Written in an accessible and humorous style, this book teaches you to know what's going on in your mind and how to get your feelings under control. It'll help you adapt and feel better about your place in the world. Psychologist Gwendoline Smith uses her broad scientific knowledge and experience to explain in clear and simple language what's happening when you are feeling overwhelmed, anxious and confused.
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Topic
Personal DevelopmentSubtopic
Mental Health & WellbeingCHAPTER ONE
I never quite made it to the Philosophy Department at university. A psychology major allowed me more time to pursue my other passionâplaying eight-ball.
In recent years, since studying cognitive behavioural psychology, I have become quite keen on a guy called Socrates. I would have to say he is my favourite philosopher. He was saying really interesting stuff way back in circa 470 bc. (Yes, long before the internet.)
He was committed to the concept of reason. He believed that, properly cultivated, reason can and should be the all-controlling factor in life. Not surprisingly, being such a pioneering and brilliant mind, he was sentenced to death by poisoning, because of his refusal to acknowledge the gods recognised by the state and for his supposed âcorruption of youthââI would have referred to it as enlightenment!
Socrates was probably the most extraordinary mind of the time. He was responsible for the conception of the Socratic dialogue, his method of teaching. He never wanted to âteach atâ his students. That would be to instil doctrine. His pet hate.
Instead, he wanted to guide his students to discover their answers for themselves. He did this through a method called âSocratic questioningâ which set out to uncover assumptions and unexamined beliefs, and then to think about the implications of those beliefsâall this to really test whether the answers made sense.
This form of questioning became the backbone of law studies (and Suits script writers) and was later picked up by the world of psychotherapy, including cognitive behavioural therapy, in the 1960sâwhich is how I became interested in the technique.
As prescribed by Socratic dialogue, I focus on the âWhen?â, âWhat?â, âHow?â and âWhere?â questions in my clinical work. I choose not to delve into the âWhy?â question because in my experience it often leads down a path that goes both everywhere and nowhere:
The key message here is that you need to, and can, learn to adapt. On the evolution of species, Charles Darwin is often described as saying, âOnly the fittest survive.â What he was actually saying was, âThe most adaptive survive.â
Look at cockroaches. They have been around for 320 million yearsâthey watched the dinosaurs come and go. They are still with us today, and apparently resistant to every new insect spray on the market. Now thatâs adaptive!
CHAPTER TWO
When Iâm teaching I like to start off with the diagram opposite. This is a very standard template that explains the basis of cognitive behavioural therapy and how it all works. It is simple and in its simplicity lies Aaron Beckâs genius. I describe it this wayâI hope Dr Beck would approve.
The first thing to remember is that our heads are attached to our shoulders. Not only that, but the brain is in charge of everything. Itâs not called the âheadquartersâ for nothing.
All of our physical sensations (body), everything we do (behaviour), everything we feel (mood) and our thinking (mind) are all inextricably linked to the brain. And all of these interact with the world around us (environment).
We could say, âI am a brain,â but humans prefer to say, âI have a brain,â hanging on to the belief that the âIâ is the self, and the self is a separate entity. This separate entity is where the soul supposedly livesâthough that debate would require another book.
BODY
This is our physiology, everything to do with the body. Everything we can see: legs, hands, toes, breasts, teeth, etc. Then there is everything that we canât see: hormones, neurotransmitters, chromosomes, biochemicals, DNA and so on. All of our physiology is at our fingertips, and yet there is so much we donât know about it.
The illustration opposite shows how the body responds when under alert, or the âsurvival responseâ. When faced with a perceived threat, your body prepares you to either go on attack (fight), run away (flight) or try to make yourself invisible (freeze). This is the same response that occurs when humans describe feeling anxious.
Some of the physical reactions that can occur as part of your bodyâs âsurvival responseââpreparing you to fight, flee or freeze.
If you become unwell, for instance with the flu, you experience all the physical symptoms associated with it: sneezing, coughing, nose running, head blocked (body). In response to this, you probably go to bed and rug up (behaviour).
Then, lying in bed and not being able to get out and do the things you enjoy, you start to feel miserable (mood). Sometimes, while lying there, you also start to think about what youâre missing out on (FOMO) and how none of your friends have come to visit you. Your emotions can be impacted further, making you feel even more miserable (mood).
Hopefully you are starting to see what I mean about everything being inextricably linked.
BEHAVIOUR
Letâs use exercise as an example. Letâs say you like to go for a run or go to the gym several times a week. One day, while out running, you sprain your ankle and have to have it strapped up (body). This means no exercise for some time. You may start to worry that you are going to get fat and out of condition (mind). These thoughts can then create discomfort and/or anxiety (mood).
When you exercise, your body releases biochemicals called endorphins, which have a positive effect on your feelings. Because you are not running, you are not getting those endorphins or any of the other physical benefits of exercise (body), and you worry that you are going to turn into a fat slob (mood).
MOOD
In the developed world we are becoming increasingly obsessed with mood. We have lists of all sorts of possible mood disordersâanxiety, depression, bipolar, to name but a few. Pills to take you up, to take you down, to level you out, to take the edge off. Name it, there is undoubtedly a pill for it.
This is not a new thing. Most cultures have long had drugs to help people alter their state of consciousness and, in turn, their emotions: these include opium, peyote, marijuana, LSD, alcohol, tobacco and many more. It is a very, very long and ancient list. However . . .
Making billions out of the manufacturing of pharmaceuticals and criminalising what comes out of Mother Natureâs garden is new.
The other manifestation of our fascination with all things emotional is the arts: love poetry, melancholic poetry, music about love and loss, more loss and more love, novels, painting, comedy, dance. The wonderful world of the arts.
I love all of these aspects of life, but the scientific reality is that emotions are about neurotransmitters and hormones...
Table of contents
- Cover
- Title
- Copyright
- Contents
- Authorâs Note
- Introduction
- Chapter One: Figuring things out AKA Philosophy
- Chapter Two: Itâs all connected
- Chapter Three: Simple as ABC
- Chapter Four: The part reality plays
- Chapter Five: Thought content
- Chapter Six: How to recognise a thought virus
- Chapter Seven: What now? How does all this theory work for me?
- Chapter Eight: Skills from the cognitive tool kit
- Chapter Nine: More helpful stuff
- Chapter Ten: Which track would you choose?
- Chapter Eleven: Winding down
- In the End
- Great minds that I have quoted
- Glossary
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