Bob was so stressed out from his second session with the CEO that he decided to stop at the health club on his way homeâsomething he was beginning to do a bit more frequently, despite his dislike of rigid exercise routines. Once on the road, he called his wife from his cell phone to make sure she concurred with his plans. There was no answer, so he left a message for her.
He did a full routine, nearly burning himself out, then enjoyed an extraordinarily long respite in the spa and the steam room. He watched CNN on the locker-room TV as he dressed. Maybe the spa, the steam room, and CNN are the reasons Iâm finally getting more into the health club routine, he told himself.
Thenâas refreshed and relaxed as heâd been in daysâhe drove home at a full ten miles per hour below the speed limit. Unusual behavior for Always-in-a-Hurry Bob.
He arrived to an empty house. No wife. No daughter. No son. Where had they all headed off to? He was just settling in to watch the fourth quarter of an NBA game when his family walked in.
âDad, where were you?â his daughter demandedâhalf screaming, half in tearsâas she stormed off to her room.
âYeah, Dad. Good job,â Bobâs son added as he grabbed a slice of cold pizza from the fridge and headed toward his room. âWe were all wondering where you were. You promised youâd be there.â
Bob was suddenly aloneâexcept for the chilling fact that his disgruntled wife was still within striking distance. âOkay, Bob, I want to know something. Donât you ever look at that fancy, expensive electronic calendar of yours? How could you forget something as important as Michelleâs line dance competition?â
âThat was tonight?â Bob the Completely Out-of-Touch Manager asked.
âYes, Bob. It was tonight. Somehow it didnât make your dandy new priority list. You seem to participate in everything at the last minuteâif at all!â
Those words burned bitterly in Bobâs mind as his wife angrily ascended the stairs to their bedroom. Her last audible words were, âI am sure disappointed in you, Robert. And so are your children.â
Bob sat there for the longest time as he agonized over his wifeâs parting comments. Countless thoughts poured through his mind.
Am I that bad a husband?
Am I that awful a father?
Am I an undesirable employee?
Am I really a Last-Minute Manager?
Bob was immersed in his thoughts and deep in remorse when his wife quietly came back down the stairs and slipped into the family room.
âIâm sorry, Bob. I shouldnât have been so hard on you, but Michelle was excited that you were going to come to her line dance competition and when you didnât show, she was really hurt.â
âIâm the one who should be saying âIâm sorry,â â said Bob. âI feel like a complete failure.â
âYouâre not a failure, Bob,â she responded as she wrapped her arms around him. âYouâre justâweâre justâgoing through a lot right now. And this so-called Chief Effectiveness Officer isnât making things any easier.â
âIâm not so sure about that,â Bob suggested. âI think she may be helping me see things in a different light, even though it didnât help tonight. In fact, today I got another mystery envelope. Iâm going to get through it, no matter what. I donât care how unusual this whole process is, Iâm going to stick with it to the end. Iâm going to get taken off probation. And, blast it, from now on, Iâm not going to be known as a last-minute manager!â
Bob headed for the study. He opened the envelope and pulled out a single sheet of paper. There were no questions to answer. Just a short list of thoughts to consider.
PROPRIETY: THE BILL OF RIGHTS
- Do the right thing.
- Do it for the right reasons.
- Do it with the right people.
- Do it at the right time.
- Do it in the right order.
- Do it with intensity.
- Do it for the right results.
Bob studied the words, then studied them some more. He thought about the events that had just taken place that evening.
If this means what I think it does, I violated the rights of my family in a big way tonight. I sure didnât do the right thing. The right thing would have been to attend Michelleâs competition. I couldâve been there if I had just taken ten seconds to check my schedule. The right reason is because sheâs my daughter and she wants me to see her perform. The right people? Well, that would be my family. Thereâs no question that I did everything at the wrong time in the wrong order for the wrong results. I think I need to apologizeâand do it with intensity.
Bob stuffed the sheet of paper back into the envelope and went to find his daughter. He took her in his arms and said, âMichelle, I canât begin to tell you how sorry I am that I missed your competition. I just blew it. I have no excuse. I donât know how I can make it up to you but Iâll try. I promise you one thing, though. Youâre going to see some changes in my behavior. I want to be a part of your life and be a dad you can love and be proud of.â
Michelle looked up at him with tears in her eyes. âThanks, Dad.â
The world is suddenly a better place, Bob thought as he headed down the hall to his sonâs room to finish the nightâs apologies. When he finally climbed into bed with his wife, they didnât say anything, but just hugged each other.
Bob the More Determined Manager actually showed up for his appointment with the CEO five minutes early. I hope she notices! She didnât. Or if she did, she didnât acknowledge it.
âWhat do you think about the second P?â she asked.
âI personally discovered last night that âproprietyâ not only helps us determine what our priorities should be, but also what needs to be done to ensure that what we do is high quality,â Bob said confidently.
âYouâre right. Thatâs exactly it.â
âI imagine it will take some time and practice for me to be able to apply the Bill of Rights to all of my priorities on a consistent basis.â
âIt will,â the CEO agreed. âBut if you stick with me, youâll discover that Iâve found some unique ways to help you with that.â
âWhat ways?â
âHereâs a simple example: Iâm going to begin to deliver a daily voicemail message for interested employees. Anyone in the company will have the option of dialing a special extension to listen to it. Iâve researched all sorts of little nuggets of time-tested, life-changing wisdom from a variety of sources, and I will be sharing them in those brief messages.â
âDo you have an example of these nuggets?â Bob the Still Somewhat Skeptical Manager asked.
âSure. Hereâs one youâve heard, I imagine. âWhat a person plants, he or she will harvest.â â
âIâve heard that. âAs you sow, so shall you reap,â right?â
âThatâs it. Of course, this is not simply about corn or beans or wheat. Itâs about life in general. If parents donât spend time with their kids when theyâre youngâteaching them right from wrong and listening to their thoughts and dreamsâthey canât expect to have good relationships with them later in life. They canât count on their kids to make sound decisions, either. So thatâs a priority.â
âThat makes sense,â Bob the Still Feeling Guilty Father said. âAnd I guess you could say that particular thought is time-tested.â
âHow about this thought? âTwo wrongs donât make a right.â â
âIâve heard that one, too.â
âAs true as that seems to be, we have a twist on that saying, based on the Bill of Rights. âTwo rights donât make a wrong.â No matter what decision is facing you, if you can apply two or more of the ârightsâ to the situation, youâll seldom go wrong. The more rights you bring to the situation, the better the outcome will likely be.â
âInteresting thought,â said Bob.
âHereâs another one: âTreat others the way you would like to be treated.â â
Bob jumped right in again. âYou mentioned that one the first day we met. âDo unto others as you would have them do unto you.â â
âRight again. The point is, thatâs one of the time-tested truths that serves as a guideline for how our company intends to conduct business now and in the future. Far too many businesses operate under the principle âDo others in before they do you in.â â
âThatâs the truth,â Bob agreed.
âIn our company, our long-term goal is to do our best to make sure that everyone comes out aheadâour customers, our suppliers, our coworkers, and, yes, even our managers and upper-level executives. Our new goal will be to make certain that we never have a labor-management conflict again. Our people need to trust managementâand vice versa.â
âThatâs an impressive goal!â Bob the Impressed Manager exclaimed.
âNot so impressive when we understand what our priorities are, and how the principles of propriety mesh with them.â
âStill, our company has never thought this way before. I guess thatâs why Iâm amazed.â
âAs you can probably guess, most of my morning phone messages will apply my nuggets of wisdom to the Three Pâs and the Bill of Rights.â
âI assume you have specific definitions for all of the points on the Bill of Rights, then,â Bob supposed.
âI do, but Iâm hoping that youâll give me your definitions.â
Bob eagerly agreed to take on this latest assignment.
âWhat do you imagine we mean by âDo the right thingâ?â the CEO asked.
âIâd guess you mean that thereâs right and wrong, and you want our people to choose whatâs right over whatâs wrong,â Bob suggested.
âWe sure do. But how do you know whatâs ârightâ and whatâs âwrongâ?â
âYou got me there,â Bob confessed. âInstincts, maybe?â
âGood instincts help, but I like to use whatâs become known as The Ethics Check,â said the CEO.
âWhen confronted by a potential ethical problemâwhere right and wrong may be at oddsâI ask myself three questions:
1. Is it legal?
- Will I be violating either civil law or company policy?
2. Is it balanced?
- Is it fair to all concerned in the short term as well as in the long term? Does it promote win-win relationships?
3. How will it make me feel about myself?
- Will it make me proud?
- Would I feel good if my decision were to be published in the newspaper?
- Would I feel good if my family knew about it?
âThe first question is about legality, the second about fairness, and the third involves self-esteem. Most people only ask the legal question. But there are times when something may be legal but not ethical.â
âCan you give me an example?â
âSure,â the CEO replied. âWeâve all read about examples where something was legal in terms of accounting procedures, but unfair to coworkers, customers, and stockholders. If the top managers knew that what they did was going to be made public, they probably would have thought twice about it.â
Bob reflected on her words for a moment. âYouâre right. Just because something is legal doesnât make it right. You have to ask all three questions. Thatâs powerful.â
âI think so,â said the CEO with a smile. âBut the next principleâdo it for the right reasonsâis a bit more tricky.â
âWhat do you mean âtrickyâ?â
âIt has to do with motives. Think about Martin Luther King, Jr., for example. He did the right thing. He worked for civil rights. But did he do it for personal fame? Did he do it to make money? Or did he do it to help millions of people attain equality?â
âFor equality,â Bob quickly replied.
âRight! Although he never made a fortune as the result of his efforts, he did achieve a measure of fame. But that was merely a by-product of his efforts to erase the boundaries of race and color. His goal wasâaccording to The Ethics Check mottoâto âpromote win-win relationships.â â
âYet he died from an assassinâs bullet,â Bob observed.
âTrue. Doing the right thing for the right reasons offers no assurance of personal safe...