The Big Mama Collection: Sparkly Green Earrings / The Antelope in the Living Room / Nobody's Cuter than You
eBook - ePub

The Big Mama Collection: Sparkly Green Earrings / The Antelope in the Living Room / Nobody's Cuter than You

  1. 720 pages
  2. English
  3. ePUB (mobile friendly)
  4. Available on iOS & Android
eBook - ePub

The Big Mama Collection: Sparkly Green Earrings / The Antelope in the Living Room / Nobody's Cuter than You

About this book

This collection bundles all 3 of popular author Melanie Shankle's previous books together in one e-book, for a great value!

Sparkly Green Earrings
"There is really no better indicator you're a mother than acquiring the ability to catch throw-up in a plastic bag, disinfect your hands, and immediately ask your friend to pass the beef jerky as you put on another Taylor Swift song and act as if nothing has happened." This is the type of insight Melanie Shankle offers in this quirky memoir of motherhood.

Written in the familiar, stream-of-consciousness style of her blog, Big Mama, Sparkly Green Earrings is a heartwarming and hilarious look at motherhood from someone who is still trying to figure it all out. Filled with personal stories—from the decision to become a mother to the heartbreak of miscarriage and ultimately, to the joy of raising a baby and living to tell about it—Sparkly Green Earrings will make you feel like you're sitting across the table from your best friend. A must-read for anyone who's ever had a child or even thought about it.

The Antelope in the Living Room
Welcome to the story of a real marriage.

Marriage is simultaneously the biggest blessing and the greatest challenge two people can ever take on. It is the joy of knowing there is someone to share in your joys and sorrows, and the challenge of living with someone who thinks it's a good idea to hang a giant antelope head on your living room wall.

In The Antelope in the Living Room, New York Times best-selling author and blogger Melanie Shankle does for marriage what Sparkly Green Earrings did for motherhood—makes us laugh out loud and smile through tears as she shares the holy and the hilarity of that magical and mysterious union called marriage.

Nobody's Cuter than You
There is nothing as precious in life as a friend who knows you and loves you in spite of yourself. Yet over the last couple of decades, we've substituted the joy of real friendship with cheap imitations. We settle for "community" on Facebook and Twitter and a series of text messages that allow us to communicate with someone without the commitment. We like each other's beautifully filtered photos on Instagram and delude ourselves into believing we have a community. But real friendship requires effort. It's showing up, laughing loud, and crying hard. It's forgiving and loving and giving the benefit of the doubt. It's making a casserole, doing a carpool pickup, and making sure she knows those cute shoes are 50 percent off. Written in the same comedic style as the New York Times bestsellers Sparkly Green Earrings and The Antelope in the Living Room, Nobody's Cuter than You is a laugh-out-loud look at the special bond that exists between friends and a poignant celebration of all the extraordinary people God had the good sense to bring into our lives at exactly the right moments. From the friendships we develop over a lifetime to the ones that wounded us and the ones that taught us to love better, Melanie Shankle reveals the influence our friends have on who we were, who we are, and who we will become. And on a day when our jeans feel too tight, our chins have decided to embrace hormone-related acne reminiscent of our teen years, and our kids have tested the limits of our sanity, they are the ones who will look at us and say, "Nobody's cuter than you!"

Information

Year
2017
eBook ISBN
9781496420862

Table of contents

  1. Cover
  2. Praise for Melanie Shankle
  3. Copyright
  4. Contents
  5. Sparkly Green Earrings
  6. Dedication
  7. The Book of Dreams
  8. Chapter 1: Death, Taxes, & Motherhood
  9. Chapter 2: Eight Pregnancy Tests Later .Ā .Ā .
  10. Chapter 3: The Worst Summer Ever
  11. Chapter 4: In the Ghetto
  12. Chapter 5: Shamu & the Chicken Spaghetti
  13. Chapter 6: I Wanted My Epidural in the First Trimester
  14. Chapter 7: Straight from Heaven
  15. Chapter 8: That Time I Didn’t Sleep for Four Years
  16. Chapter 9: War Buddies
  17. Chapter 10: Back to Work, Back to Reality
  18. Chapter 11: Potty Training: Bringing People to Their Knees Since Forever
  19. Chapter 12: We Don’t Throw Sand
  20. Chapter 13: Letting It All Hang Out
  21. Chapter 14: I Can No Longer Bring Home the Bacon
  22. Chapter 15: Putting the Crazy on Display
  23. Chapter 16: Lifestyles of the Sick & Feverish
  24. Chapter 17: Nitpicking
  25. Chapter 18: Ready for the World
  26. Chapter 19: The Big, Bad World of Elementary School
  27. Chapter 20: It’s a Party & I’ll Cry If I Want To
  28. Chapter 21: One Isn’t Always the Loneliest Number
  29. Chapter 22: Brothers from Another Mother
  30. Chapter 23: Like a Band of Idiots We Go down the Highway
  31. Chapter 24: The Dream of the Wheaties Box
  32. Chapter 25: Adorable Cookie Salesperson in Polyester
  33. Chapter 26: Caroline, the Witch, & the Wardrobe
  34. Chapter 27: Little Steps of Letting Go
  35. Acknowledgments
  36. The Antelope in the Living Room
  37. Dedication
  38. The Importance of Being Antelope: AĀ Prologue
  39. Introduction: ErringĀ onĀ the SideĀ ofĀ Love
  40. Chapter 1: Warm Heart, Cold Salad Bowl
  41. Chapter 2: The Art of Kissing Frogs
  42. Chapter 3: White Lace and Promises and Cake
  43. Chapter 4: The Day After
  44. Chapter 5: Young Love and Old Love andĀ aĀ Rat
  45. Chapter 6: The Great House Search
  46. Chapter 7: We Make Dave Ramsey Sad
  47. Chapter 8: Home Improvement
  48. Chapter 9: In Sickness and in Health
  49. Chapter 10: Nilla Wafers Aren’tĀ aĀ Food Group
  50. Chapter 11: That Time I Almost WentĀ on Judge Judy
  51. Chapter 12: Root, Root, Root for the Home Team
  52. Chapter 13: The Couple That Shops Together Has My Sympathies
  53. Chapter 14: And Baby Makes Three
  54. Chapter 15: I Would Do Anything for Love, but I Won’t Shoot That
  55. Chapter 16: Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough or the Feds Show Up
  56. Chapter 17: The Twisted Gift of the Magi
  57. Chapter 18: Frigidaire Will Be SoĀ Envious
  58. Chapter 19: Because Innuendo Is the Sincerest Form of Flattery
  59. Chapter 20: In-Laws and Outlaws
  60. Chapter 21: Skeletons and Grace
  61. Chapter 22: Deck the Halls
  62. Chapter 23: The Antelope in the Living Room
  63. Chapter 24: Coming Home
  64. Acknowledgments
  65. Nobody's Cuter than You
  66. Author’s Note
  67. Dedication
  68. Introduction
  69. Chapter 1: Diamonds Sometimes Really AreĀ a Girl’s Best Friend
  70. Chapter 2: When We Were Young
  71. Chapter 3: Happy Campers
  72. Chapter 4: The First Cut Is the Deepest
  73. Chapter 5: The Chapter with More than Its Share of ’80s References
  74. Chapter 6: The Knitting of Souls
  75. Chapter 7: The Fantastic Four
  76. Chapter 8: The Importance of Showing Up
  77. Chapter 9: All That Glitters Is Not Gold
  78. Chapter 10: Whatever You’ve Done, Whatever You’ve Become
  79. Chapter 11: An Ode to Citronella, WhyĀ IĀ Don’t Camp, and the EndĀ of an Era
  80. Chapter 12: Let Sleeping Friends Lie
  81. Chapter 13: I Just Found Out There’s Such aĀ Thing as the Real World
  82. Chapter 14: Wiping Tears and Bottoms
  83. Chapter 15: Living Life to the Realest
  84. Chapter 16: Ain’t No Party like aĀ Wrapping Party
  85. Chapter 17: The Road Goes On Forever and the Party Never Ends
  86. Chapter 18: Going through the Big C —and IĀ Don’t Mean Chocolate
  87. Chapter 19: The Wonder of It All
  88. Appendix 1: The World according toĀ Gulley and Mel
  89. Appendix 2: Thirty-Seven Reasons toĀ Love Mel
  90. Appendix 3: So You Want to Take a Road Trip
  91. Appendix 4: Ten Characteristics ofĀ aĀ Best Friend
  92. About the Author

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