Itâs as if youâve been invited to the White House and you know you are going to smile so you want your teeth to be bright and you brush and brush but because you have a partial plate you are mostly brushing your gums and quite naturally since you want to look fabulous and make the first lady green with envy because you have on your only designer suit and a blouse that if you were honest you actually canât afford but the girl in Saks was so nice and the girl who approved the charge heard the panic in your voice and she, after all, had never been invited to the White House and whatâs more probably never would be so she said: âWhy, yesâ I will approve this charge but do you think you might want to pay us something this month and you said: âAbsolutelyâ because you do want to pay something itâs just that Saks runs up against Nordstromâs and Neiman Marcus not to mention food and shelter so yes absolutely you want to but maybe you will and maybe you canât and thatâs whatâs so hard for people to understandâŚthat distance between want and able, you know? and thatâs what we need to talk about
So, of course, I remember Lena Horne singing âPolka Dots and Moon-beamsâ and my grandmother being totally delighted with the RCA Victor TV and her saying to Grandpapa: âWe better get Nikki up because Lena Horne is on TVâ and me not quite knowing who Lena Horne was at that point though now recognizing that she is a great lady who has fought long and hard for Civil Rights who is also a lady of Delta Sigma Theta and who looks so fabulous in Gap jeans that all the world now wants to be eighty years old and look that good so The Gap was very smart to ask to photograph Lena in those jeans and who was very kind to me when I began my career and who has remained very kind but that is not the point of her being on TV when very few Black people were on television whether or not they were very talented and havenât we come a long way though quite naturally we have a bit of a way to go but my grandmother, you see, always said: If you earn a dollar save a dime and itâs not that my grandfather in any way disagreed but he was more casual about needing and having so Iâm sure it was Grandmother who saved for the RCA Victor TV and even at that I have to acknowledge that she was so intrigued with Nipper that even if it had done nothing more than show the dog responding to âHis Masterâs Voiceâ Grandmother would have thought she had made a good purchase though the TV also brought us Lena Horne so Grandmother was a believer and so am I and that too is a bit off the point only because it was Billie Holiday who sang the definitive âI Wished on the Moon (for something I never knew)â and to hear her sing like even though because of dumb restrictive drug rules that punished some people for some drugs though not others for others she would never be on television which was a total loss to those of us who wished on the moon while observing strange fruits that travel light and we knew hearing that Holiday moan that the moon granted wishes so I started singing thinking if I could throw a note high enough and strong enough there would be the possibility that it would be heard somewhere in space and that is what I want to talk about here
Science teaches us that there is no sound in space and I think thatâs hogwash because if there is no sound in space how will all those wishes get up to the moon and anyone with an ounce of sense knows science fiction is much better than science fact because science fact tries to prove things like Thomas Jefferson wasnât diddling Sally Hemmings and everybody knows people diddle people all the time especially when they canât say no so yes there is sound in space and a large part of it says: I love you in a lot of different ways and when the language is unknown to the hearer other people say things like that is gibberish but love can never be gibberishâŚfoolish for sureâŚsilly you bet but the basis of all relationships is love which is then followed by trust and not the other way around because if trust was the basis there would be world peace and safe international travel but what I want to point out since it is always so important to do something useful is that you should, quite naturally, floss and nickels and dimes have a relationship with dollars and sense but not halves and quarters and machines that tell you deposit more money and Good Luck when it isnât luck that you need but better science which can explain how and why when all is said and done we are left with this density that forces us to recognize the Eagle Nebula is falling into itself and will one day be a planet though mostly we will not be around to see it and then there are those troublesome Black holes which are so totally fascinating though no one can exactly put their finger on what makes them so important and I am here to tell you I know: the density of a Black hole does not prevent light from escaping but rather that once light encounters the Black whole it finds such beauty and peace and comfort it no longer needs to search which is another word for loveâŚand I do
Nothing is justâŚa movieâŚa bookâŚa songâŚ
a piece of cakeâŚa carâŚa close encounter with a construction workerâŚ
a misunderstanding on a dateâŚ
Nothing is onlyâŚjust out in a tennis matchâŚjust burned on the grillâŚ
just in the mailâŚjust to the bank too quicklyâŚjust a little too close to
the foul line to be a home runâŚ
Nothing is simplyâŚcorrectableâŚclearly an accidentâŚhuman errorâŚ
worthy of an apologyâŚever your fault
Itâs like your car wonât start on the only day of the week you have to be on time and youâre worried as always about your blood pressure and your glaucoma which is pressure building up in your eyes until your optic nerve canât take it anymore and you are blind or on the matter of your blood pressure your brain or your vein or your heart canât handle the flow and you stroke out only youâŚof courseâŚdonât dieâŚnot only because you would rather be dead you think but because of course you would not but because you know itâs some sort of a test that you will now be crippled in your speech and most likely the way you walk and how you hold things and well geezolpete things have changed and you liked things the way they were when your car started and you got where you were going on time
But then when things go well you never really have a way of being happy let alone thankful so when your dog comes when you call her and your hot water is on after three people have showered and the oven didnât have a hot spot so the cake didnât overcook and the grill which isnât a smoker nonetheless smoked the steaks and eggplant which made you very happy because it is seldom enough that things do what you want them to do when they are designed to do them let alone when things do something that they arenât designed to do if you know what I mean that you actually contemplate how things would be if they didnât do what they were supposed to do let alone that little extra that makes you so thankful that you are alive and well on a day when things are going well that you wellâŚactually take it for granted that things work when everything your whole life should have told you Always Check the Sale Date on Milk and always always always open the egg carton and even check the eggs themselves because the one day you donât you will get broken eggs or out-of-date milk and then itâs like your car wonât start or your dog wonât come when you call and you are not at all expecting this and it runs your pressures up
Because it is always a pleasure to get into your car which is eleven years old but only seventy-eight thousand miles and you havenât had a car payment for over eight years and you even decided to make a huge commitment to that particular car by purchasing a CD multi-player for it though quite prudently you did not change the speakers and you are always happy to get in and scoot around on the really wonderful black leather pillow your mother gave you for Christmas and look at the beautiful black leather ashtray Ginney gave you for your birthday and smile at the silly American flag that rides in the ashtray because Gary had the Fourth of July at her home and that was part of the decoration and punch up the Charlie Mingus you have all but worn thin because you really love âGood-bye Pork Pie Hatâ and anytime you can hear good jazz and drive a smooth two-seater things should be all right but
Today the car wonât start though the horn will blow and the lights turn on and if you were in a more cavalier mood you would turn on the CD and listen to Mingus followed by Johnny Hartman saying he Just Stopped By to Say Hello but it is against the rules to just sit in your car crying not because you are late since you have practically made a career of being late but because you are late on the one day of the week that you wanted to be on time and that is just a real pisser though I really love this car
I really missed the second part of the revolution. From what I could read and what I could see, not to mention common sense, it seemed to me that the revolutionaries would eat with the people, dress as the people dressed, stay where the people stayed so I missed all of the image thing that fired so many imaginations. And I certainly missed the picky food thing people got into.
I understand and respect the Muslims. They have a religion that proscribes certain things. They not only donât eat pork and pork products they also pray several times a day, they produce and sell a newspaper, and in my time of knowing about The Nation of Islam, they ran fine restaurants and were in the process of building great temples. No. I didnât have a problem with Muslims because I am not Jewish either though kosher chicken and kosher hot dogs are one of humankindâs great taste treats surely not to mention matzo ball soup,...
