This Beautiful Village

Lisa Tierney-Keogh

• Publisher: Oberon Books
• Year: 2019
• Print ISBN: 9781786828293
• eBook ISBN: 9781786828309
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Social Sciences
• Subtopic: Violence in Society
• Index: Social Sciences

On a quiet suburban street in Dublin, a piece of graffiti tears apart a group of neighbours, exposing a deep divide between them. In one long scene over one night, six people must confront their pride, privilege and prejudice. Who will concede power and how will they move forward? Power will be undone. It won't be pretty. But it could be beautiful.

BEGINNING

Pre-show music plays.

The audience enter and take their seats in the auditorium.

Low and subtle, we hear the sound of a fly.

It builds.

Here, now there, the sound is quiet, but persistent enough to believe there is a fly in the theatre.

As lights go down, “Little Boxes” by Malvina Reynolds, plays.

SCENE ONE

Lights up on a living-room with modern, tasteful decor. The house is a classic South County Dublin estate build from the 80s: perfectly functional and nothing special. There are oddities of decoration, like strange art and ornaments.

LIZ (Irish, white, late-30s,) stands statue still, listening. Slowly, painfully slowly, she raises a fly-swat. She steps towards a noise in one place, stops. She steps towards a noise in another place, stops.

A speedy, erratic blue-bottle has her demented. LIZ is focused on its demise in a zen-like state. Peppered with her short moves left and right, to and fro, are dramatic slaps of the fly-swat onto a surface, followed by one word from her: ‘bastard!’

There is a window STAGE LEFT in the room. LIZ has her back to it.

A face appears in the window. MAGGIE (Irish, white, early-60s) stares in and watches LIZ, amused, enthralled. LIZ turns, sees MAGGIE, and jumps with fright.

LIZ: JESUS CHRIST!

LIZ doubles over to catch her breath from the shock. She exits and returns with MAGGIE, who carries two bottles of wine.

MAGGIE: Did you get him?

LIZ: No. Gone quiet now, hiding somewhere. He got in earlier when I put the washing out. Wily little fuck.

MAGGIE: Give that to me (Beat.), I’m good with flies.

MAGGIE takes the fly swat and assumes the ready position with an aggressive vigour.

Silence.

MAGGIE leaps, swats down hard.

MAGGIE: I got him!

LIZ: Where?

MAGGIE: Right there.

LIZ: That’s a piece of dust.

MAGGIE: No! On the bookshelf, right there.

They both step in closer for an examination, like scientists in a lab.

LIZ: I don’t see it.

They are silent.

Pause.

The blue-bottle comes at them again.

LIZ: Bastard!

MAGGIE: Have you spray?

LIZ: I don’t.

MAGGIE: Or deodorant. Just to slow him down.

LIZ exits and returns with a can of spray deodorant and hands it to MAGGIE, who presses on the nozzle in short bursts, sharply, in different directions.

MAGGIE: C’mere to me you ye little bollix.

LIZ: He’s there!

MAGGIE: Where?

LIZ: There!

MAGGIE: Here?

LIZ: Get him!

MAGGIE smacks the fly-swat on the couch.

LIZ: Watch the couch, I just had it cleaned!

MAGGIE goes still again. LIZ stands close to her, their backs to upstage. They are laser focused on the fly.

MAGGIE: You have to think like a fly.

LIZ: Channel my inner blue-bottle?

Their voices are low now.

MAGGIE: Look at him. Rubbing his front legs together, thinks he’s great. (Pause.) You’ve met your match, ye little feck. It’s curtains for you.

They are stiller than before, silent. MAGGIE slowly raises the swat above her head.

LIZ: Careful now...

MAGGIE: Easy does it..

PHILIP (Irish, white, 50-ish) enters the living-room unseen and unheard, carrying a bottle of wine.

As MAGGIE stealthily moves in for the killer blow, PHILIP sneaks up behind them.

LIZ: I believe in you, Maggie...

In the split second MAGGIE moves her hand, PHILIP shouts loudly behind them, scaring the living shite out the two women:

PHILIP: YOU CAN DO IT, MAGGIE!!

MAGGIE and LIZ scream, jump out of their skins, giving PHILIP immense enjoyment.

PHILIP: Did you get him?

MAGGIE: Jesus, Mary and holy Saint Joseph and all the angels and saints, Phil, you put the heart across me.

LIZ: Does nobody on this road ring a doorbell anymore–

PHILIP: –I couldn’t resist it ladies.

LIZ: Is it 7.30 already?

PHILIP places his bottle of wine on a table with other bottles and glasses and snacks.

MAGGIE: I think you just took five years off my life–

PHILIP: –I’ll take that.

He takes the fly-swat from MAGGIE.

PHILIP: No. See, these ones are shite.

He swats it through the air like a sword, arrogantly. LIZ rolls her eyes in a familiar fashion.

MAGGIE: I had him, Phil, I was that close–

PHILIP: –You need one of those ones with the flexi-grip. These are –

LIZ: –Shite, yeah, you said.

MAGGIE: I’ll open the window. He’ll go out of his own accord.

PHILIP: With an all-day fresh body odour that won’t let him down.

MAGGIE: My god but you’d need a drink after a fright like that.

MAGGIE opens a bottle of wine and pours three glasses.

MAGGIE: Liz?

LIZ: I can’t drink right now, I’m too... I’m up here...I need this to go smoothly–

MAGGIE: –Phil? You’ll have one.

PHILIP: Go on, so–

MAGGIE: –I’ve been off red during the week but sure I’ll make the exception for tonight, as a neighbourly ...

Table of contents

• Front Cover
• Half-Title Page
• Title Page
• Copyright Page
• Dedication
• Contents
• Characters
• Beginning
• Scene One