by
HAL ELROD
In ancient days, architects and builders had few measuring tools. As a result, the most important step when building a structure was the placement of the very first block of stone. All the remaining stones were placed based on this first stone: the cornerstone.
The cornerstone of all the success principles is this one: Take 100% responsibility for your life. Everything else rests upon fully understanding and applying this principle. If you are really finally ready to begin to do what it takes to go achieve your next level of success, happiness, and the fulfillment you desire, then I want you to fully commit yourself to the study and application of this principle.*
If there were an easier way to have the life of your dreams, believe me, I would tell you. Really. I learned this first principle myself more than 30 years ago, and it has made all the difference in the success that I and the hundreds of thousands of my students have achieved.
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
To take 100% responsibility for your life and your results means that you accept the fact that you are the one in charge of all the results you produce. When you fully realize that youânot your circumstances and not other peopleâare responsible for your success or lack of success, your life will dramatically shift. When you realize that it is your actions or lack of action, your thoughts and beliefs, and the pictures that you create in your mind, then you will have taken the most important step you can take toward a life of freedom, abundance, and fulfillment. When you realize you always have a choice in every moment about what you think and how you act, you will have reclaimed your powerâthe power to create the life you truly want.
There is an important formula that captures the simple essence of this truth.
E + R = O
EVENT + RESPONSE = OUTCOME
The essence of this formula is that everything you are currently experiencing (your current Outcomes) are the result of how you Responded to earlier Events in your life. And if you donât like your current outcomes (your health, your weight, your income, your total savings, the quality of your possessions, the quality of your relationships, your level of happiness, your golf score, your job, your sales numbers, where you live . . . everything you currently have and are experiencing), then you have to change the way you are responding to the events that show up in your life!
Let me give you an example.
Letâs say you are given a $4,000 bonus at the end of the year. Thatâs an event. One response, after taxes are taken out, is to invest the remaining $3,200. The outcome of that is that one year later you have an additional net worth of $3,394. If your response is to spend your bonus, you have no additional net worth. Same event . . . two different outcomes.
Hereâs another example. Someone offers you a large piece of chocolate cake at the office party. One response is to eat it. The outcome from that would be to put on more weight. The other response would be to politely refuse it, saying you are cutting back on your sugar intake, and the outcome from that is you maintain your body weight.
Life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you respond to it.
LOU HOLTZ
Legendary College Football Coach and ESPN Analyst
There are only three responses (Râs) that you have any control overâyour thoughts, the visual images that you create in your mind, and your behavior, which includes what you say (or donât say) and your actions (what you do or what you donât do). That is all you have control over.
You might be asking, âWhat about feelings? Arenât they a response?â Actually 99% of feelings are an outcome of how you think about something. If you reject me, in order for me to feel sad or angry, I have to first think a thought like, No matter what I do, nobody ever accepts and includes me; I am going to be alone forever.
One of the greatest differences between successful people and those who would merely like to be is how they respond to the events and opportunities in their lives. Here is another example of the same event, with different responses producing different outcomes.
| Event | + Your Response | = Outcome |
| Your spouse forgets your birthday. | You tell yourself, âS/he forgot my birthday. That means s/he doesnâ... |