The New York Times bestselling, groundbreaking manifesto on child development during the critical school years when parents must learn to allow their children to experience the disappointment and frustration that occur from life’s inevitable problems so that they can grow up to be successful, resilient, and self-reliant adults
Modern parenting is defined by an unprecedented level of overprotectiveness: parents who rush to school at the whim of a phone call to deliver forgotten assignments, who challenge teachers on report card disappointments, mastermind children’s friendships, and interfere on the playing field. As teacher and writer Jessica Lahey explains, even though these parents see themselves as being highly responsive to their children’s well being, they aren’t giving them the chance to experience failure—or the opportunity to learn to solve their own problems and develop a growth mindset.
Overparenting has the potential to ruin a child’s confidence and undermine their education, Lahey reminds us. Teachers don’t just teach reading, writing, and arithmetic. They teach responsibility, organization, manners, restraint, and foresight—important life skills children carry with them long after they leave the classroom.
Providing a path toward solutions, Lahey lays out a blueprint with targeted parenting advice for handling homework, report cards, social dynamics, and sports. Most importantly, she sets forth a plan to help parents learn to step back and embrace their children’s failures. Hard-hitting yet warm and wise, The Gift of Failure is one of the most essential parenting books for parents, educators, and psychologists nationwide who want to help children succeed.
How do parents step back and embrace failure as a gift? Lahey lays out a research-backed blueprint to help you trade short-term anxiety for your child's long-term competence:
- The Overparenting Trap: Learn why rushing to school with a forgotten assignment or challenging a teacher over a bad grade can undermine your child's education and confidence.
- Building True Resilience: Discover how letting children experience disappointment and frustration is the real path to developing the grit and problem-solving skills they need to succeed.
- Fostering Self-Reliant Children: Find targeted advice for stepping back and allowing your kids to take ownership of their homework, friendships, and choices on the playing field.
- A New Parent-Teacher Partnership: Reset the conversation with educators to focus on fostering responsibility, organization, and other critical life skills, not just grades.