There is a joking saying that âLove is homesickness.â Whenever a man dreams of a place or a country and says to himself, while he is still dreaming: âthis place is familiar to me, Iâve been here before,â we may interpret the place as being his motherâs genitals or her body.
â Sigmund Freud, âThe Uncanny,â 1919 (SE 17.245)
But in fact we were always like this,
rootless, dismembered: knowing it makes the difference.
Birth stripped our birthright from us
so early on
and the whole chorus throbbing at our ears
like midges, told us nothing, nothing
of origins, nothing we needed
to know, nothing that could re-member us.
âAdrienne Rich, âTranscendental Ătude.â1
i: âThe difference between m and nâ
In Freudâs writing about âscreen memory,â memory and the mother are intimately associated from the start. In The Psychopathology of Everyday Life (1901), Freud devoted a chapter to the topic of âChildhood Memories and Screen Memories,â which he later substantially revised to include some of his own memories. By âscreen memories,â he means memories that preserve, associatively, not an ostensible âcontentâ but something that is âscreened offâ or unavailable to consciousness. This associative link always involves a chronological distortion. Either the manifest content derives from a later (unconscious) experienceâthe âmemoryâ being in this case retroactively recovered or retrospectively constructedâor a recent experience serves to inscribe repressed content dating back to earliest childhood, and, as it were, âdisplaced forwardâ (SE 6.43â44). Alternatively, a screen memory may hide something that is contemporary or contiguous in time. Either way, the status of memory is put in question. Instead of being a recovery of the past in the present, it always involves a revision, reinscription, or re-presentation of an ultimately irretrievable past. The past ceases to be the proper referent of memory; rather, memories âreferâ (improperlyâthat is, metaphorically or metonymically) to the unconscious. Memory, then, becomes a mode of âreproductionâ (Freudâs term) like any other, one that resembles dreaming not only in its distortions and displacements but in its paradoxical relation to a forgetting that is always, though unconscious, deliberate and purposive. Just as a dream represents the fulfillment of a repressed wish, so a memory represents a contradictory desireânot the wish to remember, but the wish to forget.
In his correspondence with Fliess, which provides a running commentary on the self-analysis carried on with particular intensity between May and mid-October 1897, Freud specifies that the element responsible for repression âis always what is feminine.â âIn every instance,â he insists, ârepression starts from the feminine aspect.â 3 We might translate this as follows: âWhat gets repressed is femininity.â At stake in these memories (Freudâs own) is nothing less than childhood sexuality, which for Freud is always oedipal rather than preoedipal; hence, we might say that these memories preserve the repressive inscription of sexual difference. What gets repressed is precisely âthe feminineâ or the childâs bisexualityâif you like, the motherâs desire in him as well as his desire for the mother. Freud tells us that he was first alerted to âthe tendentious natureâ of memory by the striking fact that memories preserved from earliest childhood appear to be (his term) âindifferent.â The word âindifferentâ recurs in his account of âScreen Memoriesâ with troubling insistence. What is an âindifferentâ memory? Could it be one in which the inscription of sexual difference has been elided or repressed, and along with it not simply sexuality but what Freud terms âthe feminineâ? This infantile amnesia is for Freud the âstrange riddleâ that (no less than the riddle of femininity) perplexes the analytic self-interpreter. The key to it, he claims, may unlock our understanding of other amnesias, those purposive forgettings which provide the basis for all neurosis.
To prove his point, Freud tells an anecdote which turns on the displacement of sexual difference onto the ostensibly indifferent scene of writing:
A man of twenty-four has preserved the following picture from his fifth year. He is sitting in the garden of a summer villa, on a small chair beside his aunt, who is trying to teach him the letters of the alphabet. He is in difficulties over the difference between m and n and he asks his aunt to tell him how to know one from the other. His aunt points out to him that the m has a whole piece more than the nâthe third stroke. There appeared to be no reason for challenging the trustworthiness of this childhood memory; it had, however, only acquired its meaning at a later date, when it showed itself suited to represent symbolically another of the boyâs curiosities. For just as at that time he wanted to know the difference betweem m and n, so later he was anxious to find out the difference between boys and girls, and would have been very willing for this particular aunt to be the one to teach him. He also discovered then that the difference was a similar oneâthat a boy, too, has a whole piece more than a girl; and at the time when he acquired this piece of knowledge he called up the recollection of the parallel curiosity of his childhood. (SE 6.48)
In this classic representation of sexual difference (âThe m has a whole piece more than the nâ), binary opposition leads to asymmetry; m has something that n lacks, âa whole piece more,â or an extra âmember,â although to be without it is to be less than whole. That this asymmetrical structureâthe minimal difference between two adjacent characters, a difference characterized as feminine lackâdetermines the entire phallocentricity of the Freudian inscription of sexual difference hardly needs underlining, though Freudâs own italics place the emphasis there. Figuring sexual difference as a hierarchy of plus or minus underlines the castrating cost for women of âthe third stroke.â
But why the imbrication of sexual difference in the scene of writing? At the very point where the possibility of self-inscription arises, and with it the self-division and self-dispersal figured by writing itself, anxiety about sexual differentiation enters in. Freud implies that the difference between m and n only becomes significant (no longer âindifferentâ) for the boy at a later stage, when his sexual curiosity and desire have become aroused and focused on his aunt (an obvious mother substitute). But to write is already to have acceded to the inscription of sexual differenceâto the Oedipus complex and to the anxieties about loss of wholeness that Freud calls castration anxiety. La plume de ma tante, in Lacanian terms at least, would have it that all subjects are âcastrated,â whether avant or Ă la lettre, irrespective of anatomical gender. Inscription can never be regarded as indifferent, any more than the screen memories of childhood can. Rather, the scene of writing âscreensâ not only castration anxiety, but the differentiating ban on the mother and the traumatic discovery (for both boys and girls) that the mother lacks a penis. When it comes to the phallic signifier, lack is the lesson taught to all subjects. This anxious discovery is managed in Freudâs asymmetrical account by placing femininity on the side of lack, just as the stories boys tell themselves manage castration anxiety by projecting the loss of what they still possess onto what little girls have never had.
Freudâs overdetermined anecdote turns out to be an exemplary âmnemonicâ for the childâs passage through the Oedipus and castration complexes. The hidden story of screen memory is nothing other than the inscription of sexual difference. In this scene, the swift reconsolidation of masculine identity occurs by reference to a woman (an aunt) who stands in for the always-absent mother, and hence for the structure of oedipal desire (rivalry with the father for possession of the mother). The aunt lacks what the boy wants; she teaches him his own desire. At this point it may be instructive to follow Freudâs own trajectory in The Psychopathology of Everyday Life, moving via his preliminary âmnemonicâ (notice how aptly, by an accident of language, m and n figure in this term) to Freud himself. In his 1907 revisions to The Psychopathology of Everyday Life, the subject of screen memory initiates a series of autobiographical memories that uncover Freudâs own earliest childhood encounters with sexual difference. These recollections specifically concern his mother. Preceding the ostensibly âindifferentâ scene of writing by many years, they prove to be of particular significance for Freud himself, since they lead to the momentous âdiscoveryâ of the Oedipus complex on which Freudâs entire theory of sexuality comes to depend. In these autobiographical memories, what is forgotten or repressed, and thereby rendered âindifferent,â turns out to be not only sexual difference or the oedipal ban on desire for the mother, but theoretical desireâthe founding desire of psychoanalysis.
âShut up alreadyâ (words apocryphally attributed to the Jewish mother) could serve as a mnemonic for the repressed inscription of the mother in Freudâs writing. Desire for the mother must give way to the law of the Father in the Freudian account of the universality of the Oedipus and castration complexes. Yet these crucial âmemoriesâ reveal an intriguing interpretive structure. When the forty-two-year-old Freud turns to his (now elderly) mother for an explanation of certain childhood memories involving her and his old nurse, she provides unexpected illumination (âthrew a flood of light on the childhood scene,â as Freud puts it; SE 6.51). Her symbolic confinement, it turns out, has served to screen from memory her reproductive capacity, her maternal âconfinement.â âMotherâ becomes the name for closet-memory, in the sense that we speak of âcloset-dramaââthe unacted drama that has its life in the mind, or on the page of the unconscious where memories (whether of past or present) are inscribed. âMotherâ is the ostensible referent of these closet memories, yet it is only by making an extra-textual appeal to her as an entirely contingent witness that Freud is able to establish the universal structures at work in screen memory. What is the status of the mother? Is she a content, or rather, as he seems to imply, an interpretative structure? We might suspect that Freudâs mnemonic is a reminder, not of a âwhatâ (the mother) but of a âhowââthe process whereby sexual difference gets inscribed in the prehistory of the subject.
In a recollection that circumstancial evidence dates back to his third year, Freud sees himself âstanding in front of a cupboard [âKastenââ in his first translation, he calls it a wardrobe, âSchrankâ] demanding something and screaming, while [his] half-brother ⌠held it open. Then suddenly [his] mother, looking beautiful and slim, walked into the room, as if she had come in from the streetâ (SE 6.50). These, Freud makes clear, were his own words for describing the scene. He does not know whether his half-brother (his senior by twenty years) wanted to open or shut the cupboard, why he himself was crying, or what the arrival of his mother had to do with the brouhaha. Only after considerable analytic efforts does he bring to light the fact that he had âmissed his mother, and had come to suspect that she was shut up in this wardbrobe or cupboard.â When he discovers that the cupboard is empty, he begins to scream: âThis is the moment that my memory has held fast; and it was followed at once by the appearance of my motherâ (SE 6.50). How, Freud wonders, did the child get the idea of looking for his absent mother in the cupboard? The answer seems to lie in the dreams that Freud had during the period of self-analysis occupying him in 1897 and that he recorded in his contemporary correspondence with Fliess.
The...