The Main Event in Life
(1919)
HU SHI
TRANSLATED BY EDWARD M. GUNN
CHARACTERS
MRS. TIAN ç°ć€Șć€Ș
FORTUNE-TELLER çźćœć
ç
LI MA æćŠ
MISS TIAN YAMEI ç°äșæą
MR. TIAN ç°ć
ç
SETTING
(The parlor of the Tian home. There is a door on the left leading to the front door, and a door on the right leading to the dining room. Upstage is a sofa, flanked by two armchairs. At center stage there is a small round table with a flower vase on it, flanked by two chairs. There is a small writing desk against the left wall.
The walls are hung with scrolls of Chinese paintings and calligraphy, along with two Dutch-style landscape paintings. This East-meets-West arrangement on the walls strongly indicates an atmosphere of a family in transition from tradition to the modern age. It is 1919.
The curtain rises slowly so that the audience can hear from onstage the final notes played by the FORTUNE-TELLER on his stringed instrument. MRS. TIAN is seated in one of the armchairs, while the FORTUNE-TELLER, who is blind, sits on a chair next to the table.)
MRS. TIAN: I donât understand very well what it is youâre saying. Donât you think this match will work out?
FORTUNE-TELLER: Mrs. Tian, I tell it exactly according to the book of horoscopes. All of us fortune-tellers tell it exactly according to the book of horoscopes. You understand thatâ
MRS. TIAN: And according to the book how is it going to be?
FORTUNE-TELLER: This match canât work. If the young lady in your family marries this man, then no good will come of it in the future, that is certain.
MRS. TIAN: Why?
FORTUNE-TELLER: You understand, Iâm merely telling it just as it is. Now the calculations for the year and day of the manâs birth and the year and hour of the young ladyâs birth work out to coincide exactly with the entry in the book that reads:
If snake and tiger marry and mate,
The male will the female then dominate.
If pig and monkey you try to blend,
Thereâs certain to be an untimely end.
These are birth calculations which constitute the strongest taboo against marriage. The signs of snake and tiger by themselves spell mutual destructionâand when you add the day and hour signs on top of that, with the pig and the monkey jinxing each other, then these are two most unpleasant fortunes. If these two people become man and wife, they are certain not to survive together into old age. To be specific, the man will emerge as the stronger, the fate of the husband overtaking that of his wife. Probably the woman will die an early death. Mrs. Tian, you mustnât be offended. Iâm telling the fortune just as it is.
MRS. TIAN: Iâm not offended, not at all. I like it when people are straightforward. And what you said is definitely correct. Itâs what the goddess Guanyin said yesterday, too.
FORTUNE-TELLER: Oh! The bodhisattva Guanyin also said so?
MRS. TIAN: Yes. Over at the temple I got a slip of paper from her with a verse that readâoh, let me get it out and read it to you. (She walks to the writing desk, opens a drawer, takes out a slip of paper, and reads) This is fortune tally number seventy-eight. Most inauspicious.
Spouses are chosen before we are born.
The course that this takes we must not seek to bend.
Those who scorn heaven will find life most forlorn.
Their marriage will suffer an untimely end.
FORTUNE-TELLER: âTheir marriage will suffer an untimely end.â Why, thatâs exactly what I just said.
MRS. TIAN: Of course, what the goddess Guanyin says canât be wrong, but this is the greatest event in our daughterâs life, and itâs up to us as her parents to take the utmost care in our arrangements. So yesterday when I drew this fortune tally I was a little bit uneasy about it, and so I invited you over today to see if there was anything in their birth date calculations that indicated a match.
FORTUNE-TELLER: No, nothing at all.
MRS. TIAN: Since there are only a few phrases on the goddessâs fortune tally itâs not easy to interpret the message. Now that your calculations today coincide with the verse on the tally, then of course that settles it. (Producing money to pay the FORTUNE-TELLER) Iâm much obliged to you, and here is your payment for calculating their birth dates.
FORTUNE-TELLER (taking the money): Thatâs not at all necessary, not at all. Thank you. Thank you so much. I never imagined that what I said would match the verse on the tally!
(He rises.)
MRS. TIAN (calling out): Li Ma!
(LI MA enters from the door to the left.)
Show him out.
(LI MA exits, leading the FORTUNE-TELLER off through the door to the right.)
(MRS. TIAN gathers up the slips of red paper with the birth dates of her daughter and the young man on them, folds them, and puts them in a drawer of the writing desk. She then puts the yellow tally with the verse on it in with them.)
(Speaking to herself) What a shame! Such a shame that these two canât be married!
(MISS TIAN YAMEI enters from the outside through the door to the right. She is twenty-three or twenty-four, dressed for outdoors in an overcoat. Her face has the look of a woman with something on her mind. Upon entering, she takes off her coat as she speaks.)
TIAN YAMEI: Mother, whatâs got you telling fortunes again? I bumped into one of those fortune-tellers at the door as he was going out. Have you forgotten that Father doesnât allow them in the house?
MRS. TIAN: Just this once, my child. I wonât do it again.
TIAN YAMEI: But you promised Father you wouldnât have anything to do with fortune-telling.
MRS. TIAN: I know, I know, but this time I had to ask a fortune-teller. I had him come over to check horoscopes for you and Mr. Chen.
TIAN YAMEI: Oh! oh!
MRS. TIAN: You must understand: this is the biggest event in your life. And you are my only child. I canât just blindly let you marry a man with whom youâre not compatible.
TIAN YAMEI: Who says weâre not compatible? Weâve been friends for years. We certainly are compatible.
MRS. TIAN: You certainly are not. The fortune-teller said youâre not.
TIAN YAMEI: What does he know?
MRS. TIAN: Itâs not just the fortune-teller who says so. The goddess Guanyin too.
TIAN YAMEI: What? You went to ask Guanyin? Fatherâs really going to have something to say about that.
MRS. TIAN: I know your father opposes me in this, just as he opposes me no matter what I do. But think of how we older people presume to decide upon your marriage. No matter how careful we are we canât insure against error. But the bodhisattva Guanyin never deceives people. And then, too, when it gets to the point that both Guanyin and the fortune-teller are saying the same thing, thatâs even more reason to believe it. (She stands and walks to the desk, opening a drawer) Read the verse from Guanyin for yourself.
TIAN YAMEI: I donât want to.
MRS. TIAN (left with no choice but to close the drawer): Donât be so obstinate, child. I like that Mr. Chen very much. He looks to me like a very dependable person. Youâve known him all these years since you met in Japan, and you say you know very well what kind of man he is. Still, youâre young and inexperienced yet, and your judgment could very well be mistaken. Even those of us who are in their fifties and sixties donât presume to put complete faith in their own judgment. It was because I didnât dare put such faith in myself that I went t...