Chekhov's First Play

Dead Centre

• Publisher: Oberon Books
• Year: 2016
• Print ISBN: 9781783197576
• eBook ISBN: 9781783197583
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Literature
• Subtopic: British Drama
• Index: Literature

'I'm having absolutely nothing to do with the theatre or the human race. They can all go to hell.' – Anton Chekhov During the turmoil of the Russian Revolution in 1917, Maria Chekhov, Anton's sister, placed many of her late brother's manuscripts and papers in a safety deposit box in Moscow. In 1921 Soviet scholars opened the box, and discovered a play. The title page was missing. The play they found has too many characters, too many themes, too much action. All in all, it's generally dismissed as unstageable. Like life. A new play by Dead Centre, creators of the OBIE / Fringe First winning LIPPY.

PART ONE

As they enter, the audience are each given a set of headphones.

Curtain.

The Director enters, holding a gun, stands in front of the curtain. He is dressed as himself.

The Director. (Whispers into microphone.) Hello. I’m the director. Thanks for coming to – (Out loud, off mic.) Oh, you need to put your headphones on in order to hear me. (Back to microphone, whispers.) Hello. I’m the director. Thanks for coming to tonight’s performance of Chekhov’s First Play. Let’s start by doing a quick sound check: you should be hearing this in your left ear (they should) and you should be hearing this in your right ear (they should). Our production manager will swap them out if anyone has a faulty set.

You’re probably wondering why you’re wearing headphones. Well, I did a version of this show last year and it went OK, but, talking to people afterwards, it became clear they didn’t really get it, they didn’t really understand what I was trying to do. And that’s understandable because Chekhov’s first play is really complicated and messy … so I thought I’d set up a director’s commentary to explain what’s going on, what it’s about, and why you should like it. Personally, I always need things explained to me, especially art. I’m the kind of guy who goes to an art gallery and spends all the time reading the writing on the wall next to the paintings. I hardly ever look at the paintings.

And a lot of theatre, too, can feel complicated and inaccessible, especially these old plays, the classics. But they’re worth doing. They tell us so much about the world we live in now, they ask the big questions: who am I? What kind of a society do I want to live in? What do I want?

Chekhov was nineteen when he wrote this and, as you’ll see, it’s not a very good play, but it’s hugely ambitious. It’s like all his other plays were in there waiting to get out, all his ideas. This gun, for example. This gun’s very important. I don’t know if you’ve heard of the idea of ‘Chekhov’s gun’ – it’s the idea that if you have a gun in a play … if you … if there’s a gun then you fire it … erm … actually I’ll explain that later … erm …

So, hopefully this commentary will make things clearer.

OK, I’ll be offstage so I won’t distract you, I’ll just be a voice in your head. If you’re anything like me you already have a voice in your head anyway, so tonight you’ll have two. Hope it’s not too strange. It can feel a little intimate. Like even though everyone can hear this, it feels like I’m just talking … to you.

Looks at single audience member.

How are you? Comfortable? Make yourself at home. You know, a theatre seat actually is a kind of home. I found this out the other day. It’s legally your private property for the duration of the performance.

Pointing gun at audience member.

That’s why, even if you hadn’t turned up tonight, I couldn’t re-sell your ticket, as that seat is, legally, yours.

Taking gun away.

And property, of course, is one of Chekhov’s main themes … See, that’s the sort of thing I’ll be doing throughout the commentary, unpacking key themes, making connections … And I know this microphone is very sensitive, so I’m sorry if you can hear me breathing, it’s a bad habit of mine.

Let’s get started.

Goes to leave but then stops.

And I recommend keeping the headphones on, but if there’re any members of the audience who are comfortable with the classics, feel free to take them off at any point and enjoy the play, as Chekhov intended.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Chekhov’s First Play.

He retires offstage with the microphone. Until further notice, all his lines are delivered via the headphones. The audience can also hear the “play” through their headphones, amplified from the stage.

Curtain opens.

Music.

A country house estate. Russia, 1878.

Outside the house, a long table.

A warm day. A beautiful naturalistic setting. Birdsong in the headphones.

ANNA seated at the table, her back to the audience.

Pause.

The Director. OK. So. The play is set in Russia. 1878. This is the country estate of Anna Petrovna, widow to General Voinitsev. She inherited this big house from her late husband and is now struggling to keep up the payments. So, you see we already get the theme of property in the stage setting, even before anyone speaks.

She puts her head on the table.

Oh and please don’t be put off if the actors don’t look at you, that’s just them staying in character.

A fly buzzes in the headphones, left ear, then right ear.

ANNA waves her hand. The fly buzzes off.

The buzzing returns, left ear, then right ear, very close, then stops.

ANNA swats it against her neck.

The Director. So life-like. I love real life. The detail.

TRILETSKY enters holding the gun.

The Director. And that’s Triletsky, a friend of Anna’s, and a doctor.

TRILETSKY moves towards ANNA, points the gun at her head.

The Director. Ah, yes. So let me explain ‘Chekhov’s Gun.’ It’s the idea that if you put a gun on stage in the first act, it must be fired –

TRILETSKY. What’s the matter?

The Director. I’ll explain later.

ANNA. Do we matter?

TRILETSKY. What?

ANNA. I have a feeling that we don’t any more.

Taking gun away.

TRILETSKY. Let’s have a smoke! My flesh is itching for a smoke. For some reason I haven’t had a smoke since this morning.

TRILETSKY lights up. He coughs but recovers himself.

The Director. There’s a lot of smoking in this play. They didn’t know about cancer.

TRILETSKY. Why are you looking at me like that? I’ll be fine. I get a cough every winter, autumn and spring, and on damp days in the summer. In any case...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Title Page
• Copyright
• Contents
• Characters
• Part One
• Part Two
• By the Same Author