Contents
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
CHAPTER THIRTY
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
AUTHORâS NOTE
CHAPTER ONE
October 1988
BLESS.
Much later, when Ăli was an American with an American name, that was the one Icelandic word that he would remember. Bless. Goodbye.
Bless, Mamma.
He followed his mother out of the church by his grandparentsâ farm, trying desperately not to cry. Ăli was ten and he was terrified. On one side of the tiny churchyard, right next to the turf wall that enclosed it, lurked an open hole. Ăli had watched the men digging it two days before, struggling with the stone and the frost-hardened earth. The pallbearers carried his mother towards the hole.
The church was far too small to hold everyone who had come, but the priestâs booming voice had easily carried out to the gathering of the sad, the respectful and the curious who stood outside. The priest had a big beard, a big ruff around his neck, a big belly and a big rich voice of authority. He told everyone what a wonderful, beautiful and good person Ăliâs mamma was. Ăli knew all that to be true. But he was glad the priest didnât mention the shouting, the falling, the slurring, the throwing up.
The crowd formed around the hole in the ground, Ăli right at the front. He wanted to cry; he wanted so desperately to cry. He also wanted to pee; why hadnât he gone to the toilet before? How had he been so stupid? He had wet his sheets for the previous two nights, as he knew he would. He couldnât pee his pants at his own motherâs funeral, could he?
He reached for his big brotherâs hand. Ăli was too old to hold hands, but he didnât care and, if he did it stealthily, Afi wouldnât notice. MagnĂșs gripped his brotherâs fingers in his own. Ăli looked up at him. MagnĂșs was two years older and fifteen centimetres taller than Ăli. He was standing straight, chin out, mouth firm, eyes dry.
Afi had told them not to cry and snivel. And Ăli always, always, did what Afi said. MagnĂșs disobeyed him sometimes and got beaten for it. Ăli seemed to get beaten anyway.
The pallbearers, including Ăliâs three uncles, were lining up his mother above the hole. A puffy black cloud rolled away from the sun, which shot pale beams onto the damp grass. A pair of eider sped low over the gathering, a duck and a drake, swerving and squawking in surprise at encountering so many humans in such an empty land. Ăli glanced up at the farm, his home, his prison for the last four years, nestled against a steep snow-capped fell and a waterfall. The tiny wooden church lay between the farm and the sea, Breidafjördur â Broad Fjord â with its countless islands. And to the east lay the lava field, a kilometre wide. The fell, the fjord and the lava were the walls to Ăliâs prison.
His mother was steady now, above the hole. The priest intoned some words. Ăli glanced across at his afi. To Ăli his grandfather was old â he was over sixty, after all â and his hair was thin and white. But the farmer stood up straight; he was sturdy and strong, as was his face, etched by the gales flung at him over decades by the Atlantic. The corners of his mouth pointed down and his flinty blue eyes stared at Ăliâs mother.
Then Afi blinked, and Ăli saw a tear, or half a tear, wriggle its way through the wrinkles on his grandfatherâs cheek, and slink beneath his white shirt collar.
That was it; the tears flooded from the little boyâs eyes. But Ăli stood straight. He sniffed, suppressed a sob, somehow managed to restrain himself from flinging his body on to the ground, or at his mother, or into the hole, from screaming, No, no, no!
MagnĂșs squeezed Ăliâs hand. His cheeks were still dry.
They lowered the coffin. The family threw handfuls of cold damp earth on top of Ăliâs mother. MagnĂșs stepped forward, but thankfully no one thought to force Ăli to move. As MagnĂșs returned to his position, Ăli reached for his brotherâs hand again, damp and gritty with the soil.
MagnĂșs stiffened. He was facing the far side of the churchyard. There a man stood alone: a tall man with a fair beard.
âItâs Pabbi!â MagnĂșs whispered.
Ăli felt a surge of joy. He had noticed the man earlier, but he hadnât recognized his own father. Ăli hadnât seen him for four years, since the age of six, when his father had disappeared to America, leaving his wife to the bottle and his sons to their grandparents. But in an instant the joy was replaced by fear. Afi would be cross. Afi would be furious.
âCome on,â MagnĂșs said, tugging Ăliâs hand.
Ăli let MagnĂșs go. He wasnât that dumb.
MagnĂșs walked over to the man, their father, and hugged him. The manâs face, which had been sombre, broke into a wide grin. The manâs glance turned up from his eldest son and searched out Ăli. For a moment their eyes met, and Ăli felt a warm feeling seep through him.
Then he turned away. The idiot! Didnât Pabbi know what he was doing? There was going to be big trouble. Big, big trouble.
Sure enough, there was. Afi noticed Ăliâs flinching. He spotted the stranger with his grandson. The lines by the side of Afiâs mouth plunged even further downwards, and his face set into a glare of pure hatred as he strode over to man and boy.
Ăli sought out his biggest uncle, Kolbeinn, and stood behind him, watching in dread.
Afi grabbed MagnĂșs and tore him away. He then began haranguing his son-in-law. The crowd fell silent, straining to hear, but the breeze was blowing away from them and they could make out very little. Ăli thought he heard the words âkilled my daughterâ. That wasnât right, surely? His mother had driven herself into a rock while drunk. Then he heard his own name and that of MagnĂșs.
The man, the stranger, his father, said little. He stood firm, listening, and then shrugged and turned, hopping over the turf wall to avoid pushing his way through the crowd by the white churchyard gate.
Ăli watched his father walk away, wondering when, if ever, he would see him again.
As soon as he got back to the farm at Bjarnarhöfn from school the next afternoon, Ăli went out to the chickens. They were allowed the run of the farmyard, but they sheltered in an old Eimskip shipping container, around the back of the farmhouse. He liked all the chickens, but his favourite was a small black hen called Indiana. Or at least Ăli called her Indiana, after Indiana Jones whom Ăli had watched agog on two occasions at the cinema in StykkishĂłlmur. Amma thought Indiana was a stupid name for a chicken, and called the hen something else, but Ăli stuck with Indiana. Ăli knew and the chicken knew it was her name.
He was worried about Indiana. She hadnât laid anything for several weeks now, and Amma had a strict rule: if a hen didnât lay, it wasnât worth feeding. Ăli had started switching eggs around, but he knew that ploy wouldnât last for long. His grandmother was sharp-eyed when it came to chickens, even if she didnât seem to notice what happened to Ăli and MagnĂșs in her own house. And once she realized that Ăli had been deceiving her, Indianaâs days were over.
Ăli had felt lousy at school all day. Not that there was anything wrong with school; he much preferred being there to being home. The other kids occasionally teased him, but Ăli could usually deflect their taunts with submissive charm. It was the anti-climax after the funeral. The knowledge that he would never see his mother again. Nor, so he believed, his father.
Afi had kept his anger under control during the reception after the funeral at the farmhouse, but once everyone had left, he yelled at Ăli and MagnĂșs, ordering them to ignore their father if he ever made an attempt to contact them. Ăli had quickly agreed, but MagnĂșs had said nothing and received a couple of hard clips around the ear as a result.
That night, in their bedroom, MagnĂșs and Ăli had talked. Since the dreadful time when they had been moved up to Bjarnarhöfn from their little white house with its blue roof in ReykjavĂk, MagnĂșs had been firm in his belief that their father would come and rescue them eventually. Ăli had believed him for a year, and then another year, but then he gave up. MagnĂșs was an optimist; Ăli was a realist. You couldnât fight Afi and the life they were now living at the farm; you just had to learn to live it as painlessly as possible.
Their mother had been an intermittent visitor over those four years. They had been told that she couldnât look after them because she was ill. After a year or so, MagnĂșs had figured out it was because she was drunk. Then, that summer, she had finally moved up to Bjarnarhöfn to join them. The boys had been overjoyed, and for moments they did seem to have their mother back. But only moments. When their grandfather had told them, with tears in his eyes, that she had had a terrib...