Storyshowing

How to Stand Out from the Storytellers

Sam Cawthorn

• Publisher: Wiley
• Year: 2017
• Print ISBN: 9780730345886
• eBook ISBN: 9780730345909
• Edition: 1
• Topic: Business
• Subtopic: Business General
• Index: Business

Take your audience on a journey to leave a more lasting impact

Storyshowing is an instruction manual for making connections. Storytelling has been shown to be one of the most effective methods of persuasion, motivation and inspiration, yet the disconnect remains — you're still only telling. To truly influence people, you need to go deeper than that — you need to show them your story. By inviting your audience in, you connect on a much deeper, more emotional level; you bypass the brain and connect at the root of what it means to be human, leaving a profound impact on their entire outlook. This book shows you how to transcend telling and start showing your story, using an easy-to-follow framework you can start applying today. Unearth your own experiences, and bring your vulnerabilities out into the light; share your emotions and forge a path to true communication. Use images, body language and gestures as tools to build that indelible connection; then and only then will people truly engage and transform their thinking.

No matter your message, the impact lies in the delivery. This insightful guide equips you with the tools and skills you need to start communicating like never before.

• Share more powerful stories using a simple 5-step method
• Build confidence, influence others and make a deeper connection
• Be more persuasive in presentations, pitches, calls and talks
• Transform the way people think by inviting them inside your story

The difference between telling and showing is like the difference between a lecture and a play. It's the difference between giving information and taking the audience on a journey. The difference between a brochure and a test drive. Storyshowing helps you level up your communication to leave a lasting, more profound impact.

Chapter 1
So why are stories important?

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Stories unlock the emotion in all communication.

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‘Those who tell the stories rule society.’ That is not a content marketer talking today, but a bold statement from the Greek philosopher Plato, who was born in 428 BC. Stories have been with us forever in the history of the world and throughout our own lives. The Macquarie Dictionary defines story as ‘a narrative, either true or fictitious, in prose or verse, designed to interest, instruct, or amuse the hearer or reader’.

To amuse and instruct our children, we read or make up stories for them. When someone’s life ends, we share stories about them in the eulogy at their funeral and over drinks at their wake.

The most powerful leaders understand how stories disrupt our emotions and convince people to share their views. Mahatma Gandhi inspired the Indian people and changed their country forever, not by starting a war, but by showing them how he lived and by transforming people’s way of thinking through his stories and speeches. Equally, he was always curious and ready to listen to other people’s stories.

Addressing the All India Congress Committee at Bombay on 8 August 1942, Mahatma Gandhi said:

I have no weapon but love to wield my authority over anyone. I do sport a stick which you can break into bits without the slightest exertion.

It is simply my staff with the help of which I walk. Such a cripple is not elated, when he has been called upon to bear the greatest burden. You can share that burden only when I appear before you not as your commander but as a humble servant. And he who serves best is the chief among equals.

Therefore I was bound to share with you, such thoughts as were welling up in my breast and tell you in as summary a manner as I can, what I expect you to do as the first step.

Sharing his thoughts, hardships and emotions in speeches such as this famous example, Gandhi helped bring about India’s independence from Britain. He used his own, personal stories to help transform a nation.

A call to action

The best salespeople in the world create global anticipation for their new products through their stories. In his keynote presentation to launch the iPhone at MacWorld in 2007, Steve Jobs started with the words, ‘This is a day I’ve been looking forward to for two and a half years’, immediately sharing his emotions with his audience. Then, in a few carefully chosen words, he showed the history of Apple from 1984 to that day when he launched what he described as three ‘revolutionary products’. A master at sharing his stories, Jobs used his body language, his choice of strong, emotive words and his distinctive delivery style to show his audience that what was coming next would be so much more than simply a new type of telephone.

Hearing a story makes us look at things in a different way; it’s a call to action for us to buy that product or those services, or engage with someone and their ideas and experiences. It brings us right into the world of the person who is sharing their story. As speakers, as marketers, as businesspeople or as leaders we know that to get our message across and to persuade our clients, customers or students we must use a story. It is integral to any sales strategy now, just as it is an intrinsic part of a keynote talk or a presentation.

Corporate stories are just as important as a company’s name and logo. Likewise, the stories that customers tell about the service, or that employees tell about their work experience, can support or corrupt a company’s branding and reputation. Success stories, campaign stories, life stories, corporate histories, motivational, inspirational or problem-solving stories: there are so many forms of story that businesses and corporations develop and use. Sales staff — or anyone who builds relationships with others — have to create a story that will both motivate and inspire their clients. Stories are about people, about who we are and what we feel; they are about what we have experienced in the highs and lows of our lives. Compelling stories show our emotions, our vulnerability and our authenticity.

The power of emotions

It’s clear that we need stories, so maybe we should consider the question ‘Why are stories important?’ another way. What happens if we don’t share our story with emotion and with our hearts?

Remember the story about my first speaking engagement? I thought I was awesome up there on the stage, fully prepared with statistics and all my other research. I was serious and I was going to impress my audience. Well, that didn’t happen; instead, they were polite and underwhelmed.

I knew that something was wrong with my speech, but I really couldn’t identify what it was. Looking back, I can see that I was trying too hard, and in doing that I was focused too much on the head and not enough on the heart. I was not sharing my vulnerability or my emotions. I didn’t realise that I needed to connect with my audience rather than simply inform them. I was certainly entertaining them, but that was not enough. I couldn’t work out what I should do after that event — all I had was the feedback that I was average and no-one was rushing up to book me again. So I decided I had to polish my message more. Then I thought maybe I just needed to be funnier, so I came up with more jokes. Next, I went out and got training, at home and overseas, on speaking.

That was all useful, but I knew there was still something I just wasn’t getting. The pivotal moment of change — the instant when I realised what I had to do — came when I met a writing coach in New York City named Marilyn Horowitz.

I went to a conference called ‘Author 101’ in Los Angeles, California, and that’s where I heard Professor Marilyn Horowitz give a talk about writing. After the event I went to New York City to speak at an event and I realised that Professor Horowitz was based in New York. Through persistence and grit, I managed to find her and she agreed to meet me. I took her out to lunch and told her about the book I was writing (which eventually became Bounce Forward) and about my car accident and what I had been doing since then. I said I had won Young Australian of the Year, I was a speaker and I’d overcome my accident easily and never looked back!

And then Professor Horowitz asked me how I really got through the accident and the months of rehab.

I said, ‘Well, I just overcame it, it was easy, you know, I just simply got over it.’

She asked me the same question again; she asked how I got through it all, really.

I kept telling her and in a way she didn’t believe me and I didn’t get what she was going on about.

Then Marilyn asked me something that came as a total surprise. She asked me to think about the little boy inside me. She wanted me to consider what that little boy would say about the accident and the year I spent in a wheelchair and the whole recovery process.

I stopped talking and thought. Then I asked, ‘What do you mean?’

Marilyn explained that when I talked about this crisis point in my life I sounded as if I did not have any emotional connection to what I had gone through. It was as if I didn’t care about myself and wasn’t able to acknowledge or talk about all the emotions I had felt as I slowly recovered and picked up my life again. She made me realise that I was saying ‘I got over the accident quickly and continued with my life, and now I’m this happy individual.’ Maybe that’s what I did believe before I talked to her, and I thought it was okay, but that wouldn’t help me to express my real feelings as a writer.

Or as a speaker.

Marilyn Horowitz made me aware of the power of my emotions. She made me think about how and why to bring emotions into my story. She showed me why I should allow myself to be vulnerable and authentic in front of an audience. That’s when I realised that jokes and facts and figures aren’t enough. They are merely entertainment and information. Instead, I had to truly share my story. In a story you take the listener with you, even when your journey is hard, sad or painful. You need to show how you changed during your journey because of the obstacles you encountered.

An Indian storyteller, Jeeva Raghunath, said something that I agree with 100 per cent: ‘Stories are not from head to head, they are from heart to heart. Every story has a soul. It has life.’

Other speakers have had similar experiences to what I went through when I gave my first major talk to that group at the Gold Coast. My colleague Drew Wade is a great speaker, but she only began to connect with her audience when she stopped confusing context for story. She remembers how she felt when she started.

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DREW WADE’S STORY

I’d just become qualified as a dating and relationships coach and this was my first speaking engagement. I felt the information I had could make or break relationships so I was committed to getting it across.

I told the historic context of my story and then went straight into presenting the hard facts. The statistics were overwhelming. I even used different types of chocolate to represent different grades of relationships, because I thought that would be a fun way to demonstrate my points.

My style was warm and engaging, but the audience was looking blank; I could see they weren’t receiving the message. My delivery was not as compelling as it should have been. I was hitting a brick wall and couldn’t understand why. I’d done my research and preparation, I had good intentions and I’d given it my best shot. I had everything I thought I needed. Knowing I’d failed to communicate what I had to say made me want to crawl into the foetal position and hide.

The talk was missing something. It was missing a heartfelt story that had audience relevance. I thought I was doing that. But actually, all I was doing was explaining the context. I was telling them everything I had researched: ‘This principle is that; this is important; these are the facts and data; this is what you’ve got to know.’

Sam coached me and I learned how an audience hears emotions and how to incorporate relevant vulnerability into my personal experience.

Some months later, I spoke on the same topic, but this time I used stories of my own experience, woven with the facts. I shared the sweaty-palmed exuberance of my first kiss, vividly re-creating what I had gone through. This time around, the audience could see and feel what I had felt. It was relatable and they could connect with my message. It took them to a place where they felt nostalgic for their own experiences, and were then able to apply my knowledge to their lives.

Once I realised that I had to present data within an authentic story, and lead people through my own vulnerability, it became simple. I was a classic case of someone who thought that telling the story was more important than taking someone on the emotional journey. Now I know that making that emotional connection is essential.

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Stories disrupt

All stories are disruptive. They disrupt our way of thinking so that by the time we have finished listening to a story about someone or something, we will be looking at them differently.

In 2010, Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, gave a TEDWomen talk titled ‘Why we have too few women leaders’. What’s interesting is what happened backstage before the talk. She was standing next to Pat Mitchell, a former president of CNN Productions and host of the global TEDWomen conference. Just before walking on stage, Sandberg turned to Mitchell and said she’d been having a tough time. The last straw was when her three-year-old daughter clung to her leg, asking her to stay and not wanting to let go as Sheryl was about to board a flight to go and give her TED talk the next day. She told Mitchell this because they were friends, not because she thought the experience had anything to do with the subject she was going to talk about in a few min...

Table of contents

• Cover
• Epigraph
• Title Page
• Copyright
• About the author
• Acknowledgements
• Introduction: I told you so!
• Chapter 1: So why are stories important?
• Chapter 2: Beginning, middle and end
• Chapter 3: Giving structure to your story
• Chapter 4: The toggle
• Chapter 5: Building your content
• Chapter 6: Stand up and show your story
• Chapter 7: From average to outstanding
• Chapter 8: The four disrupters of the speaking industry
• Chapter 9: The future of story
• Chapter 10: Show, don’t tell
• Conclusion: How telling then showing helped me
• References
• Advert
• EULA