Psychology of Hope

You Can Get Here from There

C.R. Snyder

• Publisher: Free Press
• Year: 2010
• Print ISBN: 9780743254441
• eBook ISBN: 9781439118771
• Topic: Psychology
• Subtopic: Abnormal Psychology
• Index: Psychology

Why do some people lead positive, hope-filled lives, while others wallow in pessimism? In The Psychology of Hope, a professor of psychology reveals the specific character traits that produce highly hopeful individuals. He offers a test to measure one's level of optimism and gives specific advice on how to become a more hopeful person.

CHAPTER ONE
Discovering Hope

I learned this at least by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live that life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours. If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.

—Henry Thoreau, Walden

THROUGH A LOOKING GLASS

Whenever I go to a hospital, I try to find the window where you can see the babies who have just been born. I don’t know which I enjoy more, looking at the newborns or soaking up the joy of the relatives viewing their offspring. This day was different, however. I walked quickly past the baby-viewing window of the Kansas City hospital and headed to my daughter’s room. There I met my granddaughter for the first time. As I held her, I wanted to give her a gift. Surely I could come up with something very special for my first grandchild. Not the usual stuffed animals and outfits, but something she could use for the rest of her life. She should get a lasting gift from her grandfather. It came to me that I’d like to give her hope. When the other gifts have long since worn out and lost their usefulness, she still would have hope. Of course, I cannot hand over a neatly wrapped package of hope to my granddaughter or to all of the other newborns behind the viewing mirror. But, I can try. This book is a start. The following pages tell the unfolding scientific story about this empowering way of thinking. I share the strides made in understanding hope, and how it can be measured and nurtured in children and adults alike. But already I am getting ahead of my story.

FOCUSING HOPE

Let’s start with the most famous tale of hope. According to Greek mythology, Zeus became furious at the mortal Promethius for stealing fire from the gods. Seeking revenge, the gods created the astoundingly beautiful Pandora, who was sent earthward to entice Promethius’ brother. She carried a dowry chest that the gods warned her never to open. Zeus, evidently practicing an early form of reverse psychology, knew Pandora could not resist the temptation to peek into the treasured box. Indeed, off came the lid at Pandora’s hand, and a swarm of plagues spewed out to torment people forever. There was colic, gout, and rheumatism for the body, as well as spite, envy, and revenge for the mind. Hurrying to return the lid to the chest, Pandora found the only thing remaining inside was hope.¹ Did she really get the lid back on the box in time to contain hope? I think not. Why else would we be giving so much attention to hope if it hadn’t been unleashed on the world?

Where does this story leave us? Aside from providing a clue about why a bride’s dowry is called a hope chest, it is a puzzling tale.² Was hope to be something that prolonged the suffering generated by the ills loosed on the world, or was it to be the antidote?

The verdict on hope appears to turn on whether it is perceived as being realistic.³ Questioning whether hope is built on anything substantial, many have viewed it as a curse. That is to say, hope is portrayed as an illusion, totally lacking a basis in reality. For these writers, hope is a structure whose foundation is unsound at best and nonexistent at worst. Consider the following quotes:

Vain hopes are often like the dreams of those who wake.

—Marcus Fabius Quintilianus, De Institutione Oratoria

When I consider life, ‘tis all a cheat; Yet fool’d with hope, men favor deceit.

—John Dryden, Aureng-Zebe

It is natural for men to indulge in the illusion of hope.

—Patrick Henry, Speech in Virginia Convention

He that lives upon hope will die fasting.

—Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard’s Almanac

Hope is a good breakfast, but a bad supper.

—Francis Bacon, Apothegums

Hope lies to mortals, and most believe her.

—Edgar Watson Howe, Country Town Sayings

As you can see by these quotes, this type of hope can be particularly dangerous; it has enormous power to seduce us—but it is a harmful illusion. It supposedly captivates our thoughts, but doesn’t deliver as promised. William Shakespeare evidently agreed, when he wrote in The Rape of Lucrece, “And so by hoping more they have but lesse.”⁴

Historically speaking, hope is rather hopeless for those who assume it totally lacks a realistic basis. But suppose hope is tied to something realistic. As Samuel Coleridge, in his Work Without Hope, put it, “Hope without an object cannot live.”⁵ This simple idea—anchoring hope to a concrete goal—provided a starting point in my model of hope.⁶ In this venture, I join recent social scientists who suggest that hope involves the perception that one’s goals can be met.⁷ It is how we think about reaching those goals that provides the key to understanding hope. My conclusion is that we have been bestowed a very favorable gift, as long as it is goal-directed hope that escaped from Pandora’s box.⁸

The Inevitable Goal

If you watch people, almost invariably you notice they are not wandering about aimlessly. We say they are trying to get somewhere, that they have some goal in mind.⁹ Now, as you are reading this, close your eyes and think of the future. What is the first image or thought that comes to your mind, and how long did it take you to see that something?10 If you are like others I have engaged in this quick-trip exercise, it took only a few seconds to imagine something you want to happen. You may have big or small goals; your goals may be for the short run or the long haul. Although some goals may have a reality that we can touch (e.g., I really want a pizza), our minds must represent these physical realities before we can do anything to reach them. Advertisers know this exceedingly well. They sell us the images of commodities (products, experiences, political candidates, etc.). The real marketplaces for these imagined goals are not in shopping centers throughout our land; rather, they are in our minds.

We are inherently goal-oriented as we think about our futures.¹¹ In the words of the noted psychotherapist Alfred Adler, “We cannot think, feel, will, or act without the perception of a goal.”¹² Indeed, goals capture our attention from the time we awaken in the morning until the time we go to sleep (where, should we dream, goals still appear in the theater of our minds). This conclusion holds whether you live in a Western or an Eastern culture, or any other for that matter. It is simply unthinkable not to think about goals.¹³ Can you do it right now? Careful, because if you try not to entertain a goal, you have one.

Getting from Point A to Point B

At some point in our evolution we humans were able to generate mental representations of ourselves and the world around us. We also developed a linear sense of time in which, roughly speaking, there was a past, a present, and a future. We came to think of ourselves as travelers moving through time, going somewhere.¹⁴

We were not just going anywhere, however. We gave careful thought to where we wanted to go. These thoughts, of course, were about goals. Humanity’s earliest goals were basic and centered, perhaps, on shelter or food. Whatever the goal, we began to think of ourselves as moving toward the achievement of those goals, and our species succeeded in the grand survival game.

Just as our ancestors did, today we think about getting from where we are now, let’s call it Point A, to where we want to go, say Point B. In this context, Point B stands for any of the many goals we may envision ourselves wanting to pursue. In aiming at goals, we are constantly engaging in mental target practice. At the risk of appearing overly simplistic, I believe that life is made up of thousands and thousands of instances in which we think about and navigate from Point A to Point B.¹⁵ This is the basic premise on which my model of hope is built. Indeed, it is the reason this book is subtitled You Can Get There from Here.

NEW HOPE: WHAT IS IT?

Hope is the sum of the mental willpower and waypower that you have for your goals.¹⁶ To understand this definition, I break it down into three basic mental components—goals, willpower, and waypower—and give details for each.

Goals

Goals are any objects, experiences, or outcomes that we imagine and desire in our minds. Thus, a goal is something we want to obtain (such as an object) or attain (like an accomplishment). Earlier, I described these as the Point B’s appearing as mental targets for our thoughts. They may vary from the exceedingly concrete, such as the desire for a new coat, to the truly vague, such as the search for happiness or meaning in life. We may set goals expecting to reach them fairly quickly, such as today I want to get that paper done; or, we may have goals taking a long time to reach, such as I’m going to lose weight.

We need only concern ourselves with goals of some magnitude or importance when it comes to hope.¹⁷ It seems foolish, for example, to assert “I hope to put on my shoes.”¹⁸ Likewise, we do some things so automatically that we should not associate hope with them. Having said this, however, I hasten to note that seemingly small goals can be subgoals for the larger, more important goals that do befit hope.

Neither a goal you have no chance of obtaining nor one you are absolutely certain of meeting is part of hope as I am defining it. Why? If the probabilities of getting your desired goal are truly 0 percent or 100 percent, the outcomes are so overdetermined that hopeful thoughts are irrelevant. My conclusion, therefore, is that the goals involving hope fall somewhere between an impossibility and a sure thing.¹⁹ Of course, there are a lot of goals in this range.

Before leaving these qualifying points, I remind you of a sign that, according to Dante, hangs over the entrance of hell. It reads “Leave every hope you who enter.”²⁰ This advice seems appropriate. After all, we might as well jettison our hope if Dante’s hell is truly a place where we have a 0 percent chance of achieving any of our goals.²¹ If what I have suggested in the previous paragraph is true, however, shouldn’t a sign with the same message hang outside the gates of heaven? Heaven, being the place where all of our goals have a 100 percent chance of being fulfilled, should leave no need for hope. Hope should be left behind for us mortals whose probabilities of goal attainment are in the vast middle.

Willpower

Willpower is the driving force in hopeful thinking. As shown in Figure 1.1, it is the sense of mental energy (as shown by the arrow) that over time helps to propel the person (at Point A) toward the goal (Point B).

Figure 1.1

Willpower, as I use this term, is a reservoir of determination and commitment that we can call on to help move us in the direction of the goal to which we are attending at any given moment. It is made up of thoughts such as I can, I’ll try, I’m ready to do this, and I’ve got what it takes.²² As such, willpower taps our perception that we can initiate and sustain actions directed at a desired goal. There is a vibrancy and strength in willful thinking. Consider, for example, the sign that dentist Ed Delavega painted on the outside of his burned-out office after the 1991 riots in Los Angeles: “YOU BURNED MY PLACE, BUT NOT MY SPIRITS.”²³

Although we can apply our determination to a wide range of goals, generally it is easier to activate willful thinking when we imagine important goals. People talk about getting psyched up for major goals such as hunting for a job, finding a mate, having children, or dealing with an illness. Indeed, it is advantageous to each of us individually, as well as to our species more generally, to become primed mentally to meet the big goals in life.

Willpower also should be ignited more easily when we can clearly understand and represent a goal in our minds. Vague goals, therefore, do not provide the mental spark to get us moving. In doing psychotherapy, for example, I sometimes encounter lethargic clients who cannot focus on what they want. Such people have never learned how to pinpoint their goals. (I discuss how to improve this skill for children in chapter 5 and for adults in chapter 6). Once people clarify their goals, they often are filled with active and empowering thoughts.

Willpower taps the sense of potential for action that we bring to situations in general and to given situations in particular. It reflects our thoughts about initiating and sustaining movement toward desired goals. Our ability to produce this mental willfulness is based, in part, on a previous history of successfully activating our mind and body in the pursuit of goals. It is important to highlight, however, that willpower is not acquired through a life of ease in which goal pursuits occur without any hindrances. On the contrary, it is based on our tacit knowledge that, even during stressful times when we run into blockages on the way to our goals, we have been able to generate the mental efforts required to overcome them. Indeed, the most willful people are the ones who have overcome previous difficulties.²⁴

Consider the example of Tom, a thirty-eight-year-old participant in a graduate student support group I was running. Having worked in many jobs, including a ten-year stint in the army, Tom completed his undergraduate diploma. Now working on his Ph.D. in sociology, Tom was fervent in his desire to get this degree. In fact, he became the pep leader of the group. His enthusiasm and support for other group members in their pursuit of graduate degrees were remarkable. At one point in the group, he had the sophisticated and sedate graduate students chanting, “We can do it! We can do it!” This enlivening chant was followed with a good laugh by all. When group members were feeling particularly low, they would call on Tom for one of his pump-up cheers. In Tom, therefore, we see the prototype of willful thinking. In my experience, his level of high determination was unmatched.

Waypower

Waypower reflects the mental plans or road maps that guide hopeful thought.²⁵ As shown in Figure 1.2, it shows the route (the arrow) through which the person (at Point A) must travel over time toward the goal (Point B).

Figure 1.2

Waypower is a mental capacity we can call on to find one or more effective ways to reach our goals. That is to say, the perception that one can engage in planful thought is essential for waypower thinking.

The factors influencing our mental waypower are similar to those described previously for willpower. In particular, our waypower (planning) capabilities can be applied to many different goals; generally, it is easier to plan effectively when our goals are well defined. For example, it may be difficult to plan to become a better parent, but it is considerably easier to resolve to spend more time with one’s children in the evenings.

It also is more likely that waypower thinking should occur for more as compared to less important goals. Important goals not only beckon our mental willpower, therefore, but these goals also elicit enhanced planfulness. This is true because in growing up we spend a good deal of time thinking about how to achieve our important goals. Indeed, we should have considerable practice planning for the recurring important goals in our lives.

Waypower capabilities are based, in part, on a previous history of successfully finding one or more avenues to one’s goals. Relevant research suggests that our memory, in fact, is organized in goals and plans.²⁶ In other words, we mentally file information according to our goals and the associated pathways. Furthermore, our sense of being able to generate ways to our goals probably is enhanced by previous successes at coming up with new routes to goals when our original passageways have been blocked. As we know, life places barriers in our paths.²⁷ In such instances, waypower ...

Table of contents

• Cover Page
• Title Page
• CREDITS
• CONTENTS
• PREFACE
• CHAPTER ONE Discovering Hope
• CHAPTER TWO Measuring Hope
• CHAPTER THREE The Development of Hope
• CHAPTER FOUR The Death of Hope
• CHAPTER FIVE Nurturing Hope in Children
• CHAPTER SIX Kindling Hope in Adults
• CHAPTER SEVEN Hope for Relationships and Vice Versa
• Books to Help Children with Scholastic, Athletic, and Social Skills
• Books on Children’s Hope-Related Issues
• NOTES
• REFERENCES
• INDEX