The Heart of Leadership

Becoming a Leader People Want to Follow

Mark Miller

• Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers
• Year: 2013
• ISBN:
  9781609949624
• Topic: Business
• Subtopic: Leadership
• Index: Business

Understand what sets great leaders apart by learning the five qualities of leadership character from the international-bestselling coauthor of The Secret. Certainly, leaders need people skills, execution skills, a deep knowledge of industry trends, the ability to articulate a vision, and more—they must be competent—but that's just the tip of the iceberg. What's below the waterline? What's deep inside the best leaders that makes them different? Mark Miller contends it is their leadership character. In his latest enlightening and entertaining business fable, he describes the five unique character traits exhibited by exceptional leaders and how to cultivate them. The Heart of Leadership begins with young and ambitious Blake Brown being passed over for a desperately wanted promotion, despite an outstanding individual performance. Confused and frustrated, he turns to his former mentor, who sends him on a quest to meet with five of his late father's colleagues, each of whom holds a piece of the puzzle he's trying to solve. As Blake puts the pieces together, he discovers that in the final analysis, a lack of skills isn't what holds most leaders back. Without demonstrated leadership character, a skill set will never be enough. Most often, when leaders fail to reach their full potential, it is an issue of the heart. This is Blake's ultimate revelation. This book shows us that leadership needn't be the purview of the few—it is within reach for millions around the world. The Heart of Leadership is a road map for every person who desires to make a difference in the lives of others and become a leader people want to follow.

It’s Not About You

When Blake got to his office, he already had an email from Debbie with the names of the men and women in his father’s former group. Judging from their titles alone, it looked like an eclectic group—a CEO, a judge, the leader of a large nonprofit, a high school football coach, and a school superintendent.

Blake started making calls and scheduling meetings. He was delighted that everyone he called seemed genuinely interested in meeting with him.

His first meeting was in about a week.

• • •

Monday morning at 7:00, Blake found himself standing on the curb in front of an old building in the heart of the city. He was not alone; a couple of dozen other people waited for the doors to open as well. As Blake looked at his watch, he had a sense that no one else in the group was concerned about the time. Although he was attempting not to be judgmental, he assumed, based on their appearance, that his companions on the curb were all homeless. The crowd had gathered at Heaven’s Kitchen, a nonprofit organization started by Chad Culpepper. Chad was the youngest member of his dad’s small group. He had joined right out of college.

At about 7:05, the doors opened. Blake and the others made their way into a large room with long tables. The men and women who’d been waiting formed a line at one end of the room. They seemed to know the routine.

Blake watched as people went through the line, picking up what looked like oatmeal and a piece of toast. At the end—where you would expect a cash register to be—each guest was greeted by a young man. Although Blake couldn’t hear what was being said, he noticed that the conversations were brief; they all seemed to begin with a handshake and end with a hug.

After watching for about five minutes, Blake realized he should probably be looking for Chad. He approached one of the hostesses in the dining room.

“Hi, I’m looking for Chad.” The woman pointed to the man at the end of the line. He was the one everyone talked to before they sat down to eat.

Just then, Chad caught Blake’s eye and motioned him over. Chad was standing there with a man who appeared to be about 80 years old. Blake knew it was probably just life on the street that had aged his appearance.

Chad spoke first as Blake approached, “You must be Blake. Thanks for coming by. I want you to meet someone. This is Larry. Larry, this is Blake. Blake is Jeff Brown’s son.”

“Jeff Brown was the finest man I ever knew,” Larry said.

Blake was flabbergasted. “You knew my dad?”

“Knew him? He was my hero. He used to stand right here where Chad is standing today. He established the handshake and the hug ritual. He taught us—no, he showed us—that we mattered regardless of our circumstances. He showed us honor, dignity, and respect … and he loved us.”

Blake just stood there, literally speechless.

Chad broke the awkward silence. “Larry’s had some hard times, but he’s making it. He works several days a week now. He’s also been in school recently learning to be a mechanic.”

“One more semester.” Larry smiled.

“We’re here just to help him get by until he can get back on his feet. Thanks for coming in today, Larry.”

“Thank you, Chad.” Larry gave Chad a hug and turned and hugged Blake also.

Blake was still trying to get his bearings. He was feeling overwhelmed. The place, the people, the need, the hugs, the fact Larry knew his dad. It was all a bit too much in the moment.

Chad said, “Let’s have a seat.” He motioned to someone else who took over his spot at the end of the line.

The handshake and hug would continue to be part of every guest’s visit.

“Thanks for coming today, Blake.”

“Larry knew my dad,” Blake said, still trying to process what he’d just learned.

“Yes, many of the men and women in here this morning knew your dad.”

“How did they know him?” Blake asked.

“He used to come here a lot. As Larry said, he stood right there giving out handshakes and hugs.”

“I didn’t know. How could I not know?”

“Your dad didn’t come here for attention; he came here to give it. Maybe that’s why he didn’t tell you.”

“Wow. I knew my dad was a great leader, but this is a side of him I didn’t know about.”

“Maybe you’re getting an insight into why he was a great leader,” Chad added. “Now, why did you want to meet today?”

“Oh, yes, I’m trying to strengthen my leadership character. Debbie Brewster suggested I meet with you.”

“I love these meetings!” Chad’s energy level picked up a level. “Before we proceed, who else have you met with?”

“You’re the first on my list.”

“I love being first.”

“Why?”

“Because I think what I’ve got to say is the most important.”

“Really? Why is what you have to share with me most important?”

“Has someone drawn the iceberg for you?”

“Yes, Debbie did.”

“Great, we’ll skip that. But you remember, leadership is both what’s above the waterline—”

“The skills,” Blake interjected.

“Yes, the skills—but the majority of leadership is what’s below the waterline. That’s what you’re trying to learn about—leadership character. It’s the game changer. Your ultimate success will not be determined by your level of skills. Leaders rarely fail because of lack of skills. They’re too easy to learn. It’s leadership character that trips up a lot of leaders.

“So your challenge and mine is to understand, embrace, and cultivate both the leadership character and the skills needed to lead.”

“That’s sounds like a great summary of what Debbie’s been trying to help me understand.” This conversation was already helping Blake get clarity on the challenge ahead. Now he just needed some of the specifics about this thing called leadership character.

“Okay, so what do you believe is the most important element of leadership character?”

“Think others first,” Chad said.

Blake jotted down Chad’s comment.

“Exactly what does that mean to you?” Blake wanted to be clear on the implications.

“In my opinion, this is what really separates the best leaders from everyone else. If you miss this one, you’ll struggle with all the other things you’re going to learn on your visits about leadership character … and you’ll never be a great servant leader.”

“Now, I did hear my dad talk about servant leadership. To tell you the truth, I don’t think I was listening too well. I was just a kid, and I was not thinking about serving others. I was mostly focused on me and my life.”

“That’s understandable. And I think your choice of words is insightful. Many leaders stumble because they never get past that point.”

“Which point?” Blake asked.

“The point where they are completely focused on their life, their career, their agenda, and their recognition. I’m glad you’re here today. You’re still young. Your greatest leadership impact can still lie in your future.”

“I’m glad to be here, too. Let’s go back to this idea of servant leadership. I have a couple of questions—first, what is it, exactly?”

“Servant leadership is an approach contrary to conventional leadership in which the leader’s focus is on himself and what he can accomplish and achieve. Rather, the focus is on those being served. Servant leaders do many of the same things other leaders do—cast vision, build teams, allocate resources, and so on. The big difference is their orientation and their motivation; these make all the difference in the world. They possess an others-first mindset. The servant leader constantly works to help others win.”

“Can’t you lead without being a servant leader?”

“Sure you can. But in most settings, traditional leadership is outdated. It relies too heavily on the contribution of the leader and undervalues the talent and skills of those being led. The best leaders want to leverage all the capabilities of the people in their organization. I don’t want to get stuck with old, antiquated methods. Servant leadership is a higher form of leadership. Servant leadership is the path to superior, sustained results.”

“Why does servant leadership work so well?”

“Servant leadership works for many reasons: First, it focuses on others—specifically, those you desire to lead. Your ever-present question is not what can you do for yourself; rather, it is how can you serve them? When decisions are made, you consider the organization and your people before you weigh the personal consequences.

“Servant leadership also works because it honors people—being a servant leader acknowledges the different roles, responsibilities, and strengths of people. It is not about who’s in charge. It’s about who is responsible for what, and how can I, as the leader, help people be successful?

“Another reason it works so well is servant leadership builds trust—we trust leaders whose motives are others-centered. Candor, feedback, encouragement, and even directives feel different when trust is present. When our leaders serve, we trust them more. Trust is also a key ingredient in loyalty and retention.

The servant leader constantly
works to help others win.

“Next, it raises engagement—there is clearly an inspirational component at play when we see our leaders serve on our behalf. It energizes us as followers. When you and I believe that our leaders are for us and that they want to serve us, we want to serve them and the organizations they lead.

“And finally, leadership always reveals the heart of the leader—even when what is exposed is not pretty. If it is a heart focused on serving together to accomplish a common goal, it motivates people to do their best work. The sense that we’re doing this together makes servant leadership extremely powerful.”

“Wow! It sounds like you’ve thought about this,” Blake said, as he frantically tried to capture some of what he’d just heard in his notes.

“I have. I did my thesis on servant leadership. Did you know we graduated from the same school?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Yep, I was about five years ahead of you. When I graduated, I needed to decide what to do with my life. That’s when I met Debbie and your dad. They helped me more than I can describe. They taught me that at the end of the day, what matters most is what I’ve done to serve others. That’s how our lives will be evaluated. Not by the things we amassed. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with stuff. But, what we do for others matters most.”

“That’s why you said the most important character trait for a leader is think others first.”

“Yes, that’s why. For me, that means starting this place. For your dad, it meant making a lot of money so he could help even more people than I could ever imagine. The ways we impacted people’s lives were different, but we both had the same motivation—we wanted to serve. We consider serving others a high calling.”

“Okay, I think I understand. What I need to know is how to get off my own agenda. How do I think others first if that’s not my natural bent?”

“First, don’t feel all alone. My experience is that most leaders could ask the same question—I struggle, too.”

“You do? You run a nonprofit to feed homeless people! What could be more others-centered?”

“Let me offer a clarification. To think others first is not primarily about what you do—it is about how you think. Think others first, as with the other facets of leadership character you’re going to discover, is all about what’s in your heart, not what you do with your hands.”

“So how do I do it, think others first?”

“I have a couple of ideas, but no guarantees.”

“I’m not looking for guarantees; I’m looking for ideas that...