Sam Brooks
from Riding in Cars with (Mostly Straight) Boys
20
Shaneâs car.
Shane has picked Kyle up from home.
KYLE: Hug.
SHANE: Nope.
KYLE: Câmon.
SHANE: âŠ
Nnnnnope.
KYLE: Hate you.
SHANE: Whereâre we going?
KYLE: Town.
SHANE: Cool.
Shane starts driving.
Kyle watches Shane as he drives. He wants to tell him immediately.
Awkward silence.
KYLE: Shane.
SHANE: Yeah.
KYLE: Uh ⊠um.
Huh. Haaaa.
Iâ
SHANE: Howâs the flower store?
KYLE: Sâgood!
SHANE: And ⊠Mary?
KYLE: Martha.
Sheâs good.
âŠ
Howâs school?
SHANE: Uni.
KYLE: Yeah.
SHANE: Itâs uni.
KYLE: I know. How is it?
SHANE: So cool.
I live in this house with like six other people.
KYLE: Six?
SHANE: Yeah, like two guys and four girls. So cool.
My room is like the attic. Or it used to be, because it was a flat. Now itâs my room.
So cool.
KYLE: How are your flatmates?
SHANE: So coolâ
KYLE: Sounds like everything is so cool.
SHANE: Well they are.
This girl, Victoria, introduced me to Tori Amosâ
KYLE: Um, what?
SHANE: You know, Tori Amos.
KYLE: I introduced you to Tori Amos.
SHANE: No you didnât.
KYLE: Uh, yes I did.
SHANE: Iâm pretty sure you didâ
KYLE: Pretty sure I did? Is that how that sentence ends? Because if it ends any other way, you are like, three thousand percent wrong.
SHANE: âŠ
Are you okay? Youâre being weird.
KYLE: I introduced you to Tori Amos. Ages ago.
SHANE: No, Victoria did. This year.
KYLE: No, I did.
SHANE: Butâ
KYLE: Look, itâs not important.
Drop it.
âŠ
Iâm sorry.
SHANE: âŠ
Anyway, she introduced me to Manic Street Preachers too.
KYLE: Is she fifty?
SHANE: Have you heard them?
KYLE: They did a Kylie Minogue album. In 1997.
Shane snorts.
What?
SHANE: Nothing.
KYLE: No, what?
SHANE: Doesnât really count.
KYLE: Fuck you it counts.
SHANE: Whoaâ
KYLE: You just donât like her because itâs Kylie Minogue.
You havenât even heard the album.
SHANE: You only like her because you have the same name.
KYLE: Since when are Kylie and Kyle the same name? Thereâs like a whole extra vowel.
Thatâs like saying Shane and Shania are the same! Are they the same, Shania?
Shane goes to talk.
No, not the point!
It is such a fucking good album and you wonât even listen to it.
I gave it to you and you still wonât listen to it because itâs Kylie fucking Minogue!
SHANE: Wait, whatâ
KYLE: And you know what? Kylie Minogue is great outside of that.
Sheâs amazing.
âCanât Get You Out Of My Headâ is one of the best pop songs ever.
SHANE: Kyleâ
KYLE: Ever.
And even the rest of them are great. And you wonât even give her a fair try.
Yet youâll listen to your folksy, indie, boring music shit for ages.
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