CHAPTER I
[WAR always interested me: not war in the sense of manoeuvres devised by great generals ā my imagination refused to follow such immense movements, I did not understand them ā but the reality of war, the actual killing. I was more interested to know in what way and under the influence of what feeling one soldier kills another than to know how the armies were arranged at Austerlitz and Borodino.
I had long passed the time when, pacing the room alone and waving my arms, I imagined myself a hero instantaneously slaughtering an immense number of men and receiving a generalship as well as imperishable glory for so doing. The question now occupying me was different: under the influence of what feeling does a man, with no apparent advantage to himself, decide to subject himself to danger and, what is more surprising still, to kill his fellow men? I always wished to think that this is done under the influence of anger, but we cannot suppose that all those who fight are angry all the time, and I had to postulate feelings of self-preservation and duty.
What is courage ā that quality respected in all ages and among all nations? Why is this good quality ā contrary to all others ā sometimes met with in vicious men? Can it be that to endure danger calmly is merely a physical capacity and that people respect it in the same way that they do a manās tall stature or robust frame? Can a horse be called brave, which fearing the whip throws itself down a steep place where it will be smashed to pieces; or a child who fearing to be punished runs into a forest where it will lose itself; or a woman who for fear of shame kills her baby and has to endure penal prosecution; or a man who from vanity resolves to kill a fellow creature and exposes himself to the danger of being killed?
In every danger there is a choice. Does it not depend on whether the choice is prompted by a noble feeling or a base one whether it should be called courage or cowardice? These were the questions and the doubts that occupied my mind and to decide which I intended to avail myself of the first opportunity to go into action.
In the summer of 184- I was living in the Caucasus at the small fortified post of N-.]
On the twelfth of July Captain Khl6pov entered the low door of my earth-hut. He was wearing epaulettes and carrying a sword, which I had never before seen him do since I had reached the Caucasus.
āI come straight from the colonelās,ā he said in answer to my questioning look. āTo-morrow our battalion is to march.ā
āWhere to?ā I asked.
āTo M. The forces are to assemble there.ā
āAnd from there I suppose they will go into action?ā
āI expect so.ā
āIn what direction? What do you think?ā
āWhat is there to think about? I am telling you what I know. A Tartar galloped here last night and brought orders from the general for the battalion to march with two daysā rations of rusks. But where to, why, and for how long, we do not ask, my friend. We are told to go ā and thatās enough.ā
āBut if you are to take only two daysā rations of rusks it proves that the troops wonāt be out longer than thatā
āIt proves nothing at all.ā
āHow is that?ā I .asked with surprise.
āBecause it is so. We went to Dargo and took one weekās rations of rusks, but we stayed there nearly a month.ā
āCan I go with you?ā I asked after a pause.
āYou could, no doubt, but my advice is, donāt. Why run risks?ā
āOh, but you must allow me not to take your advice. I have been here a whole month solely on the chance of seeing an action, and you wish me to miss it!ā
āWell, you must please yourself. But really you had better stay behind. You could wait for us here and might go hunting ā and we would go our way, and it would be splendid,ā he said with such conviction that for a moment it really seemed to me too that it would be āsplendidā. However, I told him decidedly that nothing would induce me to stay behind.
āBut what is there for you to see?ā the captain went on, still trying to dissuade me. āDo you want to know what battles are like? Read Mikhaylovski Danllevskiās Description of War. Itās a fine book, it gives a detailed account of everything. It gives the position of every corps and describes how battles are fought.ā
āAll that does not interest me,ā I replied.
āWhat is it then? Do you simply wish to see how people are killed? ā In 1832 we had a fellow here, also a civilian, a Spaniard I think he was. He took part with us in two campaigns, wearing some kind of blue mantle. Well, they did for the fine fellow. You wonāt astonish anyone here, friend!ā
Humiliating though it was that the captain so misjudged my motives, I did not try to disabuse him.
āWas he brave?ā I asked.
āHeaven only knows: he always used to ride in front, and where there was firing there he always was.ā
āThen he must have been brave/ said I.
āNo. Pushing oneself in where one is not needed does not prove one to be brave.ā āThen what do you call brave?ā
āBrave? . . . Brave?ā repeated the captain with the air of one to whom such a question presents itself for the first time. āHe who does what he ought to do is brave/ he said after thinking awhile.
I remembered that Plato defines courage as āThe knowledge of what should and what should not be fearedā, and despite the looseness and vagueness of the captainās definition I thought that the fundamental ideas of the two were not so different as they might appear, and that the captainās definition was even more correct than that of the Greek philosopher. For if the captain had been able to express himself like Plato he would no doubt have said that, āHe is brave who fears only what should be feared and not what should not be fearedā.
I wished to explain my idea to the captain.
āYes,ā said I, āit seems to me that in every danger there is a choice, and a choice made under the influence of a sense of duty is courage, but a choice made under the influence of a base motive is cowardice. Therefore a man who risks his life from vanity, curiosity, or greed, cannot be called brave; while on the other hand he who avoids a danger from honest consideration for his family, or simply from conviction, cannot be called a coward.ā
The captain looked at me with a curious expression while I was speaking.
āWell, that I cannot prove to you,ā he said, filling his pipe, ābut we have a cadet here who is fond of philosophizing. You should have a talk with him. He also writes verses.ā
I had known of the captain before I left Russia, but I had only made his acquaintance in the Caucasus. His mother, Mary Ivanovna Khlopova, a small and poor landowner, lives within two miles of my estate. Before I left for the Caucasus I had called on her. The old lady was very glad to hear that I should see her āPashenkaā, by which pet name she called the grey-haired elderly captain, and that I, āa living letterā, could tell him all about her and take him a small parcel from her. Having treated me to excellent pie and smoked goose, Mary Ivanovna went into her bedroom and returned with a black bag to which a black silk ribbon was attached.
āHere, this is the icon of our Mother Mediatress of the Burning Bush,ā said she, crossing herself and kissing the icon of the Virgin and placing it in my hands. āPlease let him have it. You see, when he went to the Caucasus I had a Mass said for him and promised, if he remained alive and safe, to order this icon of the Mother of God for him. And now for eighteen years the Mediatress and the Holy Saints have had mercy on him, he has not been wounded once, and yet in what battles has he not taken part? ... What Michael who went with him told me was enough, believe me, to make oneās hair stand on end. You see, what I know about him is only from others. He, my pet, never writes me about his campaigns for fear of frightening me.ā
(After I reached the Caucasus I learnt, and then not from the captain himself, that he had been severely wounded four times and of course never wrote to his mother either about his wounds or his campaigns.)
āSo let him now wear this holy image,ā she continued. āI give it him with my blessing. May the Most Holy Mediatress guard him. Especially when going into battle let him wear it. Tell him so, dear friend. Say āYour mother wishes it.āā
I promised to carry out her instructions carefully.
āI know you will grow fond of my Pashenka,ā continued the old lady. āHe is such a splendid fellow. Will you believe it, he never lets a year pass without sending me some money, and he also helps my daughter Annushka a good deal, and all out of his pay! I thank God for having given me such a child,ā she continued with tears in her eyes.
āDoes he often write to you?ā I asked.
āSeldom, my dear: perhaps once a year. Only when he sends the money, not otherwise. He says, āIf I donāt write to you, mother, that means I am alive and well. Should anything befall me, which God forbid, theyāll tell you without me.āā
When I handed his motherās present to the captain (it was in my own quarters) he asked for a bit of paper, carefully wrapped it up, and then put it away. I told him many things about his motherās life. He remained silent, and when I had finished speaking he went to a corner of the room and busied himself for what seemed a long time, filling his pipe.
āYes, sheās a splendid old woman!ā he said from there in a rather muffled voice. āWill God ever let me see her again?ā
These simple words expressed much love and sadness.
āWhy do you serve here?ā I asked.
āOne has to serve,ā he answered with conviction.
āYou should transfer to Russia. You would then be nearer to her.ā
āTo Russia? To Russia?ā repeated the captain, dubiously swaying his head and smiling mournfully. āHere I am still of some use, but there I should be the least of the officers. And besides, the double pay we get here also means something to a poor man.ā
āCan it be, Pavel Ivanovich, that living as you do the ordinary pay would not suffice?ā
āAnd does the double pay suffice?ā interjected the captain. āLook at our officers! Have any of them a brass farthing? They all go on tick at the sutlerās, and are all up to their ears in debt. You say āliving as I doā. ... Do you really think that living as I do I have anything over out of my salary? Not a farthing! You donāt yet know what prices are like here; everything is three times dearer. . . .ā The captain lived economically, did not play cards, rarely went carousing, and smoked the cheapest tobacco (which for some reason he called home-grown tobacco). I had liked him before ā he had one of those simple, calm, Russian faces which are easy and pleasant to look straight in the eyes ā and after this talk I felt a sincere regard for him.
CHAPTER II
Next morning at four oāclock the captain came for me. He wore an old threadbare coat without epaulettes, wide Caucasian trousers, a white sheepskin cap the wool of which had grown yellow and limp, and had a shabby Asiatic sword strapped round his shoulder. The small white horse he rode ambled along with short strides, hanging its head down and swinging its thin tail. Although the worthy captainās figure was not very martial or even good-looking, it expressed such equanimity towards everything around him that it involuntarily inspired respect.
I did not keep him waiting a single moment, but mounted my horse at once, and we rode together through the gates of the fort.
The battalion was some five hundred yards ahead of us and looked like a dense, oscillating, black mass. It was only possible to guess that it was an infantry battalion by the bayonets which looked like needles standing close together, and by the sound of the soldiersā songs which occasionally reached us, the beating of a drum, and the delightful voice of the Sixth Companyās second tenor, which had often charmed me at the fort. The road lay along the middle of a deep and broad ravine by the side of a stream which had overflowed its banks. Flocks of wild pigeons whirled above it, now alighting on the rocky banks, now turning in the air in rapid circles and vanishing out of sight. The sun was not yet visible, but the crest of the right side of the ravine was just beginning to be lit up. The grey and whitish rock, the yellowish-green moss, the dew-covered bushes of Christās Thorn, dogberry, and dwarf elm, appeared extraordinarily distinct and salient in the golden morning light, but the other side and the valley, wrapped in thick mist which floated in uneven layers, were damp and gloomy and presented an indefinite mingling of colours: pale purple, almost black, dark green, and white. Right in front of us, strikingly distinct against the dark-blue horizon, rose the bright, dead-white masses of the snowy mountains, with their shadows and outlines fantastic and yet exquisite in every detail. Crickets, grasshoppers, and thousands of other insects, awoke in the tall grasses and filled the air with their clear and ceaseless sounds: it was as if innumerable tiny bells were ringing inside our very ears. The air was full of the scent of water, grass, and mist: the scent of a lovely early summer morning. The captain struck a light and lit his pipe, and the smell of his cheap tobacc...