Recalling Our Own Stories

Spiritual Renewal for Religious Caregivers

Edward P. Wimberly, Tapiwa N. Mucherera

• Publisher: Fortress Press
• Year: 2019
• Print ISBN: 9781506454771
• eBook ISBN: 9781506454788
• Topic: Theology & Religion
• Subtopic: Christian Ministry

How religious caregivers can find spiritual renewal in their own story Recalling Our Own Stories, which author Edward P. Wimberly describes as "a spiritual retreat in book form, " is designed to help clergy and religious caregivers face the challenges of ministry. It is also a valuable resource for practitioners who assist these clergy and caregivers in meeting the challenges of their work. Wimberly enables caregivers to map out and come to grips with cultural expectations of their profession. He also helps readers explore and edit the mythologies that make up their self-image, attitudes toward others, expectations about their performance and role, and convictions about ministry. Finally, he provides a model for spiritual and emotional review grounded in narrative psychology and spiritual approaches. As Wimberly explains, this book offers a way to renew our motivation for ministry by reconnecting to our original call, visualizing again how God has acted and remains intricately involved in our lives. Wimberly demonstrates how religious caregivers, often facing burnout, can tap the sources of renewal that reside in the faith community.

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Index

abuse: and good girl myth, 33–35; and sense of powerlessness, 27–30; and underfunctioning, 95–98

acceptance: and grace, 11, 28, 172–73; of personal identity, 152

Achtemeier, Paul J., 145, 205

Acts 25:13–26:32, 3

affection, myth of unlimited, 49, 64–66

African American spirituality, model of spiritual renewal in, 4

African Americans: good girl myth among, 33–34; matriarch image among, 90; sense of powerlessness in, 28–29; womanist images among, 90

Agrippa, King, 3

aloofness myth, 40–41; and self-sufficiency myth, 84, 88–91, 177–80

Anderson, Stephen A., 22–23, 52–53, 110

anger, buried, 154, 179, 182; acceptance of, 183

anxiety: and conflict, 54; in reauthoring process, 110, 202

assessment. See mapping and assessing

attributions, 105–7, 112, 129

attunement. See empathy

authority, 33–34, 84, 97, 100, 165, 181, 200

authority exercise, 100

Bagarozzi, Dennis A., 22–23, 52–53, 110

Berger, Peter L., 105

birth mythologies: and call to ministry, 2–4, 12, 14–15, 18, 112, 145, 153, 158–60, 172–73, 177, 193; in examples, 31–32, 70, 132, 148–49, 155; in family mythology, 51–82; in ministerial mythology, 83–101; in personal mythology, 21–47

birth mythology exercise, 43–44

birth order, 23, 129, 132–33, 148–50, 155

birth order exercise, 44

boundaries: in caregiver relationships, 9, 40, 76, 96; in family of origin, 29

Bowden, John, 145

Bowen, Murray, 85, 205

Burden, Susan L., 52, 117

burnout: and negative myths, 50; and pleasing others, 95; and sole responsibility myth, 34, 36; and spiritual renewal, 1, 5

call exercise, 99

call to ministry: biblical tradition of, 145; divine versus family-of-origin sources of, 145; narrative story and, 6–7; and personal identity, 152; as project of existence, 6–7; reconnecting with, 1; reconnecting with, in case examples, 142, 172; reconnecting with, in community of colleagues, 4; problem of perfection and, 8–12; sacrificing joy and, 91–93, 184, 194; self-sacrifice and, 153, 158; self-sufficiency and, 88–91; sole responsibility and, 36–37, 146–47; women and, 153, 158–59, 173; wounded healers and, 15

Calvinism, 92

capitalism, 92

caregivers: bonding among, 192; “three families of,” 54–55. See also ministerial myths; ministry

catastrophic expectations, 94

challenge, and envisioning transformation, 106–7

change, first versus second order, 116. See also transformation

childhood, loss of, 37, 56. See also premature adult responsibility

childhood experiences, 23, 41, 103, 186, 193; and origin of personal myths, 25, 84. See also family of origin

Cinderella, 63

Clinebell, Howard, 8, 205

clinical pastoral education (CPE), and vulnerability, 12, 35, 87–88, 185, 189

closeness: and myth of aloofness, 40; and myth of the loner, 31

cognitive narrative structures, 51

Columbus, Christopher, 107

Columbus risk, 107

community of colleagues, reviewing call to ministry with, 4

Constantine, Larry L., 165

contraction phase, 70

Corey, Gerald, 94, 205

counseling, need for, versus retreat model of reauthoring, 118. See also marital counseling; pastoral counseling

crisis, and transformation, 174

cross-generational expectations, 155

cross-generational themes, 47, 202

Damascus Road, 3

dire consequences myth, 50, 73–75, 77, 94

discernment stage, of reauthoring personal myths, 113, 137–38, 151, 157. See also liminality

disciple role, moving to steward role from, 124

discipline exercise, 45; in example, 134–35

dissociation, 139

divorce and remarriage, symbolic, 116

Doehring, Carrie, 9–10, 19, 96, 205

dreams, 184, 187–89

dual relationships, 76

earliest memory exercise, 43; in examples, 131–32

emotional investment, 55, 61, 63–64

empathy: childhood experience of, 24; “good enough,” 11; myth of perfect, 8–9, 84

entitlement myth, 97

environment for reauthoring, 109

Epston, David, xiv–xv, 103, 107, 112

Erickson, Beth M., 34, 36, 205

Everett, Craig A., 116

exercises: authority exercise, 100; birth mythology exercise, 43–44; birth order exercise, 44; call exercise, 99; earliest memory exercise, 43; gender and sex exercise, 44; getting the most from, 198–200; ideal-child image exercise, 80; ideal mate/marriage image exercise, 79; ideal-parent image exercise, 81; in marital and family mythology questionnaire, 43–46, 78–82; in ministerial mythology questionnaire, 99–101; names and nicknames exercise, 44; parental/school discipline exercise, 45; parents’ relationship exercise, 46; peer and sibling relationships exercise, 45; in personal mythology questionnaire, 43–46; plots exercise, 101; roles exercise, 45, 100; self-differentiation exercise, 100; self-e...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title Page
• Copyright
• Dedication
• Table Of Contents
• Foreword
• Preface
• To Be Called Anew: Finding Spiritual Replenishment in Our Own Stories
• Personal Myths: Stories That Empower Us or Leave Us Vulnerable
• Marital and Family Myths: Stories That Affect Our Relationships with Loved Ones
• Ministry Myths: Stories That Help or Hinder Us in Serving God
• The Possibility of Change: Reauthoring the Myths That Bind Us
• Suzanne: Allowing the True Self to Surface
• James and Hope: Understanding Who Called Us to Ministry
• Blanche and Henry: Seeing Our Spouses for Who They Are
• Zelda and David: Seizing the In-Between Moments When Change Is Possible
• From Walking Wounded to Wounded Healer: What to Expect on the Journey
• References
• Index
• The Author