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Asking—The Most Important Discipline in Sales
Go for no.
—Andrea Waltz
Richard left 71 voice mail messages asking for an appointment. He sent 18 emails. He stalked me on LinkedIn.
He managed to get me to answer the phone on at least three occasions, but I brushed him off each time. He also called, and wrote, and connected on social media with each of the key stakeholders in my organization.
For five months Richard asked and asked and asked for an opportunity to demonstrate his software solution. And for five months, he got nowhere—until he finally caught me at the right time. It was in May, five months after his first attempt to set an appointment.
When I answered the phone, I recognized his voice. I almost brushed him off again, but since I didn't have anything else scheduled and he'd been so persistent, I felt a subconscious obligation to give him a chance.
Richard wasted no time getting me to agree to a demo. His software as a service (SaaS) solution was impressive, and it did solve one of our training delivery problems. I was transparent about how much I liked what he'd shown me. Less than an hour later, he asked for my commitment to buy.
Without thinking, I threw out an objection:
“Richard, it looks like a great program and I like it. But I'm going to need to discuss it with my team before we commit to anything. I know some of them have advocated for your platform, but my schedule is packed, and getting everyone up to speed and using it is going to be a distraction in the short term. I want to be sure we are all aligned before making this investment, because I don't want to buy yet another software program that everyone is excited about but never uses.”
Richard responded by relating to my situation and clarifying my concern:
“Jeb, it sounds like you've been burned in the past with SaaS subscriptions that go unused. I get it! It feels like you're just pouring money down the drain.
“If I understand you correctly, it seems like your top concerns are: a) it's going to be a distraction training everyone, and b) if we don't get your team up to speed fast, they won't use it and it will be a wasted investment.
“Did I get that right?”
I agreed that those were my biggest concerns. It felt good that he really seemed to understand where I was coming from.
“Other than these two concerns, what else do we need to address?”
I responded that there was nothing else holding me back. Then he minimized my concern:
“The best way for your team to experience the power of our platform is to get their hands on it. What if I take the burden off you and take full responsibility for getting your team trained and making sure they are using it?
“With your blessing, I'll schedule a training call with your trainers and coaches to show them how to use the platform. I'll then monitor their usage and report back to you each week until we've integrated usage into their daily routine. That way it doesn't take any time out of your busy schedule, and you have the peace of mind that your money is well spent.
“Since this isn't a long-term commitment and you can quit anytime, if your team doesn't use the program we can shake hands and part ways. There isn't much to lose here and there's a lot to gain, so why don't we get your account set up, and let me make this easy for you?”
Before I knew it, he had my corporate AMEX card number and Sales Gravy was his newest customer.
The Discipline to Ask
Asking is the most important discipline in sales. You must ask for what you want, directly, assumptively, assertively, and repeatedly. Asking is the key that unlocks:
- Qualifying information
- Appointments
- Demos
- Leveling up to decision makers or down to influencers
- Information and data for building your business case
- Next steps
- Micro-commitments
- Buying commitments
In sales, asking is everything. If you fail to ask, you'll end up carrying a box full of the stuff from your desk to your car on the way to the unemployment line. Your income will suffer. Your career will suffer. Your family will suffer. You will suffer.
When you fail to ask, you fail.
It's the truth and this truth will not change. But as my favorite line from the movie The Big Short goes, “The truth is like poetry. And most people fucking hate poetry.”
You Are Not Getting What You Want Because You Are Not Asking for What You Want
If you are having a hard time getting the next appointment, getting to decision makers, getting information from stakeholders, leveling up higher in the organization, or closing the deal, it's not because you lack prospecting skills, closing skills, the right words to say, or tactics for getting past the inevitable objections.
Nope, you are not getting what you want because you are not asking for what you want. Why? Nine times out of ten you are insecurely and passively beating around the bush because you are afraid to hear the word no.
In this state, confident and assumptive asking gets replaced with wishing, hoping, and wanting. You hesitate and use weak, passive words. Your tone of voice and body language exude insecurity and desperation. You wait for your prospect to do your job for you and set the appointment, set the next step, or close the deal themselves.
But they don't.
Instead, they resist and push back with objections. They put you off, brush you off, turn you off, and sometimes steamroll right over you. Your passive, insecure, fearful behavior only serves to encourage more resistance and rejection.
In sales, passive doesn't work. Insecurity won't play. Wishing and hoping is not a viable strategy.
Only direct, confident, assumptive asking gets you what you want.
Conjuring the Deepest, Darkest Human Fear
Asking with confidence is one of the most difficult things for humans to do. The assumptive ask requires you to put it all out there and take an emotional risk, with no guarantees. When you ask with confidence, you make yourself instantly vulnerable, with no place to take cover.Vulnerability, according to Dr. Brene Brown, author of the Power of Vulnerability, is created in the presence of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure. This vulnerability conjures up the deepest and darkest of human fears: Rejection.
Leading up to your ask, everything in your body and mind are screaming at you to stop as the anticipation of being rejected generates this deep sens...
