Dignity

Seven Strategies for Creating Authentic Community

Beth-Sarah Wright

• Publisher: Church Publishing
• Year: 2020
• Print ISBN: 9781640653337
• eBook ISBN: 9781640653344
• Topic: Theology & Religion
• Subtopic: Christian Church

DIGNITY is a transformative set of ideas to help individuals and communities identify and address barriers to authenticity.

The author was inspired by a question in the Episcopal Baptismal covenant: Will you strive to respect the dignity of every human being? DIGNITY is seven actionable tenets (diversity, identity, growth, nurture, integrity, transparency, and yield) with which we can identify our purpose, articulate our aspirations, and equip ourselves and others for both the opportunities and challenges of honoring this covenant. They are prompts to be reflective about who we are and what we value.

This practical guide will help the spiritual community bridge the gap between where we are, and where we want to be. For we know that "you can develop a healthy and robust community that lives right with God and enjoy its results only if you do the hard work of getting along with each other, treating each other with dignity and honor" (James 3: 17).

PART 1

THE STORY:
AN INSTITUTIONAL TALE

POINTS OF VIEW

Jehan, the Student

Could my senior year of high school begin any better? The director of student life and engagement just asked me to read a passage in the upcoming first ever all-school assembly! I was so excited to be a part of it. In addition to planning for senior week and my last homecoming and all the “lasts” I was about to experience this year, here was a “first” and it was like icing on the cake. It was an honor to be asked to participate in a school event, but to be asked to read a passage from my family’s holy book, the Quran, made it all the more special.

I always loved sharing parts of my life that my friends at school rarely saw or knew about. I loved sharing my mother’s delicious Persian food and I loved teaching a word or two of Farsi to my friends. I remembered back in tenth grade, in our World Religions class, the whole class visited several holy places of worship: Christian churches, a Jewish temple, and a mosque in the city. I had only attended the mosque a few times in my life, but I was familiar enough with it to have some inside knowledge to share. I was so proud and excited to share what I knew, from how to put on the scarves to cover our heads and shoulders to how to kneel and pray. And now, to share this part of me and my family with my friends and the entire school was a thrill. I decided I would not only read the passage in English but read it in my parents’ language of Farsi as well!

But first I had to translate it. I called my aunt first, because I knew she was very spiritual and would help me with an accurate translation. We worked on it for a few hours and I practiced to get the pronunciations correct. Even though I grew up hearing and speaking Farsi at home, English is my first language so I wanted to be sure I was saying the words correctly, not that many people would understand what I was saying! As far as I knew, my family were one of very few Persian families at school. I may look different from most of the students there, but this was my school, my home. Even being one of very few Muslims at this private school was not an issue. I grew up here—I attended this school since I was four years old. I may have been in the ethnic minority, but I always felt like I belonged. This school was my family.

We had never had an all-school assembly before. Ms. Sofia told me she wanted the assembly to be both entertaining and thought-provoking. A time for us to think ethically and to celebrate values that connected us, not that divided us. We always said we were an inclusive school, and that we had created an environment where everybody was valued, affirmed, and included, so the idea of this all-school assembly sounded right. In fact, one of the rules for the student clubs at our school was that they could not be exclusive; everyone had to have the option to join. Even though we were not a religiously affiliated school, we had guest speakers in our classes sometimes, a rabbi or a Baptist minister, and we recognized when our friends were celebrating Rosh Hashanah or Hanukkah, and they were invited to share their family traditions with the class. I didn’t think anything of it to be invited to read from the Quran at this assembly.

I felt so proud of my school to be asked to read from the Quran in the midst of what the world seemed to be thinking about Muslims. You couldn’t turn on the television or listen to the radio without hearing something about the “Muslim ban” or that Muslims were hate mongering or violent and that beheadings were a part of the faith. I personally didn’t feel questioned about my faith at school, as many of my friends and teachers probably didn’t even know or care that my family was Muslim. I still felt a certain pride, though, in being able to celebrate this part of me with my school family. Of all places, this was the safest and most accepting place to do this.

I walked to the lectern that day, armed with the confidence I had practiced each word and I could practically recite the passage by heart. The words were so beautiful, lyrical and full of meaning. “So, compete with each other in doing good. Every one of you will return to God, and God will teach you about the differences of humanity. . . .” They rolled off my tongue with the ease of exhaling. Like a sweet breath, they floated into the air and landed on the ears of my friends and teachers—people I had known almost all my life. I would never have imagined in a thousand years, after I stepped down from that lectern, the cruel and hurtful words that flew in my direction and how quickly those people would change how they saw me after those four minutes of our lives together.

Sofia, the Director of Student Life and Engagement

I left my new boss’s office feeling so empowered and focused on the task at hand. This was only my second month in this position as the director of student life and engagement, a position that called for me to oversee student activity and engagement and to help cultivate a learning community where each student felt they truly and fully belonged, without leaving any part of themselves outside of these doors. The most involved aspect of this work was to conceive of weekly assemblies and programming, including this new all-school assembly of fourteen hundred students from three-year-olds to high school seniors. I was determined and excited to make this a success. To prepare, I sat with the head of school to get a sense of his vision for the initial gathering: to create an event that celebrated our school identity and embraced and affirmed the rich diversity in the student body. Simple, right? Yes, but also a great challenge. I would never have anticipated the firestorm that was about to be ignited by the simple choices we made to accomplish the stated mission.

The mission of our school had always been clearly articulated to me. In my job interview, I answered many questions about how to navigate ensuring all students were included and able to flourish. How would you cultivate an environment where all students are affirmed and included? How do you include the Hindu student, affirm the physically disabled student and celebrate the Asian American student? How do you create an inclusive space where all feel a sense of belonging? This intentional hospitality and welcome was evident in all the literature the school shared with prospective families and on their website. Regardless of my familiarity with this worthy aspiration, planning this service still presented new territory for me. How do I elegantly include a celebration of diversity into this assembly to create an entertaining, provocative, and school-spirited experience? My first draft was sent back to me for revision. It leaned too heavily on the school’s historical traditions and did not yet reflect the affirmation of some newer narratives of inclusion and affirmation. This happened not once, not twice, but three times! I really appreciated the intentionality. It just wasn’t enough to say it: the assembly had to reflect it.

I admit I was stumped at first. Then Jehan stopped by my office to ask about a homecoming event she was planning and the lightbulb exploded! As she was talking, I noticed her bracelet with a crescent and star symbol on it. I asked if she was Muslim and when she said yes, it all came together in my head. Have a few students share something from their faith—especially students of the three Abrahamic faiths, Christianity, Islam, and Judaism, which share the same root. That seemed a great way to have the students more involved and to raise up some values that connect us. It just opened up the possibilities. Jehan’s excitement and enthusiasm was tremendous. I reworked the draft and this time, it was approved. Yes, it captured the essence of the school mission. Yes, it was a celebration and reflection of our diverse student body. Yes, it was all this and yet, it was a minefield of explosives I never anticipated.

Susan, the Parent

What has happened to my school? It’s been nearly fourteen years now that my children have attended here. Fourteen years of volunteering endlessly in the parents’ association. Fourteen years of enduring painfully long carpool lines on hot afternoons and frigid mornings. Fourteen years of annual tuition raises and annual fundraisers. I’d do it all over again because I love this school and the education it has given my children, but after yesterday’s all-school assembly, my love for this school has been challenged in ways I hadn’t thought possible.

I sought out this school for my first child because it captured all I hoped for in an educational environment. I wanted a sense of community with like-minded friends. A place where my children would be known and nurtured as they matured academically and socially. I wanted a place that fostered decent, good kids, who were respectful and kind. And I wanted a school with some spiritual or character-building component. This school was not religiously affiliated, but it did focus on the social and emotional development of students. It offered opportunities for them to develop and mature into good citizens, good human beings, the values that we tried to instill in our home. I wanted a school that spoke about values and ethics and making good choices. It was simple, really, and I have been more than happy with the ways in which the school has achieved this. Happy up until yesterday when I was completely dumbfounded by the choice to include a reading from the Quran at the assembly.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not intolerant of different faiths. In fact, I’ve known the young lady who read at the assembly since she was in preschool. She is friends with my daughter. I knew her parents were Middle Eastern but I did not know they were Muslim. Why would the school put Jehan in such an awkward situation? And who is this new director of student life anyway? What was she thinking? Why is she trying to change the nature of this school? To read from the Quran in a traditional Judeo-Christian school in the United States? Why? Why would they do that? Jehan is of course free to practice her own faith but why here? Why now? Why in this school? Why must we be exposed to a belief so different from what the majority of us believe as Christians? A faith that espouses violence and terrorism? As a country, we are already making a statement about this faith and its practitioners right now with the executive order. And here at my children’s school we are going in a completely different direction . . . actually embracing and extolling this religion. Don’t they remember 9/11? I am completely astounded and frankly angered by the whole thing.

There is a time and a space for the study of different religions. I am not against that at all. Creating an inclusive environment for the students is a noble undertaking, but the means by which this goal is being pursued by this director of student life and administration is deeply flawed. When did it become acceptable to include readings from the Muslim faith in a gathering with impressionable children? What about our youngest children who lack the cognitive ability to discern what is happening? How are they supposed to know what is the truth and what is not? What about them?

Is this what the administration believes must be done to create an “inclusive and welcoming” environment? I know we are a welcoming environment. As a practicing Christian, I have never felt excluded at this school that does not espouse any particular faith. Each year, a few new students are admitted who come from different schools and areas and backgrounds. I know we have a financial aid program—I think I even contribute to that each year. We are an inclusive and welcoming school. But to have our children exposed to this religion in a traditional school is ridiculous and misinformed. To be exposed to readings affirming beliefs of Islam? Is this where we’re headed? Soon our children will be reciting and singing songs from all these traditions . . . Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, New Age, even atheism!

This is truly unacceptable. I know other parents have the same concerns. I must get to the bottom of this abrupt and secretive agenda by the school leadership to implement these new changes and ultimately shift this school from its Judeo-Christian roots to one that embraces all religions without thought. And if they don’t stop this nonsense now, I will contemplate leaving this school.

Derek, the Teacher

It was supposed to have been a glorious coming together of the entire student body and faculty in our inaugural annual all-school assembly. I couldn’t believe it took such a negative turn. It’s all my eleventh-grade Religion class wanted to talk about today. The energy was palpable. Their usual apathy had been replaced with a fierce urgency to discuss the incidents of the day before. Many of them sat at their desks straining like bulls waiting for the buzzer to sound and the bucking chute gate to fling open. Their euphemistic question: Should readings from any religious text—for example, the Quran—be included in all-school assembly? Their actual question: Why is our school changing so drastically and trying to shove Islam down our throats?

How was I going to have this class discussion in light of what I had witnessed yesterday? The surprise. The looks of disgust. How was I going to control the blazing temperature in the room? In the classroom were seventeen-year-olds who had gone home the day before to their predominantly white, Christian, conservative-leaning, and wealthy homes and to parents who no doubt had something to say about what went down at the assembly. Now, they were charged up and ready, alongside the very student who had read a passage from the Quran, her family’s religious text, at the school’s invitation no less. A student who had been at this private school since pre-kindergarten, surrounded by friends she’d known almost all her life. Some in support of what happened. Others confused and angry. I didn’t know what would happen if I opened the doors for conversation in the classroom. The emotions. The rhetoric. The blame. Would they offend her? Her parents? Would they be unkind?

I have been a teacher at this school for many years without this sort of issue presenting a problem. To discuss issues like these in the abstract was one thing, but to face the raw reality of it right here in the classroom was something altogether different. Not coincidentally, the cloud of opinions about the recent presidential Executive Order 13769, popularly known as the Muslim ban, hung heavy in the air. I didn’t know how much of my own feelings I could contain. Should I share what I feel? I still had a responsibility to teach this class in the midst of all this and I was feeling overwhelmed. I felt unprepared and to say I was uncomfortable was an understatement. Honestly, I...

Table of contents

• Cover Page
• Title Page
• Copyright
• Dedication
• Contents
• Foreword
• Introduction: A New Way of Seeing
• Part 1: The Story: An Institutional Tale
• Part 2: The Dignity Lens: Seven Strategies
• Summary
• Epilogue: What about Me? Imagine Your Life Based on DIGNITY