Life Is a Journey, Not a Race

An Invitation to Pause and Ponder

S. B. Sia

• Publisher: Resource Publications
• Year: 2022
• Print ISBN:
  9781666737714
  9781666797466
• eBook ISBN:
  9781666797473
• Topic: Philosophy
• Subtopic: Mind & Body in Philosophy

Life presents us with challenges as well as opportunities. It confronts us with obstacles as we journey on, but it also offers us various pathways and routes that we can take. Comparing our life-journey to the travels we make in life, this book is an invitation to readers to face up to those challenges and to meet them through a series of reflections called "comma-moments": the chance to "stop momentarily and mull things over," or to "create space in time" as they go about the business of living from day to day. Like commas in a sentence, which help us to read and interpret its meaning properly, a life punctuated with short reflective breaks enables us to draw out its meaning and significance. Drawing on his vast educational background and diverse global travels, the author shares with readers some "thoughts for food" while on our life-journeys. These reflections, as well as anecdotes and stories, also avail themselves of the real-life experiences of others and the wisdom of many contemporary voices and historical figures throughout the world, especially those who have been concerned with the kind of reflection that will help as we move on in life. In particular, it discusses a conceptual life-map to aid us navigate our way in life and to step up to its challenges.

Stage Five

Taking Stock

9

Co-Travelers

Companions or Competitors?

Going on a journey is usually a pleasurable experience. There is so much to see no matter where one goes. In fact, it is quite common to talk of a trip of a lifetime, the expectation being that it would be most enjoyable and truly memorable and that it would be to some longed-for destinations. That enjoyment is enhanced when there are others also traveling with us, particularly if they share our interests and plans. We can then relish the travel experience and celebrate our togetherness as well.

In contrast, traveling on one’s own can be a lonely experience. Unlike business trips which are planned to achieve something and hence, often more convenient on one’s own, vacations, pleasure trips, tours and so on are quite group-oriented. Of course, it may suit certain individuals, particularly the more adventurous type to go solo. But somehow those traveling alone miss out on a valuable aspect of the travel. While sometimes decision-making is made easier if one does not have to be bothered consulting anyone else, it also means that there is no one with whom to share the excitement of the trip, the grandeur of the sights, the pleasure of the experience and the camaraderie of one’s companions.

This is one reason why a journey differs from a race despite the presence of others; that is to say, fellow-runners. There is obviously company, too. But the main rationale of racing is to be competitive and to defeat the others. Reaching the finishing line first involves beating the other competitors. In such a situation one is very much focused on the task ahead. One wants to outdo the others. In this sense, the more one knows the weaknesses of the competitors, the more one can capitalize on these so as to surpass them. Rivalry is rife, and the other runners are there to be beaten. The thrill of the race becomes more intense the more one nears the finishing line—which necessarily involves outdoing the other competitors.

There is something in this comparison that can be a lesson for life and how we live it. As we continue with our reflections on our life-journey, we now turn our attention to those traveling with us, no matter who they are. If we regard life as a race, then these others are competing with us. They are our rivals, and the more we outrun them the better we will feel. On the other hand, if life is a journey, then they are our companions. We share the world with them, and we help one another out.

So to what extent are our co-travelers in life companions or competitors? In what sense is traveling alongside one another in life a matter of sharing with, rather than outdoing, one another? Is it a matter of being “near rather than merely next” to one another? What does it entail? Does it mean we need always to walk at the same pace to move on?

Suppose we pause for a few moments before proceeding to explore those points. Some youthful experiences and lessons I had will, hopefully, refresh us during this momentary stop.

An enjoyable experience for me during the summer months was attending foreign language schools in continental Europe, particularly Germany, Austria and Spain. Not only was it a break from the pressures of academic work required by the university, it was also a change in routine. Of course, the main thing at these language courses was still academic work. After all, there were the classes to attend, assignments to fulfill, and language labs to visit. Some of these courses are intensive, and so more learning has to be squeezed into such a short period of time. And being in the country where the language that one is learning is spoken is also the chance to imbibe its culture firsthand—and that requires some time, too.

But such language courses had another attraction as far as I was concerned: the opportunity to meet students from various parts of the world. The international nature of these courses meant that sometimes one would be meeting a participant from a country unfamiliar to me, and it would be a novel experience. Others would, of course, have hailed from better known nations.

What turned out to be an even more enjoyable and equally fruitful experience were the sessions outside the classroom: whether it was the cafés, the walks, the evening get-togethers that some of us would organize by ourselves and for ourselves. We wanted the time to be enjoyable as well! What was singularly interesting was that at such language courses sometimes the only way to chat, exchange views, share jokes and pursue other activities together had to be conducted in the language that we were studying. That meant that we were learning one another’s grammatical mistakes! But it was fun, and we managed to form friendships that way. It was always a diverse group, and the nature of the grouping enhanced our enjoyment.

As I reflect on those summer months, when I traveled to a foreign country to study the language spoken there, I came to realize that the objective of learning the foreign language was at the same time the opportunity to experience diversity. The participants were all individuals from different backgrounds, and yet we were enjoying one another’s company because of our common goal. We studied, we did our assignments, we attended classes; but we also found time to enjoy our togetherness.

The first group of activities at the language institute necessitated individual work, but the second kind called for some bonding and relishing one another’s company. In fact, that enjoyment was due to, when I think about it now, our diversity: culture, language, interests and other factors. It was the common goal of studying the language that brought us together in the first place but it was our diverse composition that united us during the time we spent there. Since then I have had numerous exposures to and experiences of dealing with a diverse body of students, people and professionals; but that youthful experience still stands out in my memory and probably formed a certain outlook on my part.

One would hardly credit that kind of experience as significant as one journeys through life. Yet it was, because it was a chance to realize that we were not competing with one another as in a race but rather that we were accompanying one another to reach our common goal. Instead of hindering our progress—and enjoyment—our different backgrounds provided the setting for commonality.

In contrast, at times in life in our rush to get ahead or to the top, we brush against each other, we shove and push, we step on one another, and some even trample rivals down figuratively if not literally. That period of study during the summer months showed that differences, in whatever form they are, do not have to set us apart. They do not have to have to be discarded, either. In fact, they also contribute to making the experience even richer as I learned in no small way in the company of a diverse foreign-language student body.

The summer months as a student also provided me with the opportunity to travel farther afield. A new experience for me then was the train journeys on the continent of Europe. One particularly enjoyable route, as far as I was concerned, was the train journey from Düsseldorf to Stuttgart, both in Germany. At that time, it was the scenic route along the River Rhine that captured my imagination, particularly the old castles visible across the body of water. It was one of those journeys where one could spend the hours of traveling just looking out of the window.

I had the same experience when, instead of flying, I took the 7-hour train journey from New York to Vermont in the USA. The chance of seeing the autumn foliage en route was too irresistible for me. I was certainly rewarded as the changing and colorful landscape along the route was truly spectacular. Instead of turning to my reading material, I simply gazed at the passing scenery in awe throughout the journey.

Several years later, on various train journeys in different countries I still have the habit of looking out of the train window to catch a glimpse of the passing scenery. This time, however, the added years in my age made me more reflective. On one occasion on a train journey in Poland I noted that the seat arrangement on the train gave two passengers the choice of sitting next to each other or facing one another. That may not be a particularly eye-catching observation. But as I watched my fellow passengers, I noticed that those seated together were catching the view of the outside world from the same perspective whereas in the case of those facing each other, one would see the view as it was about to pass by whereas the other would catch a glimpse of the same view after the train had passed it. Two different but compatible views of the same reality. Differing perspectives yet a certain commonality.

It seems as if because of where we are, we differ on how we see the world. But it is the same world; and it is the same object of attention, even if it is observed from diverse angles. Yes, sometimes even a mundane train journey can teach us that we can converse, see the views, and share experiences despite looking out from our respective positions. In fact, sometimes the differences in what one sees or had failed to see can liven up the conversation. Similarly, in our journey in life, there are different angles from which to view the surrounding world, and they do not have to mar the journey itself. They do not have to detract from the specificity of the perspective either.

Another wonderful chance afforded to me on train journeys in continental Europe was the experience of crossing borders. At that time, there were passport checks—this was pre-Schengen—and that can be a nuisance as it causes delays and not a little anxiety. The thrill, however, was crossing into another country with a different language, currency (before the euro, that is), culture, and people. It was like setting foot in a new world.

On one occasion, my companions and I hopped off the train in Hendaye, France, having secured our hostel accommodation there because we wanted to explore the surrounding are...

Table of contents

• Title Page
• Introduction
• Stage One: Getting Our Bearings
• Stage Two: Surveying the Terrain
• Stage Three: Making Our Way
• Stage Four: Staying on Track
• Stage Five: Taking Stock
• Journey’s End
• Afterword
• Selected Bibliography