The Unexpected Journey of Caring

The Transformation from Loved One to Caregiver

Donna Thomson, Zachary White

• Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
• Year: 2019
• Edition: 1
• eBook ISBN:
  9798765183335
• Topic: Social Sciences
• Index: Social Sciences

With a foreword by Judy Woodruff, The Unexpected Journey of Caring is a practical guide to finding personal meaning in the 21st century care experience.



Personal transformation is usually an experience we actively seek out—not one that hunts us down. Becoming a caregiver is one transformation that comes at us, requiring us to rethink everything we once knew. Everything changes—responsibilities, beliefs, hopes, expectations, and relationships. Caregiving is not just a role reserved for "saints"—eventually, everyone is drafted into the caregiver role. It's not a role people medically train for; it's a new type of relationship initiated by a loved one's need for care. And it's a role that cannot be quarantined to home because it infuses all aspects of our lives.



Caregivers today find themselves in need of a crash course in new and unfamiliar skills. They must not only care for a loved one, but also access hidden community resources, collaborate with medical professionals, craft new narratives consistent with the changing nature of their care role, coordinate care with family, seek information and peer support using a variety of digital platforms, and negotiate social support—all while attempting to manage conflicts between work, life, and relationship roles. The moments that mark us in the transition from loved one to caregiver matter because if we don't make sense of how we are being transformed, we risk undervaluing our care experiences, denying our evolving beliefs, becoming trapped by other's misunderstandings, and feeling underappreciated, burned out, and overwhelmed.

Informed by original caregiver research and proven advocacy strategies, this book speaks to caregiving as it unfolds, in all of its confusion, chaos, and messiness. Readers won't find well-intentioned clichés or care stereotypes in this book. There are no promises to help caregivers return to a life they knew before caregiving. No, this book greets caregivers where they are in their journey—new or chronic—not where others expect (or want) them to be.

Table of contents

• CONTENTS
• FOREWORD BY JUDY WOODRUFF
• INTRODUCTION
• 1: I’M (NOT) A CAREGIVER
• PREFACE TO CHAPTERS 2–6: Disorientation: From Loved One to Caregiver
• 2: LIVING IN BETWEEN SCRIPTS
• 3: A HYPER-INTOLERANCE OF OTHERS
• 4: AUDIENCE BETRAYAL
• 5: WHO AM I BECOMING AND WHY AM I SO HARD ON MYSELF?
• 6: WHEN “GETTING THROUGH” ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH
• PREFACE TO CHAPTERS 7–14: Reorientation and Advocacy
• 7: MAKING MEANING THAT MATTERS NOW
• 8: BEGIN WITH THE BASICS: WHAT IS MY ROLE AT HOME, WHAT DO I WANT IT TO BE?
• 9: IT TAKES A VILLAGE: REVEALING HIDDEN ASSETS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD
• 10: NAVIGATING THE ROUGH WATERS OF TRANSITION
• 11: NOT A SOCIAL NETWORK, BUT A CARE NETWORK
• 12: HOW TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT AND GET WHAT YOU NEED
• 13: POWER AND LOVE = EMPOWERMENT
• 14: CULTIVATING CONNECTION
• CONCLUSION: A New Way of Seeing and Being
• NOTES
• BIBLIOGRAPHY
• INDEX