PART ONE
Scene One
The inside of a round fortification tower built of granite.
In the background, double doors of glass set in a large gateway, through which can be seen a fortified seashore and the sea.
A window.
A writing table, upon it a telegraph machine.
Two dilapidated armchairs, a chaise longue, a small chair against a wall.
A large portrait of ALICE in stage costume on the wall. Also a large mercury barometer.
ALICE. Shall I keep the door open?
CAPTAIN. Up to you.
ALICE. Open, then. (A pause.) Youâre not smoking.
CAPTAIN. I donât know, lately strong tobaccoâs got to my stomach.
ALICE. Smoke something weaker. You say itâs your only pleasure.
CAPTAIN. âPleasureâ? What does that word mean?
ALICE. Iâve not the faintest idea. (A pause.) Do you want a whisky?
CAPTAIN. Bit early. Whatâs for supper?
ALICE. How do I know? Ask the girl.
CAPTAIN. The mackerel should be in season soon. Itâs autumn, after all. Outside⊠and inside. (A pause.) A mackerel, crusted skin gleaming from the grill, with a slice of lemon and a chilled, white burgundy.
ALICE. Poetic all of a sudden, darling?
CAPTAIN. Is there any burgundy left in the cellar?
ALICE. You drank it.
CAPTAIN. Better stock up then. Celebrate our thirtieth wedding anniversary.
ALICE. Youâre not serious.
CAPTAIN. Naturally.
ALICE. It would be more ânaturalâ to celebrate thirty years of misery.
CAPTAIN. Alice my sweet, yes, itâs been horribly miserable but weâve had good times. Now and then. And we must make use of the time we have left before itâs all over.
ALICE. You and I âoverâ? If only.
CAPTAIN. Donât worry! We are over. Itâs all dead. This marriage is dead⊠manure. Shovel it into a wheelbarrow, spread it on the garden.
ALICE. It would kill off all the plants.
CAPTAIN. Well, there we go.
A pause.
ALICE. Did the post come?
CAPTAIN. Yes.
The CAPTAIN pulls out envelopes.
ALICE. Is the butcherâs bill there?
CAPTAIN. You look.
ALICE. Eyes worse, are they?
CAPTAIN. Nonsense.
ALICE. Slackening of muscles in the eyeballs.
CAPTAIN. Rubbish.
ALICE (looks at the bill). Can you pay this?
CAPTAIN. Of course. Later.
ALICE. How late? In a yearâs time, when youâve got your weeny, weeny little pension? Or later than that, when your illness has come backâŠ
CAPTAIN. What illness, never been ill in my life. A little⊠nausea. Iâve got twenty more years at least.
ALICE. The doctor doesnât think so.
CAPTAIN. DoctorâŠ
A pause.
ALICE. Heâs throwing a party tonight.
CAPTAIN. I know the quackâs throwing a party, donât harp on about it!
ALICE. We werenât invited.
CAPTAIN. We werenât invited because we donât socialise with the quack, and we donât socialise with the quack because we donât want to, because I despise him and I despise his silly, goose-brained, always-with-a-new-hairdo wife. They are rubbish.
ALICE. Everyoneâs rubbish to you.
CAPTAIN. People are rubbish.
ALICE. Well then, another evening in. (A pause.) Do you want to play cards?
CAPTAIN. Fine.
ALICE takes a pack of cards from a drawer in the sewing table and begins to shuffle.
ALICE. Just think, the doctorâs got the Army Band to play at his party.
CAPTAIN. Thatâs because heâs a wheedler, he wheedles his way in with the Colonel in the town. If only I could wheedle.
ALICE. I used to like Gerda. Then she turned vicious.
CAPTAIN. Theyâre all vicious. What are trumps over there?
ALICE. Put your glasses on.
CAPTAIN. Theyâre no use. Well? WhatâŠ
ALICE. Spades are trumps.
CAPTAIN (disgruntled). SpadesâŠ
ALICE leads.
ALICE. Sheâs turned the wives of the new officers against us, theyâve really got it in for you and me.
CAPTAIN. Donât care, I put up with it. Iâve always been a loner.
ALICE. Well, at least weâre alike in that. But I fear for our daughter, growing up without any society.
CAPTAIN. If she wants âsocietyâ let her get it, in town. I took that! Have you got more trumps there?
ALICE. One! There!
CAPTAIN. Six and eight equals fifteenâŠ
ALICE. Fourteen! Fourteen!
CAPTAIN.âŠsix and eight equals fourteen. Iâve forgotten how to count. And two makes⊠sixteen⊠(Yawns.) You deal.
ALICE. Tired, darling?
CAPTAIN. Not at all.
ALICE listens in the direction of the door.
ALICE. You can hear the music all this way. (A pause.) Do you think they invited Kurt?
CAPTAIN. Well, he got here this morning so heâll have had time to get his fancy dress suit out. Not that heâs had time to call on us.
ALICE. Whatâs all this about him being âMaster of Quarantineâ, are they going to make a quarantine station here?
CAPTAIN. Oh yes.
ALICE. Why donât you tell me these things? God! (A pause.) Well, heâll be important and he is my cousin, we did share the same name onceâŠ
CAPTAIN. A dubious honour.
ALICE. Donât start on my family and I wonât start on yours.
CAPTAIN. No, donât letâs get into all that again.
A pause.
ALICE. Doesnât the Master of Quarantine have to be a doctor?
CAPTAIN. Not at all, heâs just a jumped-up civil servant, a bookkeeper with a flashy title. The perfect rubbish post for Kurt.
God knows what heâs been up to in America. Well, I havenât missed him.
ALICE. Strange though.
CAPTAIN. What is?
ALICE. That Kurt should come back just in time for our thirtieth.
CAPTAIN. Why is that strange? Oh, I see, you mean because he brought us together.
ALICE. Well, he did.
CAPTAIN. Our matchmaker. Ha! Thought he was saving you, didnât he.
ALICE. Stupid ideaâŠ
CAPTAIN. Well, weâve had to pay for it, not him.
ALICE. Imagine if Iâd stayed in the theatre. All my friends are famous now.
CAPTAIN. Right, a drink.
He walks over to the sideboard and makes himself a drink, ...