CHAPTER ONE
Procrastination Is Genius in Disguise
Have you ever noticed that procrastination causes you pain? It hurts your heart, it hurts your self-esteem, it hurts your relationships, it hurts your career, and it hurts your income. And just as a pain in your body alerts you to something that needs healing, the psychic pain of procrastination can serve as an important wake-up call. That is why I call procrastination genius in disguise.
If procrastination didnât hurt, then you could put stuff off and then just la-di-da around all carefree and happy. But thatâs not the way it works â when you put off your projects, they become a weight on your mind and your heart.
So why is that genius?
Because the pain caused by procrastination reminds you that your projects are important to you. Procrastination is your friend, tapping you on the shoulder and saying, âHey, remember that idea you had? Remember how much you cared about it?â And pretty soon that voice is not just gently urging â itâs nagging. Loudly.
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So now you have a project that you know matters to you, and Iâm going to guess itâs mattered to you for a long time. After all this time, you are still thinking about it. It hasnât fallen away like some-things do â which is great news. The truth is, procrastination is persistent desire.
When your desire for a project stands the test of time, you can take that as a sign that your project truly is part of your lifeâs calling.
Whatâs Kept You from Moving Forward?
Youâve got a great idea that you know would make a difference in the world and itâs stood the test of time soâŚwhatâs the holdup? Why havenât you moved forward?
In my experience, there are three main reasons for getting stuck in procrastination.
Got Stuckified Reason 1: You Genuinely Donât Care about It
Maybe this project is really someone elseâs dream â a dream that your family or community placed on you â or maybe itâs an old dream that youâve outgrown.
Or perhaps itâs something you think you should do. I call these âshadow goals.â They look like goals, they sound like goals, but when you think about them they make you glum. Good goals are filled with energy and purpose â they may not always be fun, but they always contain some sense of joy. Shadow goals contain no joy but rather are burdened with guilt, ill feeling, futility, and even a bit of hopelessness.
For example, maybe youâre telling yourself something like, âI should really go and get my masterâs degree.â Chances are that if you have this idea and are not acting on it, you donât really care about a masterâs; you care about whatever you think having a masterâs will gain you: âIf I got my masterâs in film I could write that screenplay Iâve had in my head.â I say skip the masterâs and go directly to writing the screenplay.
Itâs also possible that you have outgrown this dream. It may be that while the fourteen-year-old version of you really wanted to be a rock star, the forty-four-year-old version doesnât actually care that much for the spotlight. If you are a sentimental person, you may feel itâs unduly harsh to give up this particular project, because it may feel as though you are giving up on your dream. Allowing your old dreams to grow and change to better suit your true, current self is both practical and wise. Or to think of it another way, you wouldnât put your fourteen-year-old self in charge of your other life decisions now, would you?
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Got Stuckified Reason 2: It Just Hasnât Been the Right Time
Maybe it hasnât been the right time because of life circumstances, such as a new baby in the family or a health issue or a financial crisis. Or maybe it hasnât been the right time because you havenât been ready. Maybe youâve had life lessons to learn or some spiritual maturity to attain.
Or maybe itâs that mysterious right-moment thing that people bring up when youâre looking for the perfect life partner. âWhen the time is right, he/she will show up,â those well-meaning people say. Irritating. Even more irritating, they are often correct.
Or maybe youâve needed to wait for some technology to be invented, or youâve needed to wait for the right people or the right partner. But whatever the reason: it just hasnât been the right time. And I know that for a fact because if it had been the right time, you would have done it.
After all, look at all the things youâve accomplished. Youâre no slacker. You work hard, and youâre so tenacious that others have probably expressed concern about your tenacity.
Got Stuckified Reason 3: Youâre a Little Bit Scared
Or a lot scared. To which I say, âWell, of course youâre scared!â
Creating art is scary. Starting any new venture is scary. And putting your heartfelt work out into the world is downright terrifying. Anybody who claims otherwise is a big, fat liar. People tell me every day about the projects theyâre stuck on, and they are doozies. Hereâs a sample of some of the projects people have told me about:
       Writing a memoir
       Clearing up personal financials
       Relearning quantum physics
       Getting certified in a healing modality, such as massage, Reiki, Emotional Freedom Technique, or spiritual psychology
       Balancing parenthood and art
       Orchestrating a live event or conference
       Getting a pilotâs license
       Living oneâs highest purpose
       Doing stand-up comedy
       Clearing out a parentâs house
       Staying in touch with friends and colleagues
       Growing a business
       Finding true happiness
       Writing a book proposal
This is some big, life-changing stuff, and itâs no surprise that it hits your panic button and makes you want to run and hide like a little kid.
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I Know What I Need to Do â I Just Canât Make Myself Do It
Hereâs an example of the kind of letter I frequently receive from my clients:
Hereâs what I would say to Elizabeth, and to you, since chances are fairly high you are dealing with the same concerns:
Rest easy, honey â you are merely suffering from a biological imperative called âdisplacement activity.â Displacement activity is what happens when an animal is in the grip of two conflicting instincts, and so it enacts a third, seemingly inappropriate behavior.
For example, youâve probably seen a chimpanzee being challenged by another chimpanzee. When the first chimp doesnât know whether to run away or fight, he might scratch his headâŚyawnâŚlook awayâŚstart grooming himself. Seems like a very passive response to aggression, but that chimp will do anything to deflect the energy, avoid making a decision, and otherwise make himself as invisible as possible.
When you have the instinct to create and you simultaneously have the instinct not to create, your fear says, âDonât do it!â And so, confused by these two equally strong instincts, you shut down and get stuck playing an online word game for hours on end.
Sometimes years.
It doesnât mean you have low self-esteem, and it doesnât mean your dream is impossible, and it certainly doesnât mean youâre lazy. So the next time this happens, just recognize the dynamic without yelling at yourself. âAh,â you might say instead, âI appear to be having the instinct to create something. And I also find myself feeling afraid of what will happen if I create that thing. Perfectly natural. But my fear does not get to make my decisions for me. So I will now set my kitchen timer for fifteen minutes and just play around with my creative idea in a light, fun, beta-testing sort of a way and then see what happens.â
And thatâs what this book is all about â giving you the loving encouragement you need to move forward. And maybe a little loving thwack upside the head.
Weâll talk more in the next chapter about how to choose the right project, but hereâs a good shorthand tip: If you have lots and lots of ideas, you may want to pick one using the same method some people use to pay off their credit cards. That is, either pick the one thatâs closest to being done and finish that one, or pick the one that has the highest âinterestâ rate and finish that one.
Fifty years from now, the details that you are worrying about will not matter one whit. But the art you create, the novel you write, the doll you sew, the dance you perform, the photograph you take â that will still be making a difference in the world.
ACTION STEP
Spend fifteen minutes right now playing around with your favorite project.
CHAPTER TWO
Which of Your Thirty-Seven Projects to Tackle First?
You have so many great ideas, and you canât decide which one(s) to follow through on. Or maybe once you finally settle on one and get into it, you get bored and drop it like a hot potato for something new. I know.
One of the side effects of being a creative genius is that you have a billion great ideas and a lot of skills and talents, so it can be difficult to figure out where to focus. This is so often what happens: You get a brilliant idea. It appears instantly â so full and rich and detailed and vibrant inside your mind â and you just know it...