Mentoring Mindset, Skills and Tools

Make it easy for mentors and mentees

Ann Rolfe

• Publisher: Mentoring Works
• Year: 2020
• eBook ISBN: 9780980356441
• Edition: 4
• Topic: Business
• Subtopic: Mentoring & Coaching
• Index: Business

Everything you need to know and do to make mentoring work!

Mentoring Mindset, Skills and Tools is written for both for mentors and mentees, so you can literally be on the same page. It is based on decades of experience and explains the essential ingredients of mentoring conversations and relationships that work.

In this book you'll discover:

·What mentoring is and isn't and the differences between mentoring and coaching

·Mentor and mentee roles and responsibilities

·A framework for the mentoring process

·How to start, maintain and end and effective mentoring relationship

·What to do to build trust and rapport

·Ways to lead learning and strengths-based development

·Practical tips, guides, activities and templates

The proven techniques have been used in mentoring for professionals, graduates and students inhealth, construction, energy, communications, education, law and government.

Author, Ann Rolfe has spoken international conferences in Australia, Canada, China, The Philippines, Singapore and USA. Her regular webinars attract participants from around the world.

Part I

Part 1 Mentoring Defined

1

Why Be or Have a Mentor?

The world is changing around us at a speed never seen before. Transformation disrupts whole industries. New technologies wipe out jobs, and new ones emerge. A new generation enters the workplace where elders stay on, if they can. There is no status-quo. We worry:

• How do we keep up?
• Will we adapt?
• Can we have fulfilling, ongoing careers?

We have so much information at our fingertips. We are drowning in data, buried by information overload. We can gather knowledge from search engines and know-how from YouTube. We are force-fed opinions and skewered by facts (alternate or otherwise)! We may be left wondering:

• How do we make sense of it all?
• To what practical use can we put it?
• Where do we gain insight?

We are learning more about the brain. Neuroscience reveals stunning complexity. What we once thought of as the seat of logic and rational thinking, we now discover is ruled by emotions. Hair-trigger reactions flying down neural pathways combine with pre-programmed personality to stimulate behavioural responses.

• How do we relate to one-another?
• What does it take to communicate?
• Can we learn to manage ourselves?

One-on-one and in groups, mentoring conversations help us discover our own answers to these and many more questions and challenges. Mentoring helps us develop personally and professionally and grow as human beings.

Benefit of Mentoring

If you have ever had a good mentor, you know the value of having a person who asks questions that make you think, someone who listens without judging you. Who will, if you ask, offer their opinion or ideas but makes sure that you make your own decisions about what you want to do. Here’s what some mentees said about their experience:

“Amazingly positive. I’m more confident.”

“I now believe in myself, trust my own judgment.”

“I didn’t know I needed a mentor, but now I know it’s not just about getting advice and I see what I’ve been able to do, I’d recommend it to anyone.”

What do Mentors get out of it?

Most mentors have altruistic motivation; they volunteer to mentor for personal satisfaction, the desire to assist others, or the wish to give something back. We should recognise and acknowledge the generosity of people who mentor. However, mentors often tell me they feel they gain as much from mentoring as do the people they mentor. Senior managers said of their experience as mentors:

“The myth that the mentee does all the learning is wrong.”

“I was inspired. It was life-changing, a very personal experience, and I gained a new perspective on many things.”

“It was a chance to develop a relationship with a person you might never otherwise interact with.”

The main aims of workplace mentoring are personal, professional, and career development for the mentee. Yet mentors report that they enhance their communication, become better leaders and develop their own career skills because of mentoring others. Some management development programs require participants to mentor others as part of their own professional growth process.

Both mentor and mentee develop as a result of the conversations you have. Your personal and professional growth builds organisational capability.

Tacit Knowledge

You will tap into tacit knowledge. That means drawing out knowledge, understanding and wisdom underlying the experience that you and your mentoring partner have. For organisations, this is a vital hidden resource.

Many organisations use mentoring for knowledge management, recognising that the implicit knowledge in experienced workers’ heads is too valuable not to pass on. For mentors, mentoring is a better way to “know what you know”. Sharing knowledge with someone else deepens your understanding and appreciation of your own expertise. Mentees learn why and how certain actions produce outcomes. Questions help you re-examine and perhaps change what you know.

Wellbeing

Much more attention is being paid to well-being at work and people are more aware of the importance of relationships and communication in reducing stress. Neuroscience is identifying ways to create and strengthen neural pathways and stimulate growth in parts of the brain vital to mental health. They have shown that the act of giving (or even observing someone else give, or help another) stimulates areas of the brain that release the feel-good chemical dopamine.

Mentoring does more than make people feel good. It provides a timeout for thinking and reflecting. It encourages creative and critical thinking, goal setting and planning. You learn to be present, to listen consciously, to ask good questions, all attributes that can improve the quality of your life. Connecting, building relationships, and the thought process used in mentoring contribute your well-being. This can add to organisational productivity.

Perspective

Developing a relationship with someone you might not otherwise meet, someone older or younger, from another part of the organisation or in some other way different from you, expands your perspective. Scientific research is now showing that difference, dissent and discordant ideas make us smarter!¹ By listening to someone else, you will gain a new perspective. Seeing more than one point of view increases the intelligence you bring to any situation.

Mentoring builds the confidence to acknowledge differences and respectfully disagree. It reduces resistance and defensiveness and allows you to explore ideas dissimilar to your own. This can produce more harmony, creativity, and productivity.

Activity: What Do You Want From Mentoring?

Tick any that apply to you and add your own ideas to the list.

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Mentees

• Discover and develop your talents and skills
• Discuss your career aspirations and options
• Set goals and strategies for achieving them
• Receive feedback on your ideas
• Receive encouragement and support
• Tap into informal communication channels
• Learn the “unwritten rules”
• Gain a new or different perspective
• Identify strengths and explore potential
• Raise your profile within, or outside of, your organisation
• Be challenged, use talents...

Table of contents

• Title Page
• Copyright
• Contents
• Foreword
• Introduction
• I. Part 1 Mentoring Defined
• II. Part II The Mentoring Process
• III. Part III Mentoring Mindset
• IV. Part IV Skills
• V. Part V Mentoring Tools and Guides
• Notes
• About the Author